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I'm ready to wean, DS is not... what to do?
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Anonymous
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My DS is 7 months old and I am at the point where I'm ready to start weaning. He loves breastfeeding though and I'm feeling a bit of weaner's guilt (if there's a name for such a thing). If I lay him on the bed he starts vigorously rooting into a pillow and gets really frustrated if I'm not immediately there. If any of my friends hold him, he'll root in their breasts (female or male!) and he roots frequently into the side of his favorite little seat. He definitely has a strong urge to nurse. That being said, I am ready to give up the breast and move him completely onto solids and formula (we started introducing these a couple months ago). He has responded pretty well to solids and takes a bottle half-heartedly. I'm wondering how others have dealt with this decision. I keep going back and forth wondering if I'm being selfish for wanting to quit or if I just need to trudge forward with a bit of tough love?
Another issue is that we're in one bedroom apartment right now and DS will soon be moving into his own room. I don't want to have to keep waking up a couple times a night to nurse him in his own room. In our small quarters, I've been able to pick him up from his crib in our room and quickly nurse him back to sleep. Any insight? |
Anonymous
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when is the "average" time for weaning?
where I'm from they give the breast to the child until they're 24mo. |
Anonymous
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I wouldn't want a bottle either. That formula is disgusting, especially compared to breast milk.
My son weaned himself at 11mos. If he had wanted to stop earlier, then I would have been fine with that, but I would not have forced the formula on him, simply b/c of the fact that the stuff is really gross. |
Anonymous
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OP, I think you have to make the decision that will ultimately be best for your whole family. If you will go insane if you keep nursing, then it is time to make a change.
However, since your boy is such an avid nurser, if there is anyway you can hold out a bit longer, I would go for it. Try to make nursing as convenient for you as possible. Co-sleep if you have to, pump and let your partner do some feedings, stock up on fun magazines, etc. Even if you split it 50/50 with formula, you will still be giving your boy some excellent nutrition, but beyond that, the nursing that he seems to really crave. Only you can decide what's best, but I would try to stick it out as long as you can without being burned out too much or resentful. In the end, happy mommy and baby are what's best. Good luck. |
Anonymous
| One option you have is to sleep-train your DS so that you're not offering him the breast or even the bottle in the night (although I understand this isn't for everyone). You may want to clear this with your pediatrician first to make sure his weighs enough for his age and he doesn't need the additional nutrition but if he's taking enough breastmilk/solids/formula during the day then he's probably ready to go through the night without feeding. With DS1 I did this at 6 months at the pediatrician's recommendation (using Ferber technique) and with DD2 I waited until 8 months (using Weissbluth technique) and it was a huge relief not to have to get up with them in the night. There are other "no cry" sleep-training options as well. It sounds like your little guy has a strong need to suck which makes weaning a bit more difficult. |
Anonymous
I’m glad you’ve done your own taste testing. And thanks for being so supportive of woman who can’t nurse. |
Anonymous
If she COULDN'T nurse I would see your defense. But she CAN and IS. She asked for an opinion on whether or not she is being selfish (her words.) People are giving those opinions. Why attack them for doing what OP asked? You can disagree, surely - but try giving OP YOUR opinion instead of attacking someone for doing what they have been asked. (And yes, I did try both - PP is right.) |
Anonymous
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I normally don't answer if I don't have something supportive to say about nursing mothers, but you did ask. So, yes, basically, I think you are being selfish to wean at this point when the best thing for your child is to nurse until at least one year of age and you give only reasons of convenience for weaning.
That said, you have given your child a gift nursing as long as you have, and it is to no one's benefit if you are feeling resentful when you nurse. I'll also add that it's truly puzzling to me why anyone would be wanting to wean at that stage of the process because, generally speaking, it is one of the most mutually pleasurable ones (db reaches up for your face and gazes into your eyes, etc.), as opposed to those challenging early months. I always consider the 6-9 month nursing period to be the reward for a mother's persistence through the rough parts. But, in the end, nothing I think matters. You need to do what is right for your family. |
Anonymous
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Here is some info to help with your decision.
<http://www.cnn. com/2008/ HEALTH/dailydose /11/19/breast. feeding.benefits /> |
Anonymous
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Trying again - you may have to cut and paste
<http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/dailydose/11/19/breast.feeding.benefits/> |
Anonymous
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I weaned all 3 of my before a year. The reasons are not important (and were different for all 3) but what is important is that I felt my reasons were strong enough that if my sons got upset I knew I could handle it b/c looking at the bigger picture I knew was making the right decision for us. So, looking at the bigger picture for you, is it "worth it" for you to wean if you son gets upset at the process?
As it turns out, all of my sons were fine w/my weaning - I was anticipating drama but there was none. |
Anonymous
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I have a 6.5 month old and some days I feel ready to wean. I am not going to though unless she decides it's time to self-wean. It is a bonding experience that I enjoy, it is convenient, easy and very beneficial to both of our health. I try to think of it as a gift I'm able to give my daughter.
I agree with the pp, formula is absolutely nasty smelling and tasting. If I can avoid giving it to her all the time, then I will. It makes for messier/stinkier diapers and smells horrible on her clothes, bibs etc. |
Anonymous
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Sure nursing is not an AMAZING experience for all of us. However, if the AAP reccomends 1 year and you've already made it 7 months, why is 5 more months such a big deal?
I don't think your choice is selfish, but certainly short sighted. |
Anonymous
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I weaned at 10 months. Child survived.
But she did just get a bunch of Cs on her report card....hmm......maybe that explains it...... 
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Anonymous
By offering HELPFUL advice you don’t use words that are negative. Gross and disgusting are not very encouraging words. You are basically telling foster parents, adoptive parents, and women, who for various reasons, can’t or choose not to nurse, that they are filling their babies’ tummies with gross and disgusting formula. Why attack, you ask . . . By using hurtful words like gross and disgusting you’re on the attack. |