Anonymous wrote:One of my female friends has been dating a man for about a year and a half. He's mentioned wanting to get married a couple times, but hasn't initiated a real conversation on it, set a timetable, talked about engagement rings, etc. which has frustrated her a bit.
The other day, he mentioned moving in together and she let him know she wasn't comfortable living together until after they were married. He was upset over this and implied requiring marriage before living together means she doesn't value him as a person.
I said that this seems like a huge red flag to me. He makes more money and doesn't need to be supported, but it feels like one of those "get the milk for free" things. Like he gets all the perks of a wife without any of the risk or responsibilities. And that if he valued her as a person, he'd respect her values.
Neither is wrong in their beliefs, but they may be incompatible. Every married couple I know lived together first, aside from one set who met at a Bible college and married as soon as they graduated.
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