Who is right? Son accidentally took item - disagreement results

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are you old hags who think that 10PM is the middle of the night? On a Friday. Your lives sound boring as hell.

This is a parenting site, asshole.

I'm a Mom of 4. You ladies sound pathetic considering 10PM the middle of the night on a Friday.

You think nothing of loading your 4 kids into the car at 10 to drive an hour? I haven't reached that level of zen yet.

If it was to correct a wrong, absolutely. A hour-long round trip is not bad. You people are overly dramatic over this 30 minute drive to meet the Mom. But, of course, you think 10PM is the middle of the night.

If the drive was inconvenient, I would have arranged an uber drop-off. To do nothing was not cool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know I'm late to the party but I read all 24 pages! I am another on Team OP. I get that her kid screwed up, but the bathing suit mom is really asking way too much. If I were leaving on a beach trip and only had one suit for my child, I would put the fear of death into him of not coming home with the correct suit. Then I would have checked immediately on return. I have a 7 year old, too, and with a few reminders, he can be really careful. I also would have that suit labeled. And on the off chance that something did go awry, I just wouldn't rake the other mother over the coals to fix it. Sure, if the parent could bring it by that night, that would be awesome. But otherwise I could probably find 25 bathing suits just by calling a few friends or posting on a neighborhood or school listserv and letting people know we were in a bind because our suit got misplaced at a party. And really, every parent has had to deal with lost or missing stuff, no?

This wasn't the woman's son's fault, so fear of death wasn't the issue. The OP's child left first. I think the OP should've done the 30 minute drive. People at like 10 is such an ungodly hour- would she have been cruising through the streets of Anacostia? Did the woman live in Barry Farms? OP would've been inconvenienced but not ridiculously so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are you old hags who think that 10PM is the middle of the night? On a Friday. Your lives sound boring as hell.

This is a parenting site, asshole.

I'm a Mom of 4. You ladies sound pathetic considering 10PM the middle of the night on a Friday.

I don't believe that for a second. If you were a mother of 4, you would understand.

Believe what you want. This is an anonymous board and I have nothing to gain from being dishonest. IF Jeff were so inclined, my post history would verify my statement.

BTW, it's because I have 4 children that I cringe at Moms who act like invalids because they have small children. Buck up, ladies!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are you old hags who think that 10PM is the middle of the night? On a Friday. Your lives sound boring as hell.

This is a parenting site, asshole.

I'm a Mom of 4. You ladies sound pathetic considering 10PM the middle of the night on a Friday.

I don't believe that for a second. If you were a mother of 4, you would understand.

Believe what you want. This is an anonymous board and I have nothing to gain from being dishonest. IF Jeff were so inclined, my post history would verify my statement.

BTW, it's because I have 4 children that I cringe at Moms who act like invalids because they have small children. Buck up, ladies!

True, of the moms I know with 4 children, the children don't have bedtimes before 10. In that case, NBD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are you old hags who think that 10PM is the middle of the night? On a Friday. Your lives sound boring as hell.

This is a parenting site, asshole.

I'm a Mom of 4. You ladies sound pathetic considering 10PM the middle of the night on a Friday.

I don't believe that for a second. If you were a mother of 4, you would understand.

Believe what you want. This is an anonymous board and I have nothing to gain from being dishonest. IF Jeff were so inclined, my post history would verify my statement.

BTW, it's because I have 4 children that I cringe at Moms who act like invalids because they have small children. Buck up, ladies!

The bedtime of the children is irrelevant. They can sleep in the car. Or, again, send an uber if you don't want to leave the house.

True, of the moms I know with 4 children, the children don't have bedtimes before 10. In that case, NBD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I'm late to the party but I read all 24 pages! I am another on Team OP. I get that her kid screwed up, but the bathing suit mom is really asking way too much. If I were leaving on a beach trip and only had one suit for my child, I would put the fear of death into him of not coming home with the correct suit. Then I would have checked immediately on return. I have a 7 year old, too, and with a few reminders, he can be really careful. I also would have that suit labeled. And on the off chance that something did go awry, I just wouldn't rake the other mother over the coals to fix it. Sure, if the parent could bring it by that night, that would be awesome. But otherwise I could probably find 25 bathing suits just by calling a few friends or posting on a neighborhood or school listserv and letting people know we were in a bind because our suit got misplaced at a party. And really, every parent has had to deal with lost or missing stuff, no?

This wasn't the woman's son's fault, so fear of death wasn't the issue. The OP's child left first. I think the OP should've done the 30 minute drive. People at like 10 is such an ungodly hour- would she have been cruising through the streets of Anacostia? Did the woman live in Barry Farms? OP would've been inconvenienced but not ridiculously so.

No, it's not the big kid's fault, but seriously, be prepared. Shit happens. I only have 2 kids but can roll just fine if a swimsuit goes missing. I don't need some poor mom who's husband is out of town to meet me at 10 pm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are you old hags who think that 10PM is the middle of the night? On a Friday. Your lives sound boring as hell.

This is a parenting site, asshole.

I'm a Mom of 4. You ladies sound pathetic considering 10PM the middle of the night on a Friday.

I don't believe that for a second. If you were a mother of 4, you would understand.

I know a mom of 4 who says shit like this, even specifically about when is "late" or not. She's a SAHM with a full-time nanny and a housekeeper. So, yeah. Since she does only a fraction of what most parents do in a day, she just cannot fathom being at home on (gasp) a Friday, even with a baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are you old hags who think that 10PM is the middle of the night? On a Friday. Your lives sound boring as hell.

This is a parenting site, asshole.

I'm a Mom of 4. You ladies sound pathetic considering 10PM the middle of the night on a Friday.

I don't believe that for a second. If you were a mother of 4, you would understand.

I know a mom of 4 who says shit like this, even specifically about when is "late" or not. She's a SAHM with a full-time nanny and a housekeeper. So, yeah. Since she does only a fraction of what most parents do in a day, she just cannot fathom being at home on (gasp) a Friday, even with a baby.

None of what you said describes my life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I'm late to the party but I read all 24 pages! I am another on Team OP. I get that her kid screwed up, but the bathing suit mom is really asking way too much. If I were leaving on a beach trip and only had one suit for my child, I would put the fear of death into him of not coming home with the correct suit. Then I would have checked immediately on return. I have a 7 year old, too, and with a few reminders, he can be really careful. I also would have that suit labeled. And on the off chance that something did go awry, I just wouldn't rake the other mother over the coals to fix it. Sure, if the parent could bring it by that night, that would be awesome. But otherwise I could probably find 25 bathing suits just by calling a few friends or posting on a neighborhood or school listserv and letting people know we were in a bind because our suit got misplaced at a party. And really, every parent has had to deal with lost or missing stuff, no?

This wasn't the woman's son's fault, so fear of death wasn't the issue. The OP's child left first. I think the OP should've done the 30 minute drive. People at like 10 is such an ungodly hour- would she have been cruising through the streets of Anacostia? Did the woman live in Barry Farms? OP would've been inconvenienced but not ridiculously so.

No, it's not the big kid's fault, but seriously, be prepared. Shit happens. I only have 2 kids but can roll just fine if a swimsuit goes missing. I don't need some poor mom who's husband is out of town to meet me at 10 pm.

That's what you would do. And, it's probably what that Mom would do. BUT, the OP offered to drive it over and, with that offer, probably gave the impression that it was no big deal. Accepting an offer does not make you crazy or unreasonable.

It's extremely tacky to make an offer (secretly hoping it will be refused) and then taking back the offer when the person accepts!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I'm late to the party but I read all 24 pages! I am another on Team OP. I get that her kid screwed up, but the bathing suit mom is really asking way too much. If I were leaving on a beach trip and only had one suit for my child, I would put the fear of death into him of not coming home with the correct suit. Then I would have checked immediately on return. I have a 7 year old, too, and with a few reminders, he can be really careful. I also would have that suit labeled. And on the off chance that something did go awry, I just wouldn't rake the other mother over the coals to fix it. Sure, if the parent could bring it by that night, that would be awesome. But otherwise I could probably find 25 bathing suits just by calling a few friends or posting on a neighborhood or school listserv and letting people know we were in a bind because our suit got misplaced at a party. And really, every parent has had to deal with lost or missing stuff, no?

This wasn't the woman's son's fault, so fear of death wasn't the issue. The OP's child left first. I think the OP should've done the 30 minute drive. People at like 10 is such an ungodly hour- would she have been cruising through the streets of Anacostia? Did the woman live in Barry Farms? OP would've been inconvenienced but not ridiculously so.

No, it's not the big kid's fault, but seriously, be prepared. Shit happens. I only have 2 kids but can roll just fine if a swimsuit goes missing. I don't need some poor mom who's husband is out of town to meet me at 10 pm.

That's what you would do. And, it's probably what that Mom would do. BUT, the OP offered to drive it over and, with that offer, probably gave the impression that it was no big deal. Accepting an offer does not make you crazy or unreasonable.

It's extremely tacky to make an offer (secretly hoping it will be refused) and then taking back the offer when the person accepts!

This is the exchange as originally reported by OP:

I tell her I am sorry, I will bring it over in the morning. (My son left first, and picked a bathing suit off the drying rack - so he took the wrong one.) she says she needs it that evening because they leave on a trip in the morning and he only has one. I say ok, I have a sleeping baby already (DH overseas) but I will wake baby if necessary (hoping she'll say don't bother, but she doesn't )and ask for address. I map it, and it is 50 minutes away. I ask to meet at the school (10 minutes from me) and she says no. She offers a second location, 30 minutes for each of us, but only at 10 pm, and at that point I just say, look, I'm really sorry, but I can't wake sleeping baby and drive 30 minutes at 10 pm.

It is not tacky to take back an offer when it starts at, I'll bring it by in the morning, and ends at, bring it at 10pm tonight.

[Anonymous]

Why didn't you offer to bring it over in the morning before they left for their trip, OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I'm late to the party but I read all 24 pages! I am another on Team OP. I get that her kid screwed up, but the bathing suit mom is really asking way too much. If I were leaving on a beach trip and only had one suit for my child, I would put the fear of death into him of not coming home with the correct suit. Then I would have checked immediately on return. I have a 7 year old, too, and with a few reminders, he can be really careful. I also would have that suit labeled. And on the off chance that something did go awry, I just wouldn't rake the other mother over the coals to fix it. Sure, if the parent could bring it by that night, that would be awesome. But otherwise I could probably find 25 bathing suits just by calling a few friends or posting on a neighborhood or school listserv and letting people know we were in a bind because our suit got misplaced at a party. And really, every parent has had to deal with lost or missing stuff, no?

This wasn't the woman's son's fault, so fear of death wasn't the issue. The OP's child left first. I think the OP should've done the 30 minute drive. People at like 10 is such an ungodly hour- would she have been cruising through the streets of Anacostia? Did the woman live in Barry Farms? OP would've been inconvenienced but not ridiculously so.

No, it's not the big kid's fault, but seriously, be prepared. Shit happens. I only have 2 kids but can roll just fine if a swimsuit goes missing. I don't need some poor mom who's husband is out of town to meet me at 10 pm.

That's what you would do. And, it's probably what that Mom would do. BUT, the OP offered to drive it over and, with that offer, probably gave the impression that it was no big deal. Accepting an offer does not make you crazy or unreasonable.

It's extremely tacky to make an offer (secretly hoping it will be refused) and then taking back the offer when the person accepts!

This is the exchange as originally reported by OP:

I tell her I am sorry, I will bring it over in the morning. (My son left first, and picked a bathing suit off the drying rack - so he took the wrong one.) she says she needs it that evening because they leave on a trip in the morning and he only has one. I say ok, I have a sleeping baby already (DH overseas) but I will wake baby if necessary (hoping she'll say don't bother, but she doesn't )and ask for address. I map it, and it is 50 minutes away. I ask to meet at the school (10 minutes from me) and she says no. She offers a second location, 30 minutes for each of us, but only at 10 pm, and at that point I just say, look, I'm really sorry, but I can't wake sleeping baby and drive 30 minutes at 10 pm.

It is not tacky to take back an offer when it starts at, I'll bring it by in the morning, and ends at, bring it at 10pm tonight.

Yes, it is. OP could go at any time if she wanted an earlier arrangement. 10PM was if the Mom met her halfway (a more than generous compromise).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why didn't you offer to bring it over in the morning before they left for their trip, OP?

Doubt she would have done that since her objection was that the lady lived 50 minutes away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should have driven it to them. Your son took it, his mistake. It sucks but that is what you should have done.

really?

What ding-a-ling only has one suit for his/her kid?

lots of people only have one bathing suit. why does that make someone a "ding a ling"?

b/c if you're away for SEVERAL days who wants to spend time washing/rinsing a suit and waiting for it to dry? Take the dry one on day two while the wet one has time to dry!

one suit?

I found trunks at Target for $10.99.

Yes, ding-a-ling is an appropriate term to use within this context.

Bathing suits don't take that long to dry.

Ours do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who are you old hags who think that 10PM is the middle of the night? On a Friday. Your lives sound boring as hell.

We are people who will end up paying for you and your children as you sponge off the system.