Advice for dating a friend I met at a Meet Up

[Anonymous]

I met a great guy six months ago at a Meet Up, not intended for singles. We are both single, no kids, and we are one year apart in age. I've never been married and he was married for 16 years, but has been divorced for 5 years.

I was attracted to him at the first Meet Up. He was pursuing a long distance relationship with another woman at the time. He brought her to one of the Meet Ups. It didn't work out.

We were alone for the first time last week. We had great conversation and kissed and made out a for bit. The chemistry was definitely there. That was Saturday. I have only received a text message from him since that time.

I don't attend the Meet Ups regularly.

Since I am the woman, am I left to just wait for this great guy to ask me out on an official date? Any advice?

[Anonymous]

Mm just ask him

[Anonymous]

You made out on Saturday and have only had a text message from him since then.

He's...thinking it over.

This could take a while. You might as well just ask him out. That will make him "p*ss or get off the pot".

[Anonymous]

Hell no, you don't have to wait for him to ask you out, but he's probably going to. If you want to ask him out it's fine. You guys have already broken the ice already.

Sounds wonderful. I'm a sucker for a new romance. Way to go, OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hell no, you don't have to wait for him to ask you out, but he's probably going to. If you want to ask him out it's fine. You guys have already broken the ice already.

Sounds wonderful. I'm a sucker for a new romance. Way to go, OP!

Thanks. I am having a difficult time finding a way to see him again outside of the Meet Up that doesn't put him on the spot.

[Anonymous]

During this make out session was he drunk?

If so, chances are he is questioning his feelings.

If not, he may be in the same position as you; "When should I contact her next?"..."When is too soon?"...."Am I already too late?".

If you want to see him again outside of a Meet Up, give him a call, send him a text, etc. and tell him.

This isn't the 1950s anymore. Women can approach men too

[Anonymous]

Well if you want to see him again, but don't want to seem too pushy or aggressive or anything, why not start attending the meet-ups on a regular basis to see if he is there? If so, then you can see how he reacts to you and how things go from there. Hopefully he will be happy to see you and things will proceed nicely from there on.

However, if he has only texted you once since you last saw him, that doesn't look too good to me from here.
I mean, if a guy is really into you, he would have contacted you more. Maybe he either is seeing someone else or he doesn't really like you as much as you like him.

If he isn't at the meet-ups and you really need closure to see how he feels about you, then go ahead and call/text him and see how he responds. This should give you the answer you have been looking for.

Keeping my fingers crossed for the outcome you want!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We were alone for the first time last week. We had great conversation and kissed and made out a for bit. The chemistry was definitely there.

After you kissed and made out, you want to know if you have permission to contact him? I don't want to beat up on you, but really? really??

Please contact him if you want to see him some more.

- signed, a guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well if you want to see him again, but don't want to seem too pushy or aggressive or anything, why not start attending the meet-ups on a regular basis to see if he is there? If so, then you can see how he reacts to you and how things go from there. Hopefully he will be happy to see you and things will proceed nicely from there on.

However, if he has only texted you once since you last saw him, that doesn't look too good to me from here.
I mean, if a guy is really into you, he would have contacted you more. Maybe he either is seeing someone else or he doesn't really like you as much as you like him.

If he isn't at the meet-ups and you really need closure to see how he feels about you, then go ahead and call/text him and see how he responds. This should give you the answer you have been looking for.

Keeping my fingers crossed for the outcome you want!

He organizes the Meet Up, so he is usually there.

If I attend the Meet Ups regularly, he will get used to seeing me there, and he won't have any incentive to spend time with me alone. He told me I was pretty Saturday, and we weren't drunk. I get the feeling he doesn't want to "hit on me" in an obvious way at the Meet Ups. We have pictures of ourselves hanging out together and doing fun stuff. He really is a great guy. And handsome. I feel he should call and ask me for a date!

[Anonymous]

I don't see it the same way, OP, about him not having incentive to see you alone if you regularly attend the meet up. You'll have the chance to flirt, get to know each other, and even establish a nice friendship which is always the best foundation for a relationship. I think you would have a better chance of connecting with him in a way that has future potential (making out at a bar is fun but more about the purely physical attraction). You know there is a mutual attraction, which is great, so I really think going to the meet ups is a more promising beginning, especially since he hasn't pursued anything further just yet.

[Anonymous]

It's only Wednesday.

I'd give it till next weds or Thursday, then ask him out if you want.

[Anonymous]

Why can't you get in touch with him and ask him if he wants to get together?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well if you want to see him again, but don't want to seem too pushy or aggressive or anything, why not start attending the meet-ups on a regular basis to see if he is there? If so, then you can see how he reacts to you and how things go from there. Hopefully he will be happy to see you and things will proceed nicely from there on.

However, if he has only texted you once since you last saw him, that doesn't look too good to me from here.
I mean, if a guy is really into you, he would have contacted you more. Maybe he either is seeing someone else or he doesn't really like you as much as you like him.

If he isn't at the meet-ups and you really need closure to see how he feels about you, then go ahead and call/text him and see how he responds. This should give you the answer you have been looking for.

Keeping my fingers crossed for the outcome you want!

He organizes the Meet Up, so he is usually there.

If I attend the Meet Ups regularly, he will get used to seeing me there, and he won't have any incentive to spend time with me alone. He told me I was pretty Saturday, and we weren't drunk. I get the feeling he doesn't want to "hit on me" in an obvious way at the Meet Ups. We have pictures of ourselves hanging out together and doing fun stuff. He really is a great guy. And handsome. I feel he should call and ask me for a date!

And with attitude, you are likely to remain single.

[Anonymous]

It's also possible he's not asking you out because he expects to see you at the meet-up and prefers connecting that way. And he just may want to take whatever it is slow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well if you want to see him again, but don't want to seem too pushy or aggressive or anything, why not start attending the meet-ups on a regular basis to see if he is there? If so, then you can see how he reacts to you and how things go from there. Hopefully he will be happy to see you and things will proceed nicely from there on.

However, if he has only texted you once since you last saw him, that doesn't look too good to me from here.
I mean, if a guy is really into you, he would have contacted you more. Maybe he either is seeing someone else or he doesn't really like you as much as you like him.

If he isn't at the meet-ups and you really need closure to see how he feels about you, then go ahead and call/text him and see how he responds. This should give you the answer you have been looking for.

Keeping my fingers crossed for the outcome you want!

He organizes the Meet Up, so he is usually there.

If I attend the Meet Ups regularly, he will get used to seeing me there, and he won't have any incentive to spend time with me alone. He told me I was pretty Saturday, and we weren't drunk. I get the feeling he doesn't want to "hit on me" in an obvious way at the Meet Ups. We have pictures of ourselves hanging out together and doing fun stuff. He really is a great guy. And handsome. I feel he should call and ask me for a date!

And with attitude, you are likely to remain single.

What attitude?