Step MIL won't let sons see father's will

[Anonymous]

Who is the executor? It may not be the MIL. Is the executor comfortable with the knowledge they have about the will and responsibilities?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a slightly different perspective since my dad gave me a copy of his will in advance and I have given a copy of my will to my sibling and the person who would have custody of my kids. I did not look at my dad's will when he gave it to me (he was healthy at the time) and then when he died out of the blue there were questions the will raised that I wish I had asked. For example, he had some assets going into a trust, but he did not change the beneficiary of some of his accounts so that the beneficiary of the accounts was the trust. I knew to do that from my own will and so would have asked about it. I assume it was a mistake he did not do that but maybe it was on purpose. Now I'll never know because he died and I didnt read the will ahead of time and clarify it.

I just don't understand all the secrecy around money and wills - if he is giving all the money to his wife, wouldn't he want his kids to know that? They are going to find out at some point...

Yeah but they'll find out after he's gone and he won't have to listen to it

Still shouldn't people own their decisions? This is his son. It seems like the loving thing to do to be open about this, no matter how the will is structured and then deal with the fall out. If my adult kids were upset about my will, to me that would be all the more reason to share it with them in advance. Why be secretive?

Because people don’t want input into their wills. They don’t want to be pressured into changing it. They don’t want to gain, or lose, relationships based on it. The executor should know they are the executor and have copy but that’s it. And OP shouldn’t be asking for the will at all.

Medical directives are different. Everyone should have one and discuss it with people around them. If you are DNR and what means you’re okay with extending your life. And the people on the directive making the decisions should have a digital copy in their email that they can access at any time in the event it’s needed. If a patient is DNR but you don’t have the proper documentation, they you cannot do anything to make sure their wishes are honored.

[Anonymous]

You have no more right to see his will than you have to see my will. You are beyond ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

This is wild. I hope the SMIL is on some other Internet forum dragging you to filth for the catharsis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband's dad is old (late 80s) and has not been well lately. I have asked my husband and his siblings for years to make sure they had a copy of their dad's will and any relevant financial information, after going through a really hard time when my parents died trying to figure everything out. They avoided the discussion, and now that it's relevant they finally asked for this information from their stepmother, with whom we've always had a good relationship. She is refusing to show them a will.

We are not talking about a lot of money, he was a fed his whole life so he has a nice savings but we not millions. We never made any financial decisions with the expectations that we would inherit any money. If the stepmom gets all the money, fine. But it seems odd to me that she won't even show us the will so we have some understanding of who is the executor, etc. and we have no idea of their financial status if we have to find them a housing situation with medical care. She is old as well so while the expectation is that she will outlive my father in law, it's certainly not guaranteed so we want to have access to relevant information if she is gone and he is incapacitated.

Do adult children have any legal right to request their father's will from his spouse?

What a nasty post OP. Shame on you.

[Anonymous]

OP: There several possibilities,
there is no will and she is embarrassed by that
she is the primary recipient and she doesn’t want it to change
She was flustered then defensive and possibly can’t find it

Does you4 DH know your father’s attorney? If he has one?