| I just received a voicemail from a place I interviewed with two weeks ago, saying that they have good news. I haven't called them back yet (they called half an hour ago) and I'm assuming that its a job offer. Problem is that I'm 5 months pregnant and would like three months of unpaid maternity leave. I know I wouldn't be covered by the FMLA because the company only has 12 employees and of course I wouldn't have worked there for the required amount of time. How should I approach this? I feel awkward telling them this on the phone when I call back. Should I ask to meet with them and tell them then? There is nothing else to discuss since the salary is set and I told them I'd be able to start three weeks after I get the offer. |
| Hear them out over the phone (call them back), get a written offer by email or snail mail, and don't make any commitments - just tell them you'd like some time to review the offer. Then, write a letter asking what you want and giving some good reasons why you think you deserve it. Wait for their response. |
| I think it would be easier to have the discussion over the phone. Meeting with them seems awkward for everyone and writing a letter seems too formal. It's really not a big deal what you're asking for and either they're willing to work with you or they're not. |
Unless you have incredibly rare and critical skills I don't think your job would be held for you if you try to take that much time off. 6 weeks medical leave is more likely. Otherwise you work for 3-4 months then take 3 months off? |
Agreed. It's shame that the US is like this, but this is a small company. They can't afford to have you out for that much time after being there for only 3-4 months. Negotiate 6 to 8 weeks of unpaid leave. TBH, I think you're lucky if you get that. It all really depends on how badly you need this job. |
Just happened exactly that way for me- job interview at 25 weeks, offer the next Monday, work by Wednesday. Off for 3 months after baby born on due date. I'm not special, but the organization was looking for the long-term and liked me in that capacity. |
| Thanks everyone for the advice. It's seems like they are out for a conference today so no one has called me back. I'm still contemplating over what to do and how to approach the issue. I would take the job regardless but I still would ideally want to take 3 months off. What do you think of asking for 12 but telling them that I understand if that's not possible. Also how would I ask them for it. Do I tell them I accept your offer and would love to work for you but there is something I would like to talk about and take it from there? What would you suggest? |
Ou OP again. Did you look pregnant at the interview? Also how small is your company? |
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I was going to say - if you were in 2 weeks ago, and are 5 months PG, clearly they are expecting you to take some leave. If there are any number of women at company, they might not be surprised to hear you say you want to take 12 weeks.
My .02 |
| OP - I think that you have gotten some really bad advice here. It is exactly this type of attitude that makes women less valued in the workplace. They want you for the job. Great. Congratulations! You are also a person with obligations outside of work, and any company interviewing/hiring a woman of childbearing age knows that that woman getting pregnant is possible, if not likely. So, get the offer in writing (email or letter), then explain - over the phone is fine - that you would like to accept the offer and (NOT but) you are pregnant, due xxx date. Then say that you would like to take 12 weeks off, starting at xxx date and that you understand the leave will be unpaid. Then see what they say. Don't immediately offer to take less than 12 weeks, that makes you look weak and hurts woman everywhere. If you are willing to take less than 12 weeks (and you do not have to be) and they ask you to do so, you can negotiate from there. But the biggest mistake women make when negotiating the details of a new job or a promotion is asking for less than they want or offering to take less than you want. You may get to less than 12 weeks through negotiation, but there is no need for you to go in with less. Let them make that ask. |
OP again. Unless they are really observant they wouldn't be able to tell. My suit covered my belly well (which was tiny at that time anyways). |
| Also check www.askamanager.org and run a search on "maternity leave" or "pregnancy." She always has awesome advice. And there's an open forum on her site today so you can post your question. |
I was interviewed in 2 panels- so 8 people total. My immediate supervisor said it was very obvious I was pregnant. To me it definitely was. After the fact 3-4 said they didn't know, but one said she wasn't sure. I attended a 3rd day of meetings that week (yes, 3 in one week) before the official offer where I was definitely much more obvious than in a suit and they still called with the offer, so those 3 were clearly pretty clueless but the others were very aware I was pregnant. Its a big university, but I still didn't qualify for FMLA because of my limited time. They gave it to me anyway- unpaid. |