So much disappointment this week

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP, you're just minimizing and belittling someone else's pain.

Yes, there is war and famine in the world. But if an athlete who trained their whole life to go to the Olympics narrowly misses making the Olympic team, do they not have a right to be severely disappointed? Kids put in a lot and time and effort. Many made very big sacrifices.

Yes, they'll get over it. But right now, it stings.

NP here. I think your analogy doesn’t make a lot of sense for several reasons. An Olympics hopeful who just misses out on the Olympics is still going to be one of the top 10 or 20 people in the country in their sport. Kids who stand out at the equivalent level academically compared to their peers around the country do tend to get into their top choice schools, even in today’s crazy admissions world. And for most people who just miss the Olympics, that is the end of their sports dream. Compare that to the kids with excellent academics we are discussing here. Every single one of the 20 thousand or so similarly situated academic superstars around the country will end up at a college that will give them the opportunity to continue killing it academically. Many will go on to grad school and have the chance to get the prestige degree they weren’t able to for undergrad if they still value that once they see a bit more of the world.

I think everyone on here understands how disappointing it is to be shut out of your top choices, and no one on here is attacking posters who are merely expressing disappointment or frustration with the system. But that type of poster is a very different one from the type of poster who is outraged that their kid might attend the same college as the class clown or who is thanking her savior that her child got into a better school than the party kids. That’s such an incredibly warped perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

I feel like you went into my brain and articulated how I was feeling and our situation. If I hear it will all work out in the one more time I will scream.

Same. Only accepted at the bottom 4 safety options. We are working so hard to get him excited for the opportunities, but other people cannot hide the shock.

Same here. I admit, I cried when my DC was at school.

My wife cried when our kid texted us one of the recent rejections he received while we were driving to pick up dinner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Blair mom poster here. I know that folks assume that Covid instruction wasn't all "that" during the Zoom year. But - at least for mine - she managed to end the year taking a UMD mutivariable calculus exam and score an A on it so that if she were to go to UMD, she would be able to start there at a higher level and not retake the class. So, it's not like the teens sat around doing nothing...

I agree with the other poster that I think the LAC's don't necessarily understand the Blair magnet program or believe that the students there could actually want them as a first choice (which mine did).

And she certainly was on camera communicating during her ASL class !

We don't know what school rejected DD and the disappointment is difficult. But if it was a very competitive lax than there is no shame is a rejection. The huge majority of applicants get that disappointing rejection.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This year has really proven to me how much college apps is just a lottery.

DD - Blair magnet -- wants an open curriculum school.

4.0 UW/4.75W; plenty of AP tests, significant leadership in a focused club, interesting mentoring that she's done. NMF, Presidential scholar nominee. And really, all-around - an empathetic human who really found herself during Covid and explained that emotional journey in one of her essays.

UMD Honors - half-tuition scholarship
Rejected: Yale, Amherst, Williams, Swathmore
Waitlisted: Wesleyan
Accepted at her other safety school with an interesting scholarship offer.
Waiting on two more selectives.

Maybe it's the test-optional/certain type of diversity (DD has a diversity aspect, but not necessarily the specific diversity sector that is currently being sought); maybe it's Covid deferrals. Maybe it's just that the names are thrown in a hat and are picked out...

We had a good conversation about how the 2 minutes that schools take to look at an application does not define four years of self-driven work, accomplishments and self-discovery as a human.

She is happy with the safety school. And she's not expecting much from the other two at this point. And she wasn't sad about rejections - she was angry that her type of diversity and voice were less valued and that the type of school she wants don't have enough openings/availability for the number of students qualified for them.

Also, a Blair mom, and I know your DD is awesome, so this must be very disappointing.

Mine has very similar stats (down to NMF)! Also some great ECs and national, state and regional awards in a variety of areas. We were faring about the same until recently, but she has gotten some good late admissions. I think 2 things really helped her: 1) schools that had a "Why Xxxx" essay. She was able to make those very specific. I have to think that colleges know students are applying to more schools, so they want to choose students who are more likely to choose them back. 2) she won a couple awards in early March and was able to add an update, which added to her app and served as a reason to connect w/ her admissions counselor.

She also got 1/2 tuition at UMD (but later got that more than doubled w/ a Music scholarship from them), and she got some great scholarships from a safety. (Also, UMD should add to scholarship w/ NMF if they are designated first choice). That's all she had for a long time. We talked about all the merits of these two, and that helped.
Got rejected from Yale SCEA, Oxbridge, Mich, Williams and waitlisted at Middlebury (even after the Dept chair told her they gave her supplement highest marks and met w/ her for 40min).
I have 2 theories about the elite LACs -- either they don't interpret the Blair magnet classes as "rigorous" b/c Ostrander makes them designate only as "advanced" or they've been used by Blair magnet kids in the past as a back up and decided they will reject first. I am wondering the latter especially w/ the Middlebury situation. Are they testing to see if she will show how committed she is to them?
We were lucky that she has gotten some other great offers in the meantime (NU, Wes and Vassar). UMD and mid tier LAC are still in the running -- lots to be said for them.
Will be pulling for her w/ the 2 left. I will say, you have a reach heavy list so far. We kind of did too -- a couple safeties, a couple targets and about 8 reaches. She liked the safeties, so that made us feel better about the numbers. Also, a couple reaches came up as "hard targets" due to older data. '21 was insane, and this year is worse w/ more apps and some places dealing w/ over-enrollment from last year.
I think you are right about the lack of value on being an empathetic human. I think mine was lucky enough to get some accolades from her efforts that were deemed of value. Empathetic investments take time and don't yield that flashy credit. That doesn't seem right. Hope one of your two left sees her value. But, if not, UMD is a great option w/ the honors colleges and everything. We were on a tour the other day with an amazing guide who really helped DD see all that UMD has to offer. And the financial savings would be amazing too!

Which one? You can’t apply to both on UCAS. Also, course choice is hugely important. Apply to an undersubscribed course and your chances are much improved. I actually had a friend employ this strategy and he used his time wisely by getting some compelling CS certs in addition to reading a very challenging, writing-heavy joint course. I think it was brilliantly done, and he saved his family quite a bit of money even with the travel back and forth to the UK, because as you are aware, it’s typically three years’ study instead of the American four.

Your child sounds wonderful and I wish her well as she makes her decision.

Thank you! I was being deliberately vague w/ "Oxbridge" because I didn't want to ID which one. I've probably shared too much info about her as is! She chose the course that interested her most. She was more interested in certain areas of study than hedging bets on acceptance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's flat out depressing. I feel like I failed my child and I am not sure what else could have been done but all those years of striving for excellence, working so hard, dong so many ECs, choosing the hardest classes possible to impress colleges - it was all for nothing. With a virtual perfect academic record and a host of passionate ECs, he's rejected/wl everywhere he really wants to go.

He is in a safety schools that literally the class clowns get accepted to. I'm so sick of talking to people about it, everyone in our community assumed he was going to a T5 school - he is practically famous for being so smart - like photographic memory genius smart and they ask me about it constantly. They cant conceal their shock when I tell them the options. I cant deal with the reactions anymore.

I feel like you went into my brain and articulated how I was feeling and our situation. If I hear it will all work out in the one more time I will scream.

Same. Only accepted at the bottom 4 safety options. We are working so hard to get him excited for the opportunities, but other people cannot hide the shock.

I mean...I'm sorry, I do understand. When my very accomplished and wonderful DS decided to attend one of his safeties after he was rejected/waitlisted/or didn't get enough aid at his top choices, I had someone say to me, with great concern, "I feel like you aren't aiming high enough for Larlo." Can you imagine? I was like, WTF.

But here's the thing. DS went to the safety no one was excited about, and he had a good experience there. It really did work out ok.

I know you think you don't want to hear it, but it is the truth. Your smart, talented, hard-working kid will carry that brain and talent and perseverance with him wherever he goes.

Wow that was rude of them! Glad to hear it worked out well for him!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your kid more likely than not will get into an Ivy. A kid like this seems like a good fit for Yale or Princeton. The thinking person’s Ivies.

Hope so!! Will find out tomorrow and let you know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Blair mom poster here. I know that folks assume that Covid instruction wasn't all "that" during the Zoom year. But - at least for mine - she managed to end the year taking a UMD mutivariable calculus exam and score an A on it so that if she were to go to UMD, she would be able to start there at a higher level and not retake the class. So, it's not like the teens sat around doing nothing...

I agree with the other poster that I think the LAC's don't necessarily understand the Blair magnet program or believe that the students there could actually want them as a first choice (which mine did).

And she certainly was on camera communicating during her ASL class !

If it is her first choice, why didn’t she apply ED? Isn’t ED a strong indicator of first choice?

She had two schools tied for first - Amherst and Brown. Didn't want to be forced to choose with no out and also wanted to see what the schools offered. And neither school offers early action. Brown took several Blair students in ED, so she's not too hopeful that she'll get in, but we'll see what happens later today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Blair mom poster here. I know that folks assume that Covid instruction wasn't all "that" during the Zoom year. But - at least for mine - she managed to end the year taking a UMD mutivariable calculus exam and score an A on it so that if she were to go to UMD, she would be able to start there at a higher level and not retake the class. So, it's not like the teens sat around doing nothing...

I agree with the other poster that I think the LAC's don't necessarily understand the Blair magnet program or believe that the students there could actually want them as a first choice (which mine did).

And she certainly was on camera communicating during her ASL class !

If it is her first choice, why didn’t she apply ED? Isn’t ED a strong indicator of first choice?

I agree with this. She should’ve figured out which school was her first choice.

[Anonymous]

Sorry, but parents crying over this?

Really, that cannot be helping their children cope at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the high GPAS from public schools may be questionable to some of the elite schools mentioned by the Blair mom poster. Public school kids in the DMV were not in school for a full year plus. The education was not good and As were handed out easily or it was a “pass” mark/. We all know it. Lots of kids equally worthy of admission to an top 30 were actually in a school building and standards were not dropped. Admissions folks know it. I do believe that is why there are the huge number of odd rejections out there. Covid strikes again (at least if your kid is in the DMV!)

Interesting - that’s a point I really hadn’t thought about. My D goes to a top ranked, challenging VA public school; as far as we know at this point (and, of course this could change!) but as of today, we are seeing a huge drop in acceptances to certain schools that usually accept many kids from our school (we are talking 1/3 admitted compared to normal). Admittedly, as with other DMV schools, our school was virtual most of last year. Are our kids now being held accountable for that? Would be super upsetting if that is the case - it’s not like they had a choice!

The argument that colleges are purposefully rejecting applicants from public schools that were remote for long periods during the pandemic is patent bullsh-t. Probably from someone here with a chip on their shoulder.

First of all, there's no way at a time when concerns about equity run high that public school kids are going to get the shaft as a result of state policies during an unprecedented public health crisis.

Second, there's tons of anecdotal evidence that runs counter. Read the private school boards sometime which were howling with outrage about ED deferrals and rejections a few months ago, read the angst on College Confidential from kids and parents in states that reopened more quickly.

And read the Naviance results from your own kid's school. At my kid's highly sought after MCPS school, there are similar numbers of acceptances at top schools as in past years. The big difference is simply that the total number of applicants is much larger than in past years, so there are more rejections, even for kids with great stats.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, but parents crying over this?

Really, that cannot be helping their children cope at all.

I think the parents posted that they cried away from their children.

I completely get parents crying when their child gets rejected from a first choice school. We all hate to see our beautiful children hurt or disappointed, but in this case, there is zero we can do about it except support our children. But it's painful for the parents too! We love our children and are so proud of how accomplished they are. I'm truly amazed by my child and can't understand why she hasn't received the Nobel by now! Of course we know our kids will be fine at their third or seventh choice college and this momentary pain will be forgotten. But don't think it doesn't hurt.

[Anonymous]

Why are the acceptance rates so low these days? Do you think it’s because students are applying to more schools than they ever did before? And colleges are worried about yield?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the high GPAS from public schools may be questionable to some of the elite schools mentioned by the Blair mom poster. Public school kids in the DMV were not in school for a full year plus. The education was not good and As were handed out easily or it was a “pass” mark/. We all know it. Lots of kids equally worthy of admission to an top 30 were actually in a school building and standards were not dropped. Admissions folks know it. I do believe that is why there are the huge number of odd rejections out there. Covid strikes again (at least if your kid is in the DMV!)

Interesting - that’s a point I really hadn’t thought about. My D goes to a top ranked, challenging VA public school; as far as we know at this point (and, of course this could change!) but as of today, we are seeing a huge drop in acceptances to certain schools that usually accept many kids from our school (we are talking 1/3 admitted compared to normal). Admittedly, as with other DMV schools, our school was virtual most of last year. Are our kids now being held accountable for that? Would be super upsetting if that is the case - it’s not like they had a choice!

The argument that colleges are purposefully rejecting applicants from public schools that were remote for long periods during the pandemic is patent bullsh-t. Probably from someone here with a chip on their shoulder.

First of all, there's no way at a time when concerns about equity run high that public school kids are going to get the shaft as a result of state policies during an unprecedented public health crisis.

Second, there's tons of anecdotal evidence that runs counter. Read the private school boards sometime which were howling with outrage about ED deferrals and rejections a few months ago, read the angst on College Confidential from kids and parents in states that reopened more quickly.

And read the Naviance results from your own kid's school. At my kid's highly sought after MCPS school, there are similar numbers of acceptances at top schools as in past years. The big difference is simply that the total number of applicants is much larger than in past years, so there are more rejections, even for kids with great stats.

DP. I don’t think the schools are purposefully rejecting kids from schools that were remote, but there are factors that can put those kids at a disadvantage. People in the DC area don’t seem to realize that a huge % of the schools in the country were only remote for a couple of months in the spring of 2020. Many (most?) were back in class full time in the fall. Extracurricular activities were normal, grades were normal. It was obviously not every school, but many schools that were remote put a floor on grades that effectively narrowed the variation between students, kids missed ECs, etc. These super competitive schools only take the “shiniest” students and it is not surprising that those kids don’t “shine” as much as kids from areas that had a more normal experience. Add in a desire for more geographic diversity and first gen students, etc, and it’s a bit of a perfect storm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Blair mom poster here. I know that folks assume that Covid instruction wasn't all "that" during the Zoom year. But - at least for mine - she managed to end the year taking a UMD mutivariable calculus exam and score an A on it so that if she were to go to UMD, she would be able to start there at a higher level and not retake the class. So, it's not like the teens sat around doing nothing...

I agree with the other poster that I think the LAC's don't necessarily understand the Blair magnet program or believe that the students there could actually want them as a first choice (which mine did).

And she certainly was on camera communicating during her ASL class !

If it is her first choice, why didn’t she apply ED? Isn’t ED a strong indicator of first choice?

I agree with this. She should’ve figured out which school was her first choice.

I'm the other Blair parent, and we can't afford ED. Even w/ NPC, there were too many variables with home value (Brown dropped this when it was too late for us). Also, we need to compare FA. So, ED was not an option. On the bright side, everything she's gotten so far has been on the lower end of the NPC calculations.

Here's hoping for at least to more to Brown from Blair!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the high GPAS from public schools may be questionable to some of the elite schools mentioned by the Blair mom poster. Public school kids in the DMV were not in school for a full year plus. The education was not good and As were handed out easily or it was a “pass” mark/. We all know it. Lots of kids equally worthy of admission to an top 30 were actually in a school building and standards were not dropped. Admissions folks know it. I do believe that is why there are the huge number of odd rejections out there. Covid strikes again (at least if your kid is in the DMV!)

Interesting - that’s a point I really hadn’t thought about. My D goes to a top ranked, challenging VA public school; as far as we know at this point (and, of course this could change!) but as of today, we are seeing a huge drop in acceptances to certain schools that usually accept many kids from our school (we are talking 1/3 admitted compared to normal). Admittedly, as with other DMV schools, our school was virtual most of last year. Are our kids now being held accountable for that? Would be super upsetting if that is the case - it’s not like they had a choice!

The argument that colleges are purposefully rejecting applicants from public schools that were remote for long periods during the pandemic is patent bullsh-t. Probably from someone here with a chip on their shoulder.

First of all, there's no way at a time when concerns about equity run high that public school kids are going to get the shaft as a result of state policies during an unprecedented public health crisis.

Second, there's tons of anecdotal evidence that runs counter. Read the private school boards sometime which were howling with outrage about ED deferrals and rejections a few months ago, read the angst on College Confidential from kids and parents in states that reopened more quickly.

And read the Naviance results from your own kid's school. At my kid's highly sought after MCPS school, there are similar numbers of acceptances at top schools as in past years. The big difference is simply that the total number of applicants is much larger than in past years, so there are more rejections, even for kids with great stats.

DP. I don’t think the schools are purposefully rejecting kids from schools that were remote, but there are factors that can put those kids at a disadvantage. People in the DC area don’t seem to realize that a huge % of the schools in the country were only remote for a couple of months in the spring of 2020. Many (most?) were back in class full time in the fall. Extracurricular activities were normal, grades were normal. It was obviously not every school, but many schools that were remote put a floor on grades that effectively narrowed the variation between students, kids missed ECs, etc. These super competitive schools only take the “shiniest” students and it is not surprising that those kids don’t “shine” as much as kids from areas that had a more normal experience. Add in a desire for more geographic diversity and first gen students, etc, and it’s a bit of a perfect storm.

Yes, agree, if twenty five percent of a class has an uw 4.0 than a 4.0 doesn’t mean as much. Schools no longer provide rank but they do provide colleges with median, top and bottom gpas. Colleges can do the math themselves.