when elderly parents stop eating

[Anonymous]

My dad has been sick for years and has decided he doesn't want to eat anymore.
What do you do? Dr? Hospital? Let them choose?

[Anonymous]

Let them choose. I'm sorry you are going through this, but I think it's best it that he spends his lasts days where he wants. If it's at his home, then so be it. That's where I would want to be. Not in a hospital getting poked and prodded and woke up every half hour. Let me have my peace.

This must be very hard for you. Again, I'm very sorry. Just be there for him the best that you can. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let them choose. I'm sorry you are going through this, but I think it's best it that he spends his lasts days where he wants. If it's at his home, then so be it. That's where I would want to be. Not in a hospital getting poked and prodded and woke up every half hour. Let me have my peace.

This must be very hard for you. Again, I'm very sorry. Just be there for him the best that you can. Good luck.

+1

[Anonymous]

Do not send him to the hospital for his last days, unless it is what he want. Palliative care at home? My FIL came home after for the last few weeks. The palliative care team was kind and very helpful.

[Anonymous]

You respect his wishes. He wants to die. Please let him. It's a quite humane way to go. Please don't force him to eat.
This is what my grandmother did. Eventually you get to the point that you aren't even hungry anymore. Once she stopped drinking, I think the end was a few days away. I'm sorry, it's really tough to watch.

[Anonymous]

A close friend of mine just went through this with her dad. they had hospice care at home and she was trying to make him eat and the nurse told her to stop. It was very hard, but once he stopped being able to swallow ( the nurse did a test every day), he went peacefully within a very short period of time.

[Anonymous]

Respect his choice. My father went from eating a ton to eating almost nothing in his last weeks. We offered food, but never pushed it.

He found Popsicles refreshing and ate those.

[Anonymous]

Call hospice and see if they can help. I would respect his wishes and Hospice is all about that.

[Anonymous]

Let him be, but starvation takes a while. My FIL's mother was in her late 90s and she stopped eating. It took her about two weeks to pass. She died in the comfort of her own home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Call hospice and see if they can help. I would respect his wishes and Hospice is all about that.

+1 We had a wonderful experience with hospice. They took wonderful care of our family member and made it so much easier for everyone.

[Anonymous]

This is a natural way to go. I agree with popsicles. You can also get a prescription for a mouth & throat spray (often used for patients receiving radiation) that will easy dryness without artificially extending life.

[Anonymous]

I'm very sorry OP.

[Anonymous]

Let him be. My dad LOVED food. After 6 months of bad news and not being able to eat what he wanted, he decided to quit fighting. Sure, we could have kept him in the hospital on an IV, but it was better to enjoy 5 days at home with him before he passed. We even did a shot of tequila before he passed because, at that point, who gives a crap? Everyone deserves their autonomy and dignity. Quality of life was negligible for my dad, so I took a night to accept it and spent the remaining time enjoying the only quality time we've had in years.

[Anonymous]

Hospice was very helpful for us.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the feedback, I needed some thoughts from others who are not in the moment of it as I am