I was so close and now I’m shut out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think some time away from this board might serve you well. This board can make people feel like failures if they can't afford a beautiful SFH in Bethesda or Chevy Chase. The truth is, most people can't. There are tons of people in a similar situation as you (including me) who are extremely frustrated right now by how dramatically housing prices have increased in the past few years as they were saving to buy for the first time or trade up. The only thing you can really do is figure out a path forward and try to stop thinking about what could have been. I am not that great at it myself, but I have reached a point of some peace with the situation and how to proceed moving forward. I can't say I don't think about what could have been, but I try not to obsess over it.

Thanks. I guess it’s hard because nearly everyone of my peers has what I always wanted and it’s constantly shoved in my and my kids’ faces and I feel like I have failed. I did fail.

Are you a real person? You failed because you don't own a $1.5M house in Bethesda? And how exactly is it shoved in your face? By the mere existence of your peers?

OP is a troll. The world she describes doesn’t exist. If OP were real she’d buy a house she can afford like every other homebuyer.

DP. I think everyone responding to OP like this a troll and a sociopath. So many posters on DCUM want houses of the same cost as what OP wants. They are desperate for them. They complain they are having a "freak out" over low inventory..OP is a person who saved for a long time for something she wants, and now can't have it. So many of us have been there. It's a horrible feeling. For us it was a house in a neighborhood where you could get a livable SFH for $500k in 2019. Same model house in worse condition worse lot, went for over $600k in 2021. We felt awful. We did end up compromising and getting a townhouse. We're very happy with our home now.

When close friends with more money had rough experiences 2022 to find their $900k and $2 million homes, did I say "stop complaining, you are so privileged, you can't possibly be real"? No, because I'm not a sociopath and am capable of empathy.

OP, just ignore these fools. They cannot possibly be real people.

Are you kidding me? OP says she's a failure because, like 99% of Americans, she can't afford a large house in Bethesda and she feels her peers 'shove that in her face' (presumably by merely owning a nice home). If she really feels this way, complaining publicly isn't really a smart move. It's tone deaf---she wants people to commiserate with her because she's only well off and UMC and not rich.

[Anonymous]

OP, what about this one?

https://www.redfin.com/VA/Arlington/1019-N-Kensington-St-22205/home/101388751

[Anonymous]

Or this one if you want a SFH? It's small, but since you are single and probably kids are leaving for college soon, it's big enough. And has a yard:

https://www.redfin.com/VA/Arlington/3807-6th-St-S-22204/home/11260730

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think some time away from this board might serve you well. This board can make people feel like failures if they can't afford a beautiful SFH in Bethesda or Chevy Chase. The truth is, most people can't. There are tons of people in a similar situation as you (including me) who are extremely frustrated right now by how dramatically housing prices have increased in the past few years as they were saving to buy for the first time or trade up. The only thing you can really do is figure out a path forward and try to stop thinking about what could have been. I am not that great at it myself, but I have reached a point of some peace with the situation and how to proceed moving forward. I can't say I don't think about what could have been, but I try not to obsess over it.

Thanks. I guess it’s hard because nearly everyone of my peers has what I always wanted and it’s constantly shoved in my and my kids’ faces and I feel like I have failed. I did fail.

Are you a real person? You failed because you don't own a $1.5M house in Bethesda? And how exactly is it shoved in your face? By the mere existence of your peers?

OP is a troll. The world she describes doesn’t exist. If OP were real she’d buy a house she can afford like every other homebuyer.

DP. I think everyone responding to OP like this a troll and a sociopath. So many posters on DCUM want houses of the same cost as what OP wants. They are desperate for them. They complain they are having a "freak out" over low inventory..OP is a person who saved for a long time for something she wants, and now can't have it. So many of us have been there. It's a horrible feeling. For us it was a house in a neighborhood where you could get a livable SFH for $500k in 2019. Same model house in worse condition worse lot, went for over $600k in 2021. We felt awful. We did end up compromising and getting a townhouse. We're very happy with our home now.

When close friends with more money had rough experiences 2022 to find their $900k and $2 million homes, did I say "stop complaining, you are so privileged, you can't possibly be real"? No, because I'm not a sociopath and am capable of empathy.

OP, just ignore these fools. They cannot possibly be real people.

OP is a single mom who says she could have afforded a $1.7M home by herself with 3% interest rates. The monthly payment for a house that expensive, even back then, was probably around $8,000-$10,000 a month. So OP is probably making around $300,000 or more to even think of that purchase.

So, to you, people are sociopaths because they’re a little taken aback that a rich lady, by any standard, is complaining that she can’t afford a $1.7M house anymore. Are you trolling as well? You don’t see the hubris it takes to fish for empathy from strangers when you’re such an incredibly privileged person because you can’t afford a $1.7M house anymore BY YOURSELF?!

Here’s a charming colonial in Bethesda for less than $900,000 with what appears to be a Wolf range. Maybe OP can “settle” and get a house like this, which is a nicer home than an overwhelming majority of people in this area can even think of affording with a partner, let alone by themselves, in an outstanding school district.

https://www.redfin.com/MD/Bethesda/5906-Roosevelt-St-20817/home/10662235


I

[Anonymous]

Stop being such jerks. Quite frankly!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think some time away from this board might serve you well. This board can make people feel like failures if they can't afford a beautiful SFH in Bethesda or Chevy Chase. The truth is, most people can't. There are tons of people in a similar situation as you (including me) who are extremely frustrated right now by how dramatically housing prices have increased in the past few years as they were saving to buy for the first time or trade up. The only thing you can really do is figure out a path forward and try to stop thinking about what could have been. I am not that great at it myself, but I have reached a point of some peace with the situation and how to proceed moving forward. I can't say I don't think about what could have been, but I try not to obsess over it.

Thanks. I guess it’s hard because nearly everyone of my peers has what I always wanted and it’s constantly shoved in my and my kids’ faces and I feel like I have failed. I did fail.

Are you a real person? You failed because you don't own a $1.5M house in Bethesda? And how exactly is it shoved in your face? By the mere existence of your peers?

OP is a troll. The world she describes doesn’t exist. If OP were real she’d buy a house she can afford like every other homebuyer.

DP. I think everyone responding to OP like this a troll and a sociopath. So many posters on DCUM want houses of the same cost as what OP wants. They are desperate for them. They complain they are having a "freak out" over low inventory..OP is a person who saved for a long time for something she wants, and now can't have it. So many of us have been there. It's a horrible feeling. For us it was a house in a neighborhood where you could get a livable SFH for $500k in 2019. Same model house in worse condition worse lot, went for over $600k in 2021. We felt awful. We did end up compromising and getting a townhouse. We're very happy with our home now.

When close friends with more money had rough experiences 2022 to find their $900k and $2 million homes, did I say "stop complaining, you are so privileged, you can't possibly be real"? No, because I'm not a sociopath and am capable of empathy.

OP, just ignore these fools. They cannot possibly be real people.

OP is a single mom who says she could have afforded a $1.7M home by herself with 3% interest rates. The monthly payment for a house that expensive, even back then, was probably around $8,000-$10,000 a month. So OP is probably making around $300,000 or more to even think of that purchase.

So, to you, people are sociopaths because they’re a little taken aback that a rich lady, by any standard, is complaining that she can’t afford a $1.7M house anymore. Are you trolling as well? You don’t see the hubris it takes to fish for empathy from strangers when you’re such an incredibly privileged person because you can’t afford a $1.7M house anymore BY YOURSELF?!

Here’s a charming colonial in Bethesda for less than $900,000 with what appears to be a Wolf range. Maybe OP can “settle” and get a house like this, which is a nicer home than an overwhelming majority of people in this area can even think of affording with a partner, let alone by themselves, in an outstanding school district.

https://www.redfin.com/MD/Bethesda/5906-Roosevelt-St-20817/home/10662235


I

Wow, that’s a great house! And affordable for OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here and I can’t believe th lack of reading comprehension here. Nowhere did I say I want to saddle myself with a 1.7M house or even 1.3M. That’s exactly the point! I can’t do that and won’t do that, but I could have had that’s EXACT SAME HOUSE and all the advantages that come with it, had I bought it at 1.1-1.2 2-3 years ago. That is the point. The exact same thing is suddenly no longer accessible to people who have saved and denied themselves literally their entire adult life to get it, only to see it slip away forever.

OP what is your current budget?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, what about this one?

https://www.redfin.com/VA/Arlington/1019-N-Kensington-St-22205/home/101388751

Whoa I love the cool upstairs space with a fireplace that opens to the patio. That would be such a cool teenager hangout space.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and I can’t believe th lack of reading comprehension here. Nowhere did I say I want to saddle myself with a 1.7M house or even 1.3M. That’s exactly the point! I can’t do that and won’t do that, but I could have had that’s EXACT SAME HOUSE and all the advantages that come with it, had I bought it at 1.1-1.2 2-3 years ago. That is the point. The exact same thing is suddenly no longer accessible to people who have saved and denied themselves literally their entire adult life to get it, only to see it slip away forever.

OP, just wondering why you weren't able to buy back then? It sounds like this was a really important goal for you. What happened? Did you make offers but lost out to others? Were you waiting for a house in a particular neighborhood/school district and none came open?

does it really matter? OP is where she is now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think some time away from this board might serve you well. This board can make people feel like failures if they can't afford a beautiful SFH in Bethesda or Chevy Chase. The truth is, most people can't. There are tons of people in a similar situation as you (including me) who are extremely frustrated right now by how dramatically housing prices have increased in the past few years as they were saving to buy for the first time or trade up. The only thing you can really do is figure out a path forward and try to stop thinking about what could have been. I am not that great at it myself, but I have reached a point of some peace with the situation and how to proceed moving forward. I can't say I don't think about what could have been, but I try not to obsess over it.

Thanks. I guess it’s hard because nearly everyone of my peers has what I always wanted and it’s constantly shoved in my and my kids’ faces and I feel like I have failed. I did fail.

Are you a real person? You failed because you don't own a $1.5M house in Bethesda? And how exactly is it shoved in your face? By the mere existence of your peers?

OP is a troll. The world she describes doesn’t exist. If OP were real she’d buy a house she can afford like every other homebuyer.

DP. I think everyone responding to OP like this a troll and a sociopath. So many posters on DCUM want houses of the same cost as what OP wants. They are desperate for them. They complain they are having a "freak out" over low inventory..OP is a person who saved for a long time for something she wants, and now can't have it. So many of us have been there. It's a horrible feeling. For us it was a house in a neighborhood where you could get a livable SFH for $500k in 2019. Same model house in worse condition worse lot, went for over $600k in 2021. We felt awful. We did end up compromising and getting a townhouse. We're very happy with our home now.

When close friends with more money had rough experiences 2022 to find their $900k and $2 million homes, did I say "stop complaining, you are so privileged, you can't possibly be real"? No, because I'm not a sociopath and am capable of empathy.

OP, just ignore these fools. They cannot possibly be real people.

OP is a single mom who says she could have afforded a $1.7M home by herself with 3% interest rates. The monthly payment for a house that expensive, even back then, was probably around $8,000-$10,000 a month. So OP is probably making around $300,000 or more to even think of that purchase.

So, to you, people are sociopaths because they’re a little taken aback that a rich lady, by any standard, is complaining that she can’t afford a $1.7M house anymore. Are you trolling as well? You don’t see the hubris it takes to fish for empathy from strangers when you’re such an incredibly privileged person because you can’t afford a $1.7M house anymore BY YOURSELF?!

Here’s a charming colonial in Bethesda for less than $900,000 with what appears to be a Wolf range. Maybe OP can “settle” and get a house like this, which is a nicer home than an overwhelming majority of people in this area can even think of affording with a partner, let alone by themselves, in an outstanding school district.

https://www.redfin.com/MD/Bethesda/5906-Roosevelt-St-20817/home/10662235


I

NP. To be fair she said she could afford the $1.2m house at 3%. Those houses are now allegedly worth $1.7 (I somehow doubt this, even here in N Arlington homes aren’t up over 40% since rates have gone up. So she cannot afford the $1.7m house. I’m guessing her budget is now more like 900k, which can still get a cute place (some posters have shared links). And if rates go down she can refi and live well below her means still in a decent place. It just won’t be the really nice houses selling for $1.7m today. But considering the vast majority of us can’t afford those $1.7m houses either it’s still hard to feel sympathy for someone who says she’ll never be part of the UMC (I think the irksome part of her post was trying to drum up pity as if she is so less fortunate than others). It is crummy that rates shot up so much, but she needs perspective if she thinks she’s not UMC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and I can’t believe th lack of reading comprehension here. Nowhere did I say I want to saddle myself with a 1.7M house or even 1.3M. That’s exactly the point! I can’t do that and won’t do that, but I could have had that’s EXACT SAME HOUSE and all the advantages that come with it, had I bought it at 1.1-1.2 2-3 years ago. That is the point. The exact same thing is suddenly no longer accessible to people who have saved and denied themselves literally their entire adult life to get it, only to see it slip away forever.

OP, just wondering why you weren't able to buy back then? It sounds like this was a really important goal for you. What happened? Did you make offers but lost out to others? Were you waiting for a house in a particular neighborhood/school district and none came open?

does it really matter? OP is where she is now.

To find another reason the bash someone online, since that gives people so much pleasure, of course!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here and I can’t believe th lack of reading comprehension here. Nowhere did I say I want to saddle myself with a 1.7M house or even 1.3M. That’s exactly the point! I can’t do that and won’t do that, but I could have had that’s EXACT SAME HOUSE and all the advantages that come with it, had I bought it at 1.1-1.2 2-3 years ago. That is the point. The exact same thing is suddenly no longer accessible to people who have saved and denied themselves literally their entire adult life to get it, only to see it slip away forever.

So, you're upset that homes appreciate? Yes, I understand it was a quick appreciation but this happens. Who could foresee and pandemic and isanely low mortgage rates? You should have jumped on it. You didn't because you couldn't. Ok. You missed out on an opprtunity. It happens. A lot. To a lot of people. You're not special. Find what you can afford. NOW.

You're not "shut out". You're a cry baby. Yes, you may never be able to buy a $1M+ home in this lifetime. OK. Look elsewhere or look at a lower price range.

Could've, would've, should've. It doesn't make sense to beat yourself up over it. You're allowed to be disappointed but there's lots out there, you're just being stubborn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and I can’t believe th lack of reading comprehension here. Nowhere did I say I want to saddle myself with a 1.7M house or even 1.3M. That’s exactly the point! I can’t do that and won’t do that, but I could have had that’s EXACT SAME HOUSE and all the advantages that come with it, had I bought it at 1.1-1.2 2-3 years ago. That is the point. The exact same thing is suddenly no longer accessible to people who have saved and denied themselves literally their entire adult life to get it, only to see it slip away forever.

OP, just wondering why you weren't able to buy back then? It sounds like this was a really important goal for you. What happened? Did you make offers but lost out to others? Were you waiting for a house in a particular neighborhood/school district and none came open?

does it really matter? OP is where she is now.

To find another reason the bash someone online, since that gives people so much pleasure, of course!

This is what’s really happened here. Those of you whining that you can’t have empathy because most people can’t have that live nowhere near the DMV and have no idea what’s happened in the past three years in real estate here. Yes, some places have gone up that much. And the interest rate doubled.

And where I lived before, only the UMC lived in homes over $400,000 so it’s rich to see so many of you in your $300,000 and $700,000 homes feel insulted and insult her as privileged. What a bunch of self-centered, unaware trolls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and I can’t believe th lack of reading comprehension here. Nowhere did I say I want to saddle myself with a 1.7M house or even 1.3M. That’s exactly the point! I can’t do that and won’t do that, but I could have had that’s EXACT SAME HOUSE and all the advantages that come with it, had I bought it at 1.1-1.2 2-3 years ago. That is the point. The exact same thing is suddenly no longer accessible to people who have saved and denied themselves literally their entire adult life to get it, only to see it slip away forever.

So, you're upset that homes appreciate? Yes, I understand it was a quick appreciation but this happens. Who could foresee and pandemic and isanely low mortgage rates? You should have jumped on it. You didn't because you couldn't. Ok. You missed out on an opprtunity. It happens. A lot. To a lot of people. You're not special. Find what you can afford. NOW.

You're not "shut out". You're a cry baby. Yes, you may never be able to buy a $1M+ home in this lifetime. OK. Look elsewhere or look at a lower price range.

Could've, would've, should've. It doesn't make sense to beat yourself up over it. You're allowed to be disappointed but there's lots out there, you're just being stubborn.

DP you are a complete and utter a-hole. I hope typing this garbage made you feel good about yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and I can’t believe th lack of reading comprehension here. Nowhere did I say I want to saddle myself with a 1.7M house or even 1.3M. That’s exactly the point! I can’t do that and won’t do that, but I could have had that’s EXACT SAME HOUSE and all the advantages that come with it, had I bought it at 1.1-1.2 2-3 years ago. That is the point. The exact same thing is suddenly no longer accessible to people who have saved and denied themselves literally their entire adult life to get it, only to see it slip away forever.

OP, just wondering why you weren't able to buy back then? It sounds like this was a really important goal for you. What happened? Did you make offers but lost out to others? Were you waiting for a house in a particular neighborhood/school district and none came open?

does it really matter? OP is where she is now.

To find another reason the bash someone online, since that gives people so much pleasure, of course!

This is what’s really happened here. Those of you whining that you can’t have empathy because most people can’t have that live nowhere near the DMV and have no idea what’s happened in the past three years in real estate here. Yes, some places have gone up that much. And the interest rate doubled.

And where I lived before, only the UMC lived in homes over $400,000 so it’s rich to see so many of you in your $300,000 and $700,000 homes feel insulted and insult her as privileged. What a bunch of self-centered, unaware trolls.

+1 this thread is a bunch of really privileged people getting upset and offended because someone else might be marginally more privileged than they are