in-law question -- would you be frustrated by this?

[Anonymous]

MIL frequently sends my husband job postings for jobs in/around his home town (approx 8 hours west of DC). She knows we don't want to move there -- my family is in New England, so being in an accessible location about the same distance from both sides is ideal, and we both have established jobs here. She claims this is "informational only" so we shouldn't be "offended." She constantly talks about how wonderful life there is for people our age, wants us to go to open houses for properties in their neighborhood when we visit, etc. We're pretty firm with her that its not happening, but still she keeps pushing and it still gets under my skin (this has been going on for about 2 years at this point). Overreacting, or would you be frustrated too? I know I can just keep ignoring it, but that doesn't seem to dissuade her.

[Anonymous]

I'd be annoyed but not so annoyed that I did more than roll my eyes at her and occasionally mention that she's annoying to friends and my own family. So long as you aren't worried she'll wear your husband down, no worries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd be annoyed but not so annoyed that I did more than roll my eyes at her and occasionally mention that she's annoying to friends and my own family. So long as you aren't worried she'll wear your husband down, no worries.

This. My mom (California) and my in-laws (Ohio) both do the same thing. We have made it clear we are not moving. They can send all they want, nothing's going to change.

[Anonymous]

Start sending her ads for nursing homes in DC

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Start sending her ads for nursing homes in DC

LOL!

[Anonymous]

How do you know she is sending them to your husband? I assume it's by email which means you are not getting them. If he tells you about it, then tell him to stop telling you about them. If it bothers him, then he needs to be the one to tell her stop: "Mom, stop sending me these listings. We're not moving and I'm not discussing it further."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Start sending her ads for nursing homes in DC

Haha. I can't think of any better response.

[Anonymous]

Your husband needs to deal with her.

[Anonymous]

Meh, let it go. Moms try to get kids t move closer. It's what they do.

[Anonymous]

You should be grateful she wants you near. Stop being such a hard ass bitch.

[Anonymous]

Envious of your distance, OP! Meanwhile, I'm living a the life of Debra Barone from Everybody Loves Raymond!

Try to ignore as best you can, otherwise, she may channel her energies into going making you go to open houses in DC on her behalf and/or visiting you more often, all under the auspices of relocating closer to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Meh, let it go. Moms try to get kids t move closer. It's what they do.

Agreed. This is such a non-problem.

[Anonymous]

Ask yourself why this is a hill you want to die on, OP. Why are you stirring up conflict over this. It seems like a non issue. So what if she wants you to move closer and she's making that known? That's actually kind of touching when you think about it and it certainly doesn't have any actually effect on your lives. So what, after all, is the problem with what she's doing? Can you define what is annoying you? Is it the really the emails?

[Anonymous]

my mil would do this - only with an added "i'm going to die lonely because of you. in fant, i live lonely. i'm so alone. my friend, Larla, has her kids and grandkids right near by. She is so lucky, I am so lonely and sad. Sometimes i cry. You want me to cry, son? is that what you want? Oh, wait, I know, this is a ploy by your wife - she wants me to cry. She hates me, I know she does. Come home to mommy. i know you want to."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MIL frequently sends my husband job postings for jobs in/around his home town (approx 8 hours west of DC). She knows we don't want to move there -- my family is in New England, so being in an accessible location about the same distance from both sides is ideal, and we both have established jobs here. She claims this is "informational only" so we shouldn't be "offended." She constantly talks about how wonderful life there is for people our age, wants us to go to open houses for properties in their neighborhood when we visit, etc. We're pretty firm with her that its not happening, but still she keeps pushing and it still gets under my skin (this has been going on for about 2 years at this point). Overreacting, or would you be frustrated too? I know I can just keep ignoring it, but that doesn't seem to dissuade her.

You don't like your MIL.