My married crush just made a pass at me

[Anonymous]

Bang him, he might be your soulmate.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Same thing happened to me many years ago. I was like “dude your wife is amazing and you have kids, you are a serious sleezeball.” Crush dead, problem solved.

And of course you did absolutely nothing to let him know you were interested? You liked the attention, but when it got real you blamed him and called him a sleezeball? What does that make you?

Oh yes, making polite conversation with this dude and his wife during dinner was such a hussy thing to do. 🙄

Do some self-examination and consider why you jumped to the conclusion that i must have somehow contributed to his sleezy behavior. This says so much more about you than it does about me.

NP who agrees with the PP - you should ask yourself why the sleaze ball thought there was a chance that you might be interested. Guys like him have pretty good radar as to where to throw their bait.

Wow you people are jerks. I was 18, on a road trip with a friend, chatting with a big group of people and that was our only interaction. Besides, even if I was flirting with him by talking to him and laughing at his jokes, it is sleazy for a married guy to make a pass at somebody, especially an 18 year old. He probably thought he had a chance because he was an entitled ass; you have no idea what kind of person he was. Don’t be victim blamers.

Except you weren't a victim; you were a willing participant.

NP don’t pay any attention to these harridans. They are ridiculous Puritans who lack all sense of proportion.

Why is wrong with you people? Have you never been in a situation where somebody made an unwanted, uninvited pass at you? You make it sound like that’s just not possible and that everybody who gets romantic/attention has done something to deserve it, or that if you have a normal conversation with somebody that’s as good as a “hey I’m willing to sleep with you!” You all are gross.

+1 to what is wrong with them. Each of us are accountable for our actions. If one is married, one shouldn't be flirting with others no matter how enticing that other person may be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Bang him, he might be your soulmate.

At least swallow some of his swimmers to see if there is a spark.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don't understand this. Don't women realize that the vast majority of married men will absolutely cheat if an attractive (especially younger) woman shows interest?

I don’t know about the vast majority but there are many good men with this weakness who do not deserve to be burned at the stake for it. And no, I was in my mid-40s before I began to understand the world of men. Reading about it can only teach you so much and if you have been on the straight and narrow you don’t get any first hand experience.

Good men don't cheat on their wives.

Exactly. That's the obvious answer. If my spouse was making passes I would be long done regardless.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don't understand this. Don't women realize that the vast majority of married men will absolutely cheat if an attractive (especially younger) woman shows interest?

I don’t know about the vast majority but there are many good men with this weakness who do not deserve to be burned at the stake for it. And no, I was in my mid-40s before I began to understand the world of men. Reading about it can only teach you so much and if you have been on the straight and narrow you don’t get any first hand experience.

I think all the men and women actively cheating via Ashley Madison should be burned at the stake, but first the creators of the website.

Okay, we’ll, that place is scummy but there are all kinds of people in the world besides that.

So these men/women are bad then, correct?

The AM thing is not my cup of tea and seems super sleazy but I’m sure there are good and decent people who cheat for whatever reason and I’d at least try to understand it before judging their entire worth as people or spouses.

Anecdotally, I know two married women that have had affairs from AM and they are the most delusional, self-absorbed women I know. Both are mentally ill. I think one is bipolar and the other borderline personality disorder. It's all about making them 'a better mother' which they aren't because they lie to the husband to watch the kids so they can go bang someone else, or go away for the weekend with him.

You have to be a very shitty person or mentally ill to actively go on that website to find a married stranger to have an affair with...all so you can blow up two families. Not.good.people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand this. Don't women realize that the vast majority of married men will absolutely cheat if an attractive (especially younger) woman shows interest?

I don’t know about the vast majority but there are many good men with this weakness who do not deserve to be burned at the stake for it. And no, I was in my mid-40s before I began to understand the world of men. Reading about it can only teach you so much and if you have been on the straight and narrow you don’t get any first hand experience.

Good men don't cheat on their wives.

Good men are not solely defined by whether they remained faithful to their wives. JFK, Muhammed Ali, Bill Clinton, Martin Luther King..... all don't count a "good men", I guess.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don't understand this. Don't women realize that the vast majority of married men will absolutely cheat if an attractive (especially younger) woman shows interest?

I don’t know about the vast majority but there are many good men with this weakness who do not deserve to be burned at the stake for it. And no, I was in my mid-40s before I began to understand the world of men. Reading about it can only teach you so much and if you have been on the straight and narrow you don’t get any first hand experience.

Good men don't cheat on their wives.

Good men are not solely defined by whether they remained faithful to their wives. JFK, Muhammed Ali, Bill Clinton, Martin Luther King..... all don't count a "good men", I guess.

You listed successful men. Success does not equal good. I agree with PP that good men don't cheat on their wives.

[Anonymous]

Those men had plenty of accomplishments but were not good people. Question for the ladies - if you could go back in time and be married to one of them, would you want to?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those men had plenty of accomplishments but were not good people. Question for the ladies - if you could go back in time and be married to one of them, would you want to?

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those men had plenty of accomplishments but were not good people. Question for the ladies - if you could go back in time and be married to one of them, would you want to?

Absolutely

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those men had plenty of accomplishments but were not good people. Question for the ladies - if you could go back in time and be married to one of them, would you want to?

No. I don't think any of them were particularly great husbands, and to deal with that level of public scrutiny, you'd have to be damned near perfect for me to want you as a husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If my old crush made a pass I’d have a very, very hard time not following them to a dark place. Glad I don’t see them anymore. They are my kryptonite.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those men had plenty of accomplishments but were not good people. Question for the ladies - if you could go back in time and be married to one of them, would you want to?

Not really, don’t find any all that attractive. MLK has some charisma but I knew a guy like that in real life and he was full of himself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those men had plenty of accomplishments but were not good people. Question for the ladies - if you could go back in time and be married to one of them, would you want to?

Not really, don’t find any all that attractive. MLK has some charisma but I knew a guy like that in real life and he was full of himself.

Good point. More often than not, guys with that level of success tend to have over-the-top egos that would make an intimate relationship exceedingly difficult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those men had plenty of accomplishments but were not good people. Question for the ladies - if you could go back in time and be married to one of them, would you want to?

No. They are not good husbands (at least not for me), but it doesn't mean they are not good people. There are plenty of good people out there that I don't want them to be my husband.