Coworker with longer commute

[Anonymous]

I work in a team-based work environment. One of my teammates and I work on the exact same projects, so we rely on each other to each do our share of the work. We generally get along well.

I am lucky enough to have a 15 minute commute and her commute takes 45-60 minutes. She carpools with her spouse (they don't work in the same location) most days. We both have kids at home.

The thing that's starting to bother me is that she doesn't stay one minute past the contracted end of the day, even when there is still work to be done. Since a lot of our work is time-sensitive, I end up staying past my contracted day to get it done. I still get home mostly at a reasonable hour, but I'm starting to feel a little annoyed because the easy commute is the primary reason I've stayed at this work location so long ( there are many cons), but I'm feeling like I don't get to reap the benefits because I stay late to get everything prepared for the next day. Some days when we have a ton to do she apologizes for leaving and says she'll be in early the next day but then inevitably gets stuck in traffic in the morning.

I understand that I'm very lucky to have the commute I do, and I'm sure I'll hear from the people with ridiculous commutes who will say I just don't understand, and maybe I don't, but I'm starting to resent how my share of the work is larger than hers when we have the exact same position and responsibilities. I've always shared all of my resources but find myself keeping some things just for me since I'm doing the majority of the legwork.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you handle it? Please, no snarky responses. This isn't the worst problem to have and I do have perspective on that, but it's becoming an issue for me.

[Anonymous]

If she's commuting with a spouse why can't she work while he drives? Or take the work with her and do it later in the evening?

It sounds like she's taking advantage because she knows you'll stay and finish the work. What has she said when you've previously brought this up?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If she's commuting with a spouse why can't she work while he drives? Or take the work with her and do it later in the evening?

It sounds like she's taking advantage because she knows you'll stay and finish the work. What has she said when you've previously brought this up?

These are good questions. I think you're being taken advantage of. You need to address it.

If it doesn't change and there's time sensitive work to be finished that she promises to do the next day. Say "That's great. Let me just send this email to the boss letting him/her know you'll be doing that." And walk out the door with her.

[Anonymous]

I think you guys need to divvy up responsibilities with the time sensitive work in a way that feels about 50/50 to you both. She can do it by coming in early, by staying late, or by working from home, but she shouldn't get out of it. I would leave when the stuff you've agreed to is done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If she's commuting with a spouse why can't she work while he drives? Or take the work with her and do it later in the evening?

It sounds like she's taking advantage because she knows you'll stay and finish the work. What has she said when you've previously brought this up?

These are good questions. I think you're being taken advantage of. You need to address it.

If it doesn't change and there's time sensitive work to be finished that she promises to do the next day. Say "That's great. Let me just send this email to the boss letting him/her know you'll be doing that." And walk out the door with her.

OP here-- in the industry we're in it doesn't really work like that. I was trying to avoid stating my profession, as it is one that many people have uninformed opinions about and once those people start chiming in then the thread will derail. She does take her own personal work to do on the drive or at home, but it's not the stuff that needs to be done for the greater good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If she's commuting with a spouse why can't she work while he drives? Or take the work with her and do it later in the evening?

It sounds like she's taking advantage because she knows you'll stay and finish the work. What has she said when you've previously brought this up?

These are good questions. I think you're being taken advantage of. You need to address it.

If it doesn't change and there's time sensitive work to be finished that she promises to do the next day. Say "That's great. Let me just send this email to the boss letting him/her know you'll be doing that." And walk out the door with her.

OP here-- in the industry we're in it doesn't really work like that. I was trying to avoid stating my profession, as it is one that many people have uninformed opinions about and once those people start chiming in then the thread will derail. She does take her own personal work to do on the drive or at home, but it's not the stuff that needs to be done for the greater good.

I think if you want useful advice you are going to have to provide better details. If the greater good work is things that cannot be taken out of the office, then state that. Also, what have you said to her about this issue and what has been her response?

I think the second PPs suggestion of take her up on saying she'll get the work done is a decent solution.

[Anonymous]

So....she is working the hours she is contracted to work PLUS doing extra (just not on your joint project) and you are annoyed that she isn't doing extra? It sounds like she would be willing to do the joint work on the ride home or at home if she could, but since you have stated that isn't an option, I am not sure how you can fault her for that. Maybe you can find some aspects of the time sensitive stuff that can be dome remotely. When you have a carpool (even with a spouse) you have to wrap things up so you can get home (maybe to pick up kids or to avoid heavy traffic).

[Anonymous]

Can you move your start time later since you end up staying later as it is? Or move both of your arrival times to be the same?

[Anonymous]

Can you bring this up with her and ask her what she thinks is fair? Just because you live closer to work doesn't mean you are obligated to even out and make more equal how long both of your days are. Her commute and where she lives are her issue. This is her problem, and she's making it yours.

What percentage more of the work are you doing? Are there ways, as a PP suggests, to divvy it up ahead of time and then leave it to her to figure out how to finish?

[Anonymous]

Are you compensated for the extra time at all?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If she's commuting with a spouse why can't she work while he drives? Or take the work with her and do it later in the evening?

It sounds like she's taking advantage because she knows you'll stay and finish the work. What has she said when you've previously brought this up?

These are good questions. I think you're being taken advantage of. You need to address it.

If it doesn't change and there's time sensitive work to be finished that she promises to do the next day. Say "That's great. Let me just send this email to the boss letting him/her know you'll be doing that." And walk out the door with her.

OP here-- in the industry we're in it doesn't really work like that. I was trying to avoid stating my profession, as it is one that many people have uninformed opinions about and once those people start chiming in then the thread will derail. She does take her own personal work to do on the drive or at home, but it's not the stuff that needs to be done for the greater good.

I think if you want useful advice you are going to have to provide better details. If the greater good work is things that cannot be taken out of the office, then state that. Also, what have you said to her about this issue and what has been her response?

I think the second PPs suggestion of take her up on saying she'll get the work done is a decent solution.

We are teachers on the same team. I was trying to avoid saying that, seeing how another teacher-related thread derailed. The work she brings home is her own grading.

The stuff that we divide up is creating instructional resources and assessments. It's time-sensitive because we map out the unit and can't just stall if we don't have the resources ready. We divide up different content areas--like she'll plan for science and I'll plan for reading/language arts. Then we share what we came up with. We can use some stuff that's already created but most often we have to adjust the materials to differentiate for our students. The students' needs are different every year. It's time-consuming. A lot of the programs we use are only available on school computers, so it's difficult to do that stuff from home.

Then there's the business of having the materials physically ready for the kids. When the resources aren't ready on time, it's a mad dash to get copies made or to convert the resources into a flipchart or to have the materials laminated and cut out.

So basically when she doesn't have her part ready by the agreed-upon day, then I'm left to scramble or use materials that aren't as good for my students. That is what I meant about the greater good. So I stay later to make sure I have everything ready for the next day and try to get a little ahead. She comes in the next day and the resources are magically there. Then I bring home my own grading to do at home.

[Anonymous]

You need to talk with her. This is the hardest part of teaching: working with the big people. Good collaboration requires strong communication. It can be "messy" but you have to work through it. Sit her down and share your frustration. Don't accuse, just share that you're feeling overwhelmed and even taken for granted some days. Let her know that you want to work with her to figure out a solution so that the kids get the best instruction. Perhaps the two of you can pick one day a week that you'll both agree to stay later. Or you both can come in early one day. Maybe she can make arrangements with her husband to do this. Teaching is not a job where you can walk out the door every day. Clearly she has a misconception about this. The other option, OP, is to simply stop doing the extra. Let her scramble to get the things done and see the impact.

Good luck.
--Teacher and administrator for over 20 years

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to talk with her. This is the hardest part of teaching: working with the big people. Good collaboration requires strong communication. It can be "messy" but you have to work through it. Sit her down and share your frustration. Don't accuse, just share that you're feeling overwhelmed and even taken for granted some days. Let her know that you want to work with her to figure out a solution so that the kids get the best instruction. Perhaps the two of you can pick one day a week that you'll both agree to stay later. Or you both can come in early one day. Maybe she can make arrangements with her husband to do this. Teaching is not a job where you can walk out the door every day. Clearly she has a misconception about this. The other option, OP, is to simply stop doing the extra. Let her scramble to get the things done and see the impact.

Good luck.
--Teacher and administrator for over 20 years

Absolutely agree with this. Any teacher that is able to walk out the door the minute contracted hours end every day just isn't going to get the job done. Leaving at the end of contracted hours is the exception, not the rule, as unfortunate and unfair as that is for teachers. Let her know that you cannot keep planning for both of you, and that if she doesn't start picking up her portion of the work, you'll have to start planning only for yourself. At the very least, when she leaves you to scramble for resources, don't pull additional resources for her!!

[Anonymous]

Why does the planning have to be joint? Can't you just each take care of your own instructional planning and materials?

You aren't her boss, so you really have no place trying to manage her.

If the situation isn't working for you, then you need to go to an administrator and say that it is not working. Don't mention the commuting thing because that is irrelevant. Don't even mention what time she leaves every day, because that is irrelevant.

It isn't your job to police her hours worked. It is your job to meet your requirements, and if you are having difficulty doing that, then you need to tell the administrator that the joint/team relationship is not working for you.

It's possible that she is fine with the work that gets done. Maybe she has different standards/expectations. Maybe she thinks that you go too far beyond what is required.

And what is meant by the "contracted" hours? I think you are giving other PPs the impression that this other teacher leaves exactly when the students go home, but I'm guessing that isn't the case, that she still stays past when they go home but just not as late as you do (or leaves at a regular time).

[Anonymous]

You sound like you are not being fair. She is working, fulling her contract but just not up to your standard. She probably need to get home if she has child care issues, or homework/dinner/activities and bath. Plus, if she is commuting in with her husband, its not like they can split shift who takes the kids. If she were slacking off, its one thing, but she is doing work on her commute or at home, its just not the work you want her to do. You can talk to her, but you will probably piss her off and make things worse rather than better. Maybe you can shift the workload so she is assigned things she can do on the commute or at home rather than at school. You are not being reasonable to expect her to stay past her hours when she has kids and lives that far away.