dating, depressing....

[Anonymous]

relationship ended. trying to date again. had two dates this week. on-line matches. both were fine, not really interested in either though. the contrast with former boyfriend was too striking. am i just not ready to date...or do i just need to gear up for rounds of dates with people i don't really click with...

felt depressed after the second one which seemed promising via email.

[Anonymous]

When you end the relationship with last boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

age? what site?

I'm a 35 yr old guy and I hate online dating. It's a lot of work and the dates don't usually work out.

Of course, for women it's not much work, you get 20 messages a day..

[Anonymous]

Why not give the second one a second chance? Maybe some of that promise in the email will come to fruition the better you get to know each other.

[Anonymous]

When I was 24, I was in your same situation. I had broken up with my boyfriend of 5 years about 3 months before I decided to try dating again. Wasn't looking for anything serious, just some companionship. Started on an online dating website and had a couple of so so dates. Went on a date with my now DH and thought it was pretty lukewarm on my part. Actually canceled my second date with him when he set one up at the end of our first date. My roommate convinced me to go on a second date with him and it was great. We have a fantastic relationship/marriage, one that I never thought I deserved/would get.

[Anonymous]

For me, online dating was much more fun when I had no expectations. I have had a similar experience of clicking with someone by email or even by phone, then being very disappointed in person. Once I lost long-term expectations, I enjoyed myself much more, even if the dates didn't turn into anything. I eventually did meet my husband through an online site.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:relationship ended. trying to date again. had two dates this week. on-line matches. both were fine, not really interested in either though. the contrast with former boyfriend was too striking. am i just not ready to date...or do i just need to gear up for rounds of dates with people i don't really click with...

felt depressed after the second one which seemed promising via email.

Don't give up, okay? Seriously, it will probably work out for you in the end. Keep your head up. I can give you a lot of stories from personal experience if need be, but keep an open mind, which is different than having false expectations!

[Anonymous]

Talking on the phone before meeting gives a much better indication of what the person is really like than emailing does. Don't meet before talking on the phone.

[Anonymous]

Go to a few dates before you decide that it's not working for you
.My 1st date was great, 2nd date with him was a disaster-I drove him home with tears falling down my cheeks because I knew I'm about to end the relationship that started so well...
Fast forward, we have been dating 1,5 years, and I'm glad I gave him another chance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go to a few dates before you decide that it's not working for you
.My 1st date was great, 2nd date with him was a disaster-I drove him home with tears falling down my cheeks because I knew I'm about to end the relationship that started so well...
Fast forward, we have been dating 1,5 years, and I'm glad I gave him another chance.

Tears on a 2nd date? Good grief. I'm surprised he gave you another chance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go to a few dates before you decide that it's not working for you
.My 1st date was great, 2nd date with him was a disaster-I drove him home with tears falling down my cheeks because I knew I'm about to end the relationship that started so well...
Fast forward, we have been dating 1,5 years, and I'm glad I gave him another chance.

Tears on a 2nd date? Good grief. I'm surprised he gave you another chance.

That's not nice. She said she was crying on the way home, not at the actual date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go to a few dates before you decide that it's not working for you
.My 1st date was great, 2nd date with him was a disaster-I drove him home with tears falling down my cheeks because I knew I'm about to end the relationship that started so well...
Fast forward, we have been dating 1,5 years, and I'm glad I gave him another chance.

Tears on a 2nd date? Good grief. I'm surprised he gave you another chance.

That's not nice. She said she was crying on the way home, not at the actual date.

A two-date stint is not a "relationship."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:age? what site?

I'm a 35 yr old guy and I hate online dating. It's a lot of work and the dates don't usually work out.

Of course, for women it's not much work, you get 20 messages a day..

True but it's not like they are all quality guys

I just started online dating 3 weeks ago. I went out on 1.5 dates with the same guy. First date he was perfect but the second was awful. I literally walked out.

I agree with the poster who said to talk instead of email. You get a much better feel. I've been talking to a new guy for about a week. Our first conversation was over 5 hours. I've never talked to anyone for 5 hours. We are supposed to meet tonight and I'm thinking about chickening out. Lol. I'm still somewhat traumatized from the last experience. And, I'll be so bummed of there isn't a "connection" in person.

OP- I think it's a numbers game and it gets a little easier the more people you talk to. I'm sure there are some good guys out there. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:age? what site?

I'm a 35 yr old guy and I hate online dating. It's a lot of work and the dates don't usually work out.

Of course, for women it's not much work, you get 20 messages a day..

True but it's not like they are all quality guys

I just started online dating 3 weeks ago. I went out on 1.5 dates with the same guy. First date he was perfect but the second was awful. I literally walked out.

I agree with the poster who said to talk instead of email. You get a much better feel. I've been talking to a new guy for about a week. Our first conversation was over 5 hours. I've never talked to anyone for 5 hours. We are supposed to meet tonight and I'm thinking about chickening out. Lol. I'm still somewhat traumatized from the last experience. And, I'll be so bummed of there isn't a "connection" in person.

OP- I think it's a numbers game and it gets a little easier the more people you talk to. I'm sure there are some good guys out there. Good luck.

I had the same experience talking to this one guy for 5 hours. I thought that was amazing...I've never talked that long.

Then our first date was great. Second was fun.

Then, contact has slowly fizzled to texting...

I can see how it's depressing. I think I have given up a smidge and gone back to whatever happens, happens....

[Anonymous]

It will take some time OP, but you need to keep your chin up.

Your soul mate is INDEED out there, it just may take some patience to find him.

Please do not give up so soon.

Trust me, when you and him do cross paths, you will thank your lucky stars you persevered.

Good things come to those who wait.