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Stress over school decisions
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Anonymous
| Help! My wife is very stressed over the upcoming school decisions and it's impacting the family. I have resorted to limiting any discussions - even about the weather - until early March! Any Dads (or Mom's) have any ideas as to how to cope with this? We have a child in a big 3, and son is applying now. |
Anonymous
I would suggest that if you are limiting her discussions - even about the weather - until March, then you are very likely contributing to her stress instead of alleviating it. Have you considered being less "control-freaky"? It sounds like she needs an outlet for her stress. Try offering her a night off with friends to think and talk about something else, or else a gym membership, pilates class or some personal time for long walks to work it out. Trying to shut her down without giving her a steam valve isn't going to help in the long run. |
Anonymous
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This is what your wife stresses over? We should all be so lucky.
I suggest you put things into perspective. Obviously, you have a job and can afford such an extravagance. Think about the people in this economy who can't afford to keep their homes. And as far as the other PP's recommendations are concerned - a GYM membership? pilates? Come on; get real. If school decisions are causing marital strife, counseling is a better option. |
Anonymous
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This post makes very little sense to me. If you already have a child in a "Big 3" your younger child will likely get in. In fact, if you call the school, they will already have decided about the siblings. If you are concerned about whether your younger child will be accepted just call the school and find out.
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Anonymous
The woman sounds stressed. You may not agree that her DC's acceptance to a "Big 3" private school is worth being stressed out over, but that doesn't change the fact that she is stressed and therefore needs a way to work it out. Since talking to her husband clearly isn't an option (as he's unwilling to even discuss the WEATHER with her) then the gym seems like a healthy way to unload some of it. Sure, she could probably indulge in drugs or alcohol for stress relief, but a lot of mentally well-balanced people seem to agree that getting some physical exercise is key to their well-being. |
Anonymous
Get real. A guy who has "resorted to limiting any discussions - even about the weather - until early March" isn't going to all of a sudden open up in any meaningful way in counseling, even if he could be persuaded to go. Could he use some counseling? Oh, hell yes! But if WEATHER is controversial for him it could take months just to get him to have a conversation about sports or current events. She needs an outlet. (And quite possibly an anti-depressant.) |
Anonymous
| I think this has to be a joke. Maybe it's a plot line on Desperate Housewives or something. |
Anonymous
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No wonder your poor wife is stressed out, with a husband who has pledged not to discuss anything with her until mid-March. This must be a joke. |
Anonymous
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Good god. They guy takes the time to come to this snake pit to ask a question about how to help his wife deal with some school stress, and in less than three hours, he's been analyzed and criticized repeatedly, told he needs to seek marriage counseling, and then told he is too horrible to his wife to even benefit from marriage counseling. And for all that, I count only one constructive response ("call the school") -- perhaps two constructive ones if you count "exercise more" but that suggestion was wrapped in invective, so it's hard to give it full credit.
By the way, I'm pretty sure OP was exaggerating in an effort at low-key humor when he suggested they can't even talk about the weather. I think some people here need to turn down the music a little bit. |
Anonymous
It sounds like you and your wife are a pair of wackos. Hubby, the bigger concern for you is what's to happen in 2 weeks after wifey bites open the magic envelope and your son doesn't get in to Sidwell. |
Anonymous
You sound like the wacko. Dad wrote a funny post about stress. Sorry it's bringing to the fore so many painful memories for you, and you need to lash our. |
Anonymous
Desperate Housewives . . . funny BTW, is that on tonight? |
Anonymous
| Your wife is not alone. There are lots of moms and dads experiencing the same stress right now...contrary to what PP's may have said. Your wife's stress is related to wanting the very best education that she believes that your child can get. There is alot of competition for the few spaces that these schools have. The stress will not be relieved until an acceptance letter comes. Remember that her stress is based on an overall commitment to her family, go easy on her, and maybe start planning for a plan B in case things dont go well. Good Luck! Hope you get the space that your family wants for your DS. |
Anonymous
If your child is in a Big 3 now, you and your wife really need to chill out. Your son, barring any red flags in testing or discpline, will get in. For the rest of us, there's valium, gin, and/or lots of shopping. |
Anonymous
| There's a leg up, sure. But siblings aren't guaranteed admission, especially when there are more siblings/alumni/faculty kids applying than there are spots available. The math just doesn't work sometime, so someone is bound to be waitlisted or rejected. |