Tattoos of an Ex

[Anonymous]

Would it bother you if your partner had a tattoo of their ex?

I'm not talking about a small tattoo that they got together of something you'd never know was related to the ex. Or, at least could be passed off as something other than what it was.

I'm talking a tattoo that's partially visible when not wearing business attire, with name and something that's "shrine" like to go along with it.

I can't tell if I'm being petty or not that it really irritates me to see it everyday.

[Anonymous]

If it irritates you, imagine what your partner thinks about it.

[Anonymous]

Any tattoo at all would irritate me. It would be a non-starter. Huge turnoff.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't date someone who was stupid enough to get their ex's name tattoo'd on their body.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't date someone who was stupid enough to get their ex's name tattoo'd on their body.

+1

I hate tattoos, but DH has 2. If either was visible and/or involved a past partner, we'd never have dated.

[Anonymous]

OP here - I don't have a problem with tattoos...he's got a bunch, but all of them are covered in a suit or button up or polo shirt. The one i'm talking about, you can see up to half of it depending on what t-shirt he wears.

I too think that it was an idiotic move to get this tattoo. I asked him what he planned on telling future girlfriends when they asked what the tattoo was? He just said he and his ex had planned these tattoos for awhile, and they went through with them, and she would always be special in his life so he didn't think it would be a big deal (which also bothers me).

Well, now that he's definitely not going to be in a relationship with her, it is. He said he will get it removed, but hasn't brought it up since, and I'm not sure how serious he was, or if he was just was saying that to placate me in the moment. I feel like scheduling him a consultation with one of the tattoo removal places.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I don't have a problem with tattoos...he's got a bunch, but all of them are covered in a suit or button up or polo shirt. The one i'm talking about, you can see up to half of it depending on what t-shirt he wears.

I too think that it was an idiotic move to get this tattoo. I asked him what he planned on telling future girlfriends when they asked what the tattoo was? He just said he and his ex had planned these tattoos for awhile, and they went through with them, and she would always be special in his life so he didn't think it would be a big deal (which also bothers me).

Well, now that he's definitely not going to be in a relationship with her, it is. He said he will get it removed, but hasn't brought it up since, and I'm not sure how serious he was, or if he was just was saying that to placate me in the moment. I feel like scheduling him a consultation with one of the tattoo removal places.

This isn't about him, but rather you and your weird insecurities and control impulses. Are you really that hung up that he used to put his penis inside another woman?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I don't have a problem with tattoos...he's got a bunch, but all of them are covered in a suit or button up or polo shirt. The one i'm talking about, you can see up to half of it depending on what t-shirt he wears.

I too think that it was an idiotic move to get this tattoo. I asked him what he planned on telling future girlfriends when they asked what the tattoo was? He just said he and his ex had planned these tattoos for awhile, and they went through with them, and she would always be special in his life so he didn't think it would be a big deal (which also bothers me).

Well, now that he's definitely not going to be in a relationship with her, it is. He said he will get it removed, but hasn't brought it up since, and I'm not sure how serious he was, or if he was just was saying that to placate me in the moment. I feel like scheduling him a consultation with one of the tattoo removal places.

This isn't about him, but rather you and your weird insecurities and control impulses. Are you really that hung up that he used to put his penis inside another woman?

Haha, no. It's about seeing a shrine of his ex inked onto him everyday.

Would you like to see a visual reminder of your partner's ex multiple times a day?

[Anonymous]

Either you accept your partner with the tattoos or you break up.

[Anonymous]

My dad had a naked woman on his arm, he got it covered up when he got married to my mom. Just have him get another tat over it .

[Anonymous]

It's tough because while I don't find tattoos a turn off in general, I do find those tattoos a huge turn off so I wouldn't have gotten involved in the first place.

How long have you been together? The tat sounds rather large which can be expensive and painful to remove. I wouldn't book an appointment for him unless you were together for a long time and doing something like that isnt seen as controlling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's tough because while I don't find tattoos a turn off in general, I do find those tattoos a huge turn off so I wouldn't have gotten involved in the first place.

How long have you been together? The tat sounds rather large which can be expensive and painful to remove. I wouldn't book an appointment for him unless you were together for a long time and doing something like that isnt seen as controlling.

The conflict I have is that we've only been together a year, but in that year, he has done more for me than he has for his ex, who he was with for 6 years or so. I have ZERO doubt that he's in love with me. There are no issues at all in our relationship whatsoever. But it's just f'ing annoying to see. And what's he gonna tell our kids? That's daddy's ex-gf?

And yea, it's a decent size tattoo, which will take several trips to get lasered AND will be expensive, and he's putting every additional dime he has away for a ring and wedding, because he'd like to get engaged this year and married soon after. I'm highly tempted to say we can postpone getting engaged/married and put that $$ towards getting it removed.

[Anonymous]

Does he like Sons of Anarchy? Why don't you show him a knife and a blowtorch and ask him to pick?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does he like Sons of Anarchy? Why don't you show him a knife and a blowtorch and ask him to pick?

Rock salt and tequila

[Anonymous]

Just get him a jar of cover-up to dab on it when he wears short tshirts. At least until you can afford the removal/retattoo/whatever.