Lessons learned so far: 2024-2025

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think whether he needed that science program has been, in part, answered: he was admitted ED to the school he wanted to go to. But yeah, we'll see. There's a reason why people shell out 30k for a private counselor. It's not just for their knowledge of the process, but to mediate between kids and parents. Or so I am told.

Yes, that alone was worth it. It saved both mine and my kid's sanity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it’s just my kids, but it was way more parental support than I expected. Between remembering deadlines, helping with all the admissions ways each school does things, managing visits and talking through all the highs and lows of the range of emotions, it’s just an exhausting process. I know it doesn’t have to be that way but it was for us. So glad we’re just about done.

+1 lots of support and guidance...very stressful! So glad to be almost done here too.

Same here but I’m still hooked on this process and second-guessing decisions.

[Anonymous]

I’m second guessing too and realizing none are really the right fit to include academics, price, distance, etc. When you don’t feel like you found “the one”, it’s hard not to second guess. Trying to remember that nothing is perfect and it all works out. I don’t feel my older child ended up at the right spot and he’ll likely need to come home after this year so that doesn’t help with the younger one. But we’re fortunate to have options and money set aside. There could be far bigger problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:- your school’s data or history is probably more important than you think.

- your kid needs to be memorable, especially at selective schools and the application should have a theme or narrative so that an AO can refer to you by a short phrase or tagline.

- watching results come in at our HS….major makes a HUGE difference. Example: UT OOS acceptance to Film school while all others deferred.

- start the essays as soon as school ends junior year. The best essays took months of editing and refining. And better new ideas emerged from all that writing.

- use the search function here. I found good tips and links to help my kid with the activities list.

- be prepared for deferral and WL with draft LOCI

haha! that’s crazy! My kid got in a lot of great schools and some essays he wrote on the spot. He landed at UT Austin as an OOS. He most certainly didn’t work on them for months, nor did he let us read them until after they were submitted.

[Anonymous]

I hadn't factored in the distance of the colleges my child might attend. The cost of travel back and forth can definitely add up over 4 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Agree with earlier commentators that underline how much planning goes into top 20 (or really, top 15) acceptance. For us this meant applying to selective programs for the summers between 10/11 and 11/12 grades, including an extensive application for a very selective summer science program. I put it in much more time than my son did mapping all of this out, which required a great deal of research in addition to keeping track of deadlines, recs, essays, etc. Indeed, I would say that with the essays in particular my role in shepherding all of this gave rise to real tension between my son and me, to the point where I wondered if the effort I was putting in to all of this was really worth it. I am still a bit bruised by the experience but the outcome was what we were looking for, ultimately, and it is my hope that at some point sooner rather than later my kid will understand why things had to go the way they went. It is not for the faint of heart. As a parent, I decided it was in fact worth it to do what I thought was right for my child even if our relations were, in the present, strained. There are some events in a person's life where you just have to buckle up and take responsibility for the process in spite of the bruised feelings that result, including one's own.

Sorry to me this reads more like a lesson on what not to do. No wonder these kids are growing up impotent.

[Anonymous]

Hey, do things your own way. My kid is pretty happy with where he landed. Time will tell whether investing in my kid's future was a good call.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Agree with earlier commentators that underline how much planning goes into top 20 (or really, top 15) acceptance. For us this meant applying to selective programs for the summers between 10/11 and 11/12 grades, including an extensive application for a very selective summer science program. I put it in much more time than my son did mapping all of this out, which required a great deal of research in addition to keeping track of deadlines, recs, essays, etc. Indeed, I would say that with the essays in particular my role in shepherding all of this gave rise to real tension between my son and me, to the point where I wondered if the effort I was putting in to all of this was really worth it. I am still a bit bruised by the experience but the outcome was what we were looking for, ultimately, and it is my hope that at some point sooner rather than later my kid will understand why things had to go the way they went. It is not for the faint of heart. As a parent, I decided it was in fact worth it to do what I thought was right for my child even if our relations were, in the present, strained. There are some events in a person's life where you just have to buckle up and take responsibility for the process in spite of the bruised feelings that result, including one's own.

umm ... yikes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree with earlier commentators that underline how much planning goes into top 20 (or really, top 15) acceptance. For us this meant applying to selective programs for the summers between 10/11 and 11/12 grades, including an extensive application for a very selective summer science program. I put it in much more time than my son did mapping all of this out, which required a great deal of research in addition to keeping track of deadlines, recs, essays, etc. Indeed, I would say that with the essays in particular my role in shepherding all of this gave rise to real tension between my son and me, to the point where I wondered if the effort I was putting in to all of this was really worth it. I am still a bit bruised by the experience but the outcome was what we were looking for, ultimately, and it is my hope that at some point sooner rather than later my kid will understand why things had to go the way they went. It is not for the faint of heart. As a parent, I decided it was in fact worth it to do what I thought was right for my child even if our relations were, in the present, strained. There are some events in a person's life where you just have to buckle up and take responsibility for the process in spite of the bruised feelings that result, including one's own.

umm ... yikes.

We focused on WASP schools and did none of this. Not remotely worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree with earlier commentators that underline how much planning goes into top 20 (or really, top 15) acceptance. For us this meant applying to selective programs for the summers between 10/11 and 11/12 grades, including an extensive application for a very selective summer science program. I put it in much more time than my son did mapping all of this out, which required a great deal of research in addition to keeping track of deadlines, recs, essays, etc. Indeed, I would say that with the essays in particular my role in shepherding all of this gave rise to real tension between my son and me, to the point where I wondered if the effort I was putting in to all of this was really worth it. I am still a bit bruised by the experience but the outcome was what we were looking for, ultimately, and it is my hope that at some point sooner rather than later my kid will understand why things had to go the way they went. It is not for the faint of heart. As a parent, I decided it was in fact worth it to do what I thought was right for my child even if our relations were, in the present, strained. There are some events in a person's life where you just have to buckle up and take responsibility for the process in spite of the bruised feelings that result, including one's own.

umm ... yikes.

+1000

[Anonymous]

^^^
That one poster seems to be an outlier here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Start preparing for rush spring of senior year if you want a top-tier bid. Connect with fraternities/sororities on Instagram, figure out who the top dogs in the house are, and start engaging with them. Don't be the rando rolling in during formal rush thinking your Sperrys and Southern Tide will push you to the top of the list. Build that network early!

Oh my word this is the absolute last thing I would have on the radar. Actually it won’t be anywhere near the radar.

[Anonymous]

We made the decision with our second child to make the impressions at college fairs, engage the schools, etc., but in some cases not visit until admitted.

With our first we did the big Southern loop of schools during Spring Break Junior year and he ended up applying to only one of about eight we visited. We didn’t bother with that this time around. We will visit a couple of places on admitted students day instead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Start preparing for rush spring of senior year if you want a top-tier bid. Connect with fraternities/sororities on Instagram, figure out who the top dogs in the house are, and start engaging with them. Don't be the rando rolling in during formal rush thinking your Sperrys and Southern Tide will push you to the top of the list. Build that network early!

What does this even mean?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Start preparing for rush spring of senior year if you want a top-tier bid. Connect with fraternities/sororities on Instagram, figure out who the top dogs in the house are, and start engaging with them. Don't be the rando rolling in during formal rush thinking your Sperrys and Southern Tide will push you to the top of the list. Build that network early!

What does this even mean?

It means that someone's trolling. Poorly.