Husband and I are at odds over DD's eating

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You consider beans a breakfast food???

It sounds fine to me. She’s eating a big variety of foods. Who cares if she doesn’t like meat and “kid food”?

Op here. I studied abroad in the UK and guess it stuck with me

Omg I'm dying. Sorry to go off topic but the idea that someone spent four months in college in London and now considers beans a breakfast food is hilarious.

I’m not OP but i am English. Baked Beans are a breakfast food in England. They’re part of a full English breakfast.

[Anonymous]

OP here and thanks for the good laugh regarding DCUM being DCUM and arguing whether I have the right to enjoy beans on toast LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our 4yo only eats breakfast-ish foods. She has never swallowed a bite of meat or fish in her entire life, even during baby led weaning. She is over 99% for height and 65% for weight. DD prefers to serve her "dinner foods" aka meat, starch, veggie that she will not eat and then have her go hungry until she gives in and eats it (she hasn't in the past). I prefer to just give her what she enjoys, she eats it, and we move on.

She eats a rotation/combination of:
Greek yogurt
Any fruit
Omlettes (with any veggies)
Beans and toast
Oatmeal
Veggie and sweet potato hash as long as it's served with another breakfast item
Smoothies with any fruits and veggies
Homemade banana oat flax break
Toast with anything on it- PB, almond butter, jelly, or avocado
Hard boiled eggs
Homemade pancakes of any kind- sweet potato, berry, zucchini, etc
She drinks milk, almond milk, ripple (whichever we have on hand) and water

Dh also gets annoyed that she won't eat any kid food- chicken nuggets, hot dogs, pizza, etc. I will admit that could be difficult when away from home, but we haven't taken her to a restaurant or anything since covid anyway.

Is it worth pressing her to widen her food choices or just let it be

She eats a wider variety of foods than my kids, who also don’t like meat (but mine do like fish). Not eating meat is not a problem as long as you get protein from other sources which it sounds da like your daughter does w eggs, PB, etc. she sounds healthy to me and obviously is growing fine so why stress it?

Also, it’s a good thing she doesn’t like typical “kid foods.” Who would be upset their kid doesn’t want to eat junk like chicken nuggets or hot dogs? That’s very odd to me. I’d much rather my kid eat eggs and oatmeal and beans than chicken nuggets and hot dogs!

[Anonymous]

First - this sounds like a pretty healthy variety of food, though I understand it's kind of limiting/a pain if you want to eat out. Second, just keep giving her the breakfast-type foods but add a new food on the side sometimes. It takes kids many exposures to a particular food to develop comfort with it.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like your kid has a great diet. Of course it's not worth pushing her to eat chicken nuggets or meat. But, you already know this, and I doubt your DH will be moved when you tell him that a bunch of us harpies on DCUM agree with you!

FWIW, my kid would only eat oatmeal and scrambled eggs until he was about 4. He is 5 1/2 now, and eats most things, except he hates things that are hard to chew.

[Anonymous]

I generally serve my kids the regular meal I've made for dinner, and make sure there are a few items I know they will eat that don't require extra time for prep (usually yogurt, fruit and raw veggies). I encourage them to try everything but don't make it a struggle/battle. I also do make it a policy that you have to put in a good effort on dinner if you want dessert My parents made me "clean my plate" with things I really hated as a kid and I still remember it being miserable for all of us. I still remember a several-hour standoff over a hot dog (I thought they were vile). I became a vegetarian early and have been one for 25 years because I really just didn't like meat from the time I was small- I eat pretty much anything that isn't meat/fish though!

I'd consider making extra of your veggie pancakes and hard boiled eggs (or other things that will keep in the fridge) and give those to her at meal times along with the normal meal, and give her a greek yogurt. The list has a lot of variety and healthy things!

Agree with the previous posters that it would be weird to push processed "kid" foods. Honestly if you go out to a restaurant and she doesn't eat or doesn't eat much it's not a big deal for one meal IMO.

[Anonymous]

What seems to be the problem? Your daughter is eating a wide variety of foods.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree with PPs that you should compromise and serve one thing from her approved list plus introduce new dinner foods at the same time. You are most likely to discover new things she will eat this way and the exposure will normalize for her that she will not always be served her favorite foods. Your DH should back off on demanding she eat certain foods and getting visibly frustrated when she doesn’t though— it’s self defeating and likely causing her to dig in her heels.

ALSO

Can you point me to recipes for both banana flax oat thing and your various pancakes because my breakfast loving 4 yr old would enjoy both.

https://thebigmansworld.com/oat-flour-banana-bread/ or https://beamingbaker.com/super-moist-vegan-oatmeal-chocolate-chip-banana-bread-gluten-free-healthy-recipe/ Both freeze great so I double the recipes.

https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1013960-zucchini-pancakes or I also use the SkinnyTaste Zucchini Tots recipe

These sheet pan pancakes are so easy to pop in the oven. You can sub all the dry ingredients for 2 cups of regular pancake mix and it works just as well in a pinch. Our favorite is blueberry lemon https://www.punchfork.com/recipe/Yogurt-Sheet-Pan-Pancakes-with-Berries-Skinnytaste

Thank you! Adding to the rotation. Both also sound like they travel well which is great because while DD is not that picky in general we have to send lunch for her to school and it's the one place where we really do struggle to find food she likes to eat. She is very used to eating things that are freshly prepared. But loves baked goods, so I'm optimistic about these.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You consider beans a breakfast food???

It sounds fine to me. She’s eating a big variety of foods. Who cares if she doesn’t like meat and “kid food”?

Op here. I studied abroad in the UK and guess it stuck with me

Omg I'm dying. Sorry to go off topic but the idea that someone spent four months in college in London and now considers beans a breakfast food is hilarious.

I’m not OP but i am English. Baked Beans are a breakfast food in England. They’re part of a full English breakfast.

DP. Yeah I think we knew that part
lol.

[Anonymous]

Her diet sounds amazing! Why the heck would you force meat or gross processed stuff like chicken nuggets on a child with a diet this varied?! Stand your ground, OP. You're doing a great job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would do a middle ground. Server her regular dinner foods that she will not eat, BUT include one thing from your list of food she likes every night, so she can eat that. She won't go hungry, but with the food always on the plate (small amounts obviously, you don't want to waste a full plate of food), one day, she just might take a bite of something.

This. Don't make it a big deal because it isn't one. She isn't starving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would do a middle ground. Server her regular dinner foods that she will not eat, BUT include one thing from your list of food she likes every night, so she can eat that. She won't go hungry, but with the food always on the plate (small amounts obviously, you don't want to waste a full plate of food), one day, she just might take a bite of something.

+1 Exposure, exposure, exposure to new foods. No pressure, no making a big deal over what she does eat and what she leaves on the plate. Just offer it and include one "safe" food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You consider beans a breakfast food???

It sounds fine to me. She’s eating a big variety of foods. Who cares if she doesn’t like meat and “kid food”?

Op here. I studied abroad in the UK and guess it stuck with me

Omg I'm dying. Sorry to go off topic but the idea that someone spent four months in college in London and now considers beans a breakfast food is hilarious.

I studied in London years ago and still love jacket potatoes with beans and tuna and all kinds of semi weird toppings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our 4yo only eats breakfast-ish foods. She has never swallowed a bite of meat or fish in her entire life, even during baby led weaning. She is over 99% for height and 65% for weight. DD prefers to serve her "dinner foods" aka meat, starch, veggie that she will not eat and then have her go hungry until she gives in and eats it (she hasn't in the past). I prefer to just give her what she enjoys, she eats it, and we move on.

She eats a rotation/combination of:
Greek yogurt
Any fruit
Omlettes (with any veggies)
Beans and toast
Oatmeal
Veggie and sweet potato hash as long as it's served with another breakfast item
Smoothies with any fruits and veggies
Homemade banana oat flax break
Toast with anything on it- PB, almond butter, jelly, or avocado
Hard boiled eggs
Homemade pancakes of any kind- sweet potato, berry, zucchini, etc
She drinks milk, almond milk, ripple (whichever we have on hand) and water

Dh also gets annoyed that she won't eat any kid food- chicken nuggets, hot dogs, pizza, etc. I will admit that could be difficult when away from home, but we haven't taken her to a restaurant or anything since covid anyway.

Is it worth pressing her to widen her food choices or just let it be

It's a vicious cycle, you only cook the things she likes so she only eats the things she likes. If you want to stop, then you cook a dinner, serve it, and if she fusses she does and if she doesn't eat then she doesn't eat and just know that she will be fine until the next meal.

We had a similar cycle and ended up cutting out snacks on the weekends. This almost always guaranteed that our kids would eat what was served at dinner with minimal complaint. Yes there was some complaint but when they realized it was either eat what was served or not eat, they were too hungry to not eat.

[Anonymous]

Your daughter has a VERY similar diet to what mine had at that age. Healthy, great variety, mostly vegetarian, but limited and hard to take to restaurants. She's 6 now and it impacts her more than when she was 4. Your DH is right that it IS frustrating when they won't eat any kid food, but for social reasons only. She can't go over friends' houses at meal times because she can't eat what's served, school lunches are a work in progress (though she gets the vegetarian menu and is doing well eating more of what's served), birthday parties, barbeques, etc. etc. So I'd say work on it, but don't make it a battle. One thing we did was start talking about how her selectivity would impact her (being hungry during school, not able to visit her friend, getting stomach aches if she lets her body get too hungry), and that really made a difference. It worked because we never forced it, but would keep offering and talking positively and encouraging "try bites." She'll now tell me she'll eat something "even though she didn't really like it" because she knew she needed to. That's great and means she'll continue expanding the variety. And if she never eats a real hamburger or steak in her life, who cares. She'll live longer for it and the world is very accommodating to vegetarians now.