How do you address elementary school teachers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mr/Ms first name is the convention at my child's school. I use those in emails. Face to Face I use the teacher's first name.

lol. I do this with my gastroenterologist, but that’s because I know him personally and it’s hard to break the habit. It confuses the front desk staff.

I’ll note that it is very common to use the first names of mid-level providers, namely nurse practitioners and physician assistants. I don’t see why it would be strange to do the same with teachers. Vaguely similar, I don’t know anyone that actually uses the “Dr” title with a PhD, save for a few people only in the context of speaking to students in a college-level class. No one introduces themselves with that term, and it very uncommon for others to introduce them with that title.

Teachers seem to be the odd one out here. Both for “Ms/Mr” and frequently using “Dr” in relatively informal settings for a PhD and especially lower-level doctorate degrees like an EdD.

I find the Dr part hilarious. I know a few teachers with PhDs and most got them part time from the easiest program they could find just for the pay bump.

Are you sure they got PhDs? I assume most got a Doctor of Education degree, like Monifa McKnight of MCPS. Not at all comparable to a PhD.

[Anonymous]

Ms or Mr X

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I received an email today from my son’s teacher addressed to My First Name. He signed it Mr. Last Name. I’m old enough to be teacher’s mother. I did reply back Mr. Last Name and signed it with My First Name, but was totally annoyed. If you’re going to call me by my first name, then sign your first name. Otherwise, I’m Mrs Last Name and you’re Mr. Last Name.

I like this format. I am never going to remember the teacher’s first name and am fine following the same format my kid uses. On the other hand I feel odd when the teachers keep calling me Ms M because it feels very cold and distant to me. No one else refers to me by that way unless it is the first time they are reaching out to me as a cold call or from overseas

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Always Mr/Ms unless they sign emails with their first name.

Dear Mr. Studentfather,

Technically it is improper etiquette to sign your own name with an honorific.

I realize that no one follows etiquette anymore.

Sincerely,

Elvira T. Crabapple
First Grade Teacher
Larlandria Elementary School

/Mr. Studentfather would respond thusly:/

Dear Mrs. Crabapple,{this is how she is referred to by her students: Miss/Ms./Mrs.}

Thank you for advising me about Joseph’s missed assignment. Blah blah blah…

Sincerely,

Robert Jones

(There’s no first name used except in the signatures)

In education, I start formal and will only call you by your first name IF you tell me to do so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mr/Ms first name is the convention at my child's school. I use those in emails. Face to Face I use the teacher's first name.

lol. I do this with my gastroenterologist, but that’s because I know him personally and it’s hard to break the habit. It confuses the front desk staff.

I’ll note that it is very common to use the first names of mid-level providers, namely nurse practitioners and physician assistants. I don’t see why it would be strange to do the same with teachers. Vaguely similar, I don’t know anyone that actually uses the “Dr” title with a PhD, save for a few people only in the context of speaking to students in a college-level class. No one introduces themselves with that term, and it very uncommon for others to introduce them with that title.

Teachers seem to be the odd one out here. Both for “Ms/Mr” and frequently using “Dr” in relatively informal settings for a PhD and especially lower-level doctorate degrees like an EdD.

Teachers aren't "mid-level providers".

Right. They've had less training in less rigorous programs. Which means it makes even less sense to not use their first name.

No, no and no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I address the parents by their last name and expect the same in return unless I tell you to use my first name. We (teachers) even refer to one another by last name out of habit.

I’m the above poster. I don’t know any teachers that call each other by last names. Where do you work? I’ve been in three schools and have not seen this.

I’ve worked in two different districts and a third for my student teaching, and I think 6 schools within those districts and in all of them staff used last names to refer to each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mr/Ms first name is the convention at my child's school. I use those in emails. Face to Face I use the teacher's first name.

lol. I do this with my gastroenterologist, but that’s because I know him personally and it’s hard to break the habit. It confuses the front desk staff.

I’ll note that it is very common to use the first names of mid-level providers, namely nurse practitioners and physician assistants. I don’t see why it would be strange to do the same with teachers. Vaguely similar, I don’t know anyone that actually uses the “Dr” title with a PhD, save for a few people only in the context of speaking to students in a college-level class. No one introduces themselves with that term, and it very uncommon for others to introduce them with that title.

Teachers seem to be the odd one out here. Both for “Ms/Mr” and frequently using “Dr” in relatively informal settings for a PhD and especially lower-level doctorate degrees like an EdD.

Teachers aren't "mid-level providers".

Right. They've had less training in less rigorous programs. Which means it makes even less sense to not use their first name.

No, no and no.

The lady doth protest too much, methinks.

Teaching is a difficult, professional job. It is nothing to be ashamed of, but it isn't sensible to exaggerate various aspects the profession, either.

[Anonymous]

Mr./Ms. Lastname unless instructed otherwise. I find addressing someone with whom I have a professional relationship by their first name without invitation to be inappropriately familiar and overstepping a boundary. I think everything becoming overly casual these days is a bad thing and symptomatic of the general decline in civility and respect for other people. A title like Mr. or Ms. gives a little bit of formality and distance. You talk in a different way to someone you call by their first name and often don't choose your words as carefully and I think that can be a mistake. Familiarity breeds contempt.

Yes, I'm old-fashioned (though not old). Get off of my lawn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mr./Ms. Lastname unless instructed otherwise. I find addressing someone with whom I have a professional relationship by their first name without invitation to be inappropriately familiar and overstepping a boundary. I think everything becoming overly casual these days is a bad thing and symptomatic of the general decline in civility and respect for other people. A title like Mr. or Ms. gives a little bit of formality and distance. You talk in a different way to someone you call by their first name and often don't choose your words as carefully and I think that can be a mistake. Familiarity breeds contempt.

Yes, I'm old-fashioned (though not old). Get off of my lawn.

Got it. Teachers calling students and parents by their first names should be taken as a sign of contempt.

That really helps put the last 18 months into perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First name, I’m an adult talking to another adult. My kids say “Mr/Mrs” unless the teacher requests otherwise.

No. We aren’t friends. I’m not your employee. When parents call me by my first name I make sure to let them know I go by Ms. Lastname. I am a professional speaking to you as a professional, not your teenage babysitter. And I don’t call parents by their first names either.

When you’ve finished medical school or law school, I’ll call you by your title. Otherwise I’ll call you by your name and you can call me by mine. I don’t call my boss Mr Smith, he’s just John. And he’s just as professional as you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mr/Ms first name is the convention at my child's school. I use those in emails. Face to Face I use the teacher's first name.

lol. I do this with my gastroenterologist, but that’s because I know him personally and it’s hard to break the habit. It confuses the front desk staff.

I’ll note that it is very common to use the first names of mid-level providers, namely nurse practitioners and physician assistants. I don’t see why it would be strange to do the same with teachers. Vaguely similar, I don’t know anyone that actually uses the “Dr” title with a PhD, save for a few people only in the context of speaking to students in a college-level class. No one introduces themselves with that term, and it very uncommon for others to introduce them with that title.

Teachers seem to be the odd one out here. Both for “Ms/Mr” and frequently using “Dr” in relatively informal settings for a PhD and especially lower-level doctorate degrees like an EdD.

I find the Dr part hilarious. I know a few teachers with PhDs and most got them part time from the easiest program they could find just for the pay bump.

Are you sure they got PhDs? I assume most got a Doctor of Education degree, like Monifa McKnight of MCPS. Not at all comparable to a PhD.

All the teachers in my kids have their bachelors degree, none of them have a doctor of education. My neighbor got her degree in education because it was easy and she didn’t know what else she wanted to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First name, I’m an adult talking to another adult. My kids say “Mr/Mrs” unless the teacher requests otherwise.

No. We aren’t friends. I’m not your employee. When parents call me by my first name I make sure to let them know I go by Ms. Lastname. I am a professional speaking to you as a professional, not your teenage babysitter. And I don’t call parents by their first names either.

You won't call a parent by their first name even if they ask you to?

It’s pretty rude to insist on calling someone by their last name if they don’t want that. Best solution is just to ask what someone prefers to be called. My son’s K teacher prefers her first name. She’s young. My other son’s 3rd grade teacher is old and insists on “Mrs”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First name, I’m an adult talking to another adult. My kids say “Mr/Mrs” unless the teacher requests otherwise.

No. We aren’t friends. I’m not your employee. When parents call me by my first name I make sure to let them know I go by Ms. Lastname. I am a professional speaking to you as a professional, not your teenage babysitter. And I don’t call parents by their first names either.

When you’ve finished medical school or law school, I’ll call you by your title. Otherwise I’ll call you by your name and you can call me by mine. I don’t call my boss Mr Smith, he’s just John. And he’s just as professional as you are.

You have a relationship with him. You can insist upon it if you want but a) you look like a jackass with no manners or social skills and b) I will remind you each time I’m not Jane to you, I’m Ms LastName.

[Anonymous]

My default is Ms. Smith, but if they reply back to an email by writing "Hello Samantha" and sign it with "Jane", then I will reply back "Hello Jane". Basically, I follow the teacher's lead. This is the first year that both of my kids' teachers have used first names in correspondence, so I replied back accordingly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First name, I’m an adult talking to another adult. My kids say “Mr/Mrs” unless the teacher requests otherwise.

No. We aren’t friends. I’m not your employee. When parents call me by my first name I make sure to let them know I go by Ms. Lastname. I am a professional speaking to you as a professional, not your teenage babysitter. And I don’t call parents by their first names either.

When you’ve finished medical school or law school, I’ll call you by your title. Otherwise I’ll call you by your name and you can call me by mine. I don’t call my boss Mr Smith, he’s just John. And he’s just as professional as you are.

You have a relationship with him. You can insist upon it if you want but a) you look like a jackass with no manners or social skills and b) I will remind you each time I’m not Jane to you, I’m Ms LastName.

I don’t mind calling you whatever you want, but I’m not going to use Ms/Mr/Dr/etc. by default.