Tattoos of an Ex

[Anonymous]

I have a hard time with the ex's name tattoo when I'm feeling insecure.

[Anonymous]

Hmm, I'm not sure. I'm not crazy about tattoos, but assuming I got past that, or didn't feel that way, I'm not sure that I'd bothered. I tend to think that all of my DH's exes contributed (one way or another) to make him the man that I met and feel in love with, so....kind of glad he had them. Can it be converted to something else?

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't like it either OP, but I wouldn't put off the wedding to pay for the laser. You know that sometimes it doesn't go away completely, you can still see the outline? He'd be better off getting it covered with another tattoo- would that work for you?
How did you guys get this far if this tattoo always bothered you?

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

My ex-husband had a really pretty depiction of the word SOUL on his chest (placed theoretically where his soul would be.) I had complimented it before but never real poked about where or when it came about as he had lots of tats and it was just apart of him over all. So any who 4 years later we are on a cruise and we run into "an old friend". She is nice, we have a short general conversation and go about our merry way. A few days later I see her at the spa in the hot tub and she is wearing a bikini. Low and behold I see a tattoo in the same font/decor on her lower hip that says MATE. Yup, that lead to an interesting convo with my H.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My ex-husband had a really pretty depiction of the word SOUL on his chest (placed theoretically where his soul would be.) I had complimented it before but never real poked about where or when it came about as he had lots of tats and it was just apart of him over all. So any who 4 years later we are on a cruise and we run into "an old friend". She is nice, we have a short general conversation and go about our merry way. A few days later I see her at the spa in the hot tub and she is wearing a bikini. Low and behold I see a tattoo in the same font/decor on her lower hip that says MATE. Yup, that lead to an interesting convo with my H.

If this is true...best tattoo story ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't date someone who was stupid enough to get their ex's name tattoo'd on their body.

Bingo

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's tough because while I don't find tattoos a turn off in general, I do find those tattoos a huge turn off so I wouldn't have gotten involved in the first place.

How long have you been together? The tat sounds rather large which can be expensive and painful to remove. I wouldn't book an appointment for him unless you were together for a long time and doing something like that isnt seen as controlling.

The conflict I have is that we've only been together a year, but in that year, he has done more for me than he has for his ex, who he was with for 6 years or so. I have ZERO doubt that he's in love with me. There are no issues at all in our relationship whatsoever. But it's just f'ing annoying to see. And what's he gonna tell our kids? That's daddy's ex-gf?

And yea, it's a decent size tattoo, which will take several trips to get lasered AND will be expensive, and he's putting every additional dime he has away for a ring and wedding, because he'd like to get engaged this year and married soon after. I'm highly tempted to say we can postpone getting engaged/married and put that $$ towards getting it removed.

Right. You shouldn't get married right now. Not because of the tattoo, but because you are so insecure. This guy has done everything to prove himself to you, and you're obsessing over his tattoo. Why are you so insecure about yourself or the relationship? Please figure that out before getting engaged.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I don't have a problem with tattoos...he's got a bunch, but all of them are covered in a suit or button up or polo shirt. The one i'm talking about, you can see up to half of it depending on what t-shirt he wears.

I too think that it was an idiotic move to get this tattoo. I asked him what he planned on telling future girlfriends when they asked what the tattoo was? He just said he and his ex had planned these tattoos for awhile, and they went through with them, and she would always be special in his life so he didn't think it would be a big deal (which also bothers me).

Well, now that he's definitely not going to be in a relationship with her, it is. He said he will get it removed, but hasn't brought it up since, and I'm not sure how serious he was, or if he was just was saying that to placate me in the moment. I feel like scheduling him a consultation with one of the tattoo removal places.

This isn't about him, but rather you and your weird insecurities and control impulses. Are you really that hung up that he used to put his penis inside another woman?

Op, what has she done to you though? She is the ex and you are not so why do you hate her? Your reaction speaks more about yourself than her...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I don't have a problem with tattoos...he's got a bunch, but all of them are covered in a suit or button up or polo shirt. The one i'm talking about, you can see up to half of it depending on what t-shirt he wears.

I too think that it was an idiotic move to get this tattoo. I asked him what he planned on telling future girlfriends when they asked what the tattoo was? He just said he and his ex had planned these tattoos for awhile, and they went through with them, and she would always be special in his life so he didn't think it would be a big deal (which also bothers me).

Well, now that he's definitely not going to be in a relationship with her, it is. He said he will get it removed, but hasn't brought it up since, and I'm not sure how serious he was, or if he was just was saying that to placate me in the moment. I feel like scheduling him a consultation with one of the tattoo removal places.

This isn't about him, but rather you and your weird insecurities and control impulses. Are you really that hung up that he used to put his penis inside another woman?

Shut up, troll.

NP

[Anonymous]

Doesn't sound like he's over her. She will always be special to him? He is ok with the tattoo? Nah....

[Anonymous]

I don't like tattoos either, they gross me out only because I imagine that if I choose to grow old with this person, in like 40 yrs, he will look so disgusting and gross with his skin all wrinkled and tattoo'd.

And if he has anything tangible about his ex on him, then that would be a huge deal-breaker in my book.

Because any person who would get their ex's name tattoo'd on them is just a stupid, clueless idiot in my opinion and not someone I would want to invest my heart and time with.

Period.

[Anonymous]

I have a few tattoos. I could not be with anyone who would force their removal. I have one in particular that reminds me of my ex. It stays. Not because I'm still in love with him but because that experience helped to mold me into the person I am today. I will eventually get it covered but I will be damned if it is because someone else wants me too.

[Anonymous]

Maybe instead of reminding you of his ex the tattoo can remind you of things about him: he is a romantic, he is loyal, he is caring, he is fun loving. See the glass half full here - it is in your power to do so.