Jen Hatmaker
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Anonymous
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So, Caleb has been a brat his whole life, and mom and dad think it is cute.
Not cute as a little kid, not cute as a graduating senior, not cute as a young man trying to enter the service. Snap out of it Jen. The world doesn't think Caleb's antics are as cute as you do. |
Anonymous
Not trying to bash on Caleb… I knew him at ANC. Kind of an Eddie Haskell type of kid. (Probably dating my age, since I doubt anyone not born in the 70’s or earlier know who Eddie Haskell is.) He is humorous and I think he’s intelligent and likely makes friends pretty easily. But, he came across as someone who likes to take shortcuts, not an especially hard worker, a bit entitled, and frankly unmotivated. I could be totally wrong on the read here, but that’s my perception. I never got that vibe from Gavin or Sydney. It’s completely like him to skip out on the graduation ceremony. I don’t blame him so much. But it’s gross that Brandi and Jen Jen were a party to it and went along. Those are things my friends would do, but all of our parents would have not tolerated us doing that. It’s a bit over the line for a parent to do that. If it’s that bad, then decide to it not go in the first place. Make up a story that you’re sick. You’d still get your diploma. |
Anonymous
Oh my God WHY does she keep bringing this up? She just got done on that glennon podcast about how she woke up supposedly to enabling her kids and controlling their consequences and then brings this prime example up yet again?!?!?! What context was it brought up in this time? FFS |
Anonymous
ONE HUNDRED PERCENT |
Anonymous
| I don’t have time to go back on the 100s pages - but have folks heard Jen’s podcast from Monday on Glennon’s podcast? Sorry if I’m late to the party - but no time to back out on this thread. Interesting listen. |
Anonymous
It’s always interesting to me when someone states they don’t have time, but the mere fact we all found this forum kind of indicates we have at least some time. If we’re being honest, we do have time. All this forum is is a big time suck, isn’t it? I know I burn time on here when I could be doing something productive. I think it’s fair to say we all have time to kill as we snark on Jen. |
Anonymous
| JH selling things in Donald Trump’s voice is so hilarious. But it’s sadly so accurate. The difference is that DT has a keen sense for what will sell. I think JH is oblivious. In the last several months I’ve had sponsored Facebook ads from her for Better Help (online counseling) and Me Camp. Let’s just say the comments are not positive. She needs to fire her business manager because I think like DT, she can be a great salesman, and at one time she was. When she sold family she was on fire. What she’s trying to sell now (who knows) is falling waaaayyy flat. |
Anonymous
I think you’re on to something for sure. One thing I believe to be true, is that they’re both Con artists, snake oil salespeople, shysters. In the case of Jen Jen, at least she isn’t criminal and I do believe she has a bit of a moral compass. So there’s that… |
Anonymous
| I think it's appalling to celebrate your kid's surly and entitled behavior. There seems to be a belief that raising a creative and non conformist kid is akin to raising a monster. These mothers are projecting some kind of vicarious selfishness onto their kids. They are in comment competition to see who has the most obnoxious offspring. Jen and her tribe claim to be all about justice and compassion. A child who goes through life disrespecting everyone around them will not magically start valuing other people when they become adults. The foundation of Jen's world is made out of entitlement, nastiness and selfishness. Me everything! |
Anonymous
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I read Jen’s post about Caleb yesterday. In it she tries to give parenting advice to those who have kids like Caleb. The thing that keeps going through my mind is how she’s not an expert with any qualifications to warrant her superior tone. She’s often lecturing us on the ways to do all the things but her own story is mostly illusion. The facts are brutal yet she casually glosses over them and continues with her diatribe as a self made lifestyle guru, life coach.
Nothing against kids being kids and making mistakes but my entire issue is with the way Jen reframes dysfunction as charming and even healthy. The fruit of her parenting is still sketch at best. To the mom who said she wouldn’t have grabbed the camera and laughed if her kids threw their gift lollipop on the floor was on to something. In those early years we do set boundaries of what is and isn’t acceptable and having a defiant personality isn’t celebrated, it’s educated. He needed to know gifts are honored regardless of if they are his taste. I’m wondering if this is now a pattern in his life, he drops things as soon as they aren’t what he wants anymore. In the old days that was seen as a character flaw. |
Anonymous
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I wonder if Caleb wouldn’t get out of bed for school, she’d gush about how individual and walks to the beat of his own drum and just how adorable she finds it.
Or would she go with the I’m just done, I’m not responsible for you and what you won’t do anymore (Remy). |
Anonymous
| Big Sis projects herself as a wise sage and expert on all the things. She'll be the first to tell you. But the women I am mentored by and who I learn from are the quiet, deep, calm, gracious, truly wise women who do not feel the need to loudly proclaim their virtue and goodness and expertise and who do not have an insatiable thirst for the approval of others. They have quietly built largely successful lives and careers and marriages and who've raised largely successful and happy children to adulthood. Not perfect, of course, but who've done well through a beautiful and rich life of purpose and dedication and care. These sorts of women don't have MeCourses or write dumb 'manifestos' about how they have all the answers right before their own world's collapse. |
Anonymous
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She’s simultaneously telling us that 1) her kid is a jerk, has always been a jerk, and not only does she find it hilarious, but has encouraged it his entire life; and 2) we should PAY HER to tell us how to parent our children?
That’s a bold strategy….. |
Anonymous
Ok, I’m gonna say it and it’s snarky and tacky, but I think the whole adoption thing was done somewhat hastily and I’m not 100% sure she doesn’t regret it on some level. I know they love both of them and the bio kids do too… it just always seemed too much of a photo opportunity to me. And she gushes over Ben, because he was easy. Remy struggled more and was younger. I think Sister Jen forgot all the hard things that go into parenting a young child, not to mention the trauma that child went through. It couldn’t have been easy for Remy. Frankly, Jen seemed put off by her. I actually saw such an episode at one of the ANC downtown cookouts once. I was stunned at the way Jen spoke to Remy. She essentially told her to suck it up, butter cup, but not in a loving way, when young Remy was crying and a little whiny about something. I get sometimes we are at the end of our rope with our kiddos, (and I’ve said things angrily that I shouldn’t have.) but Jen was absolutely cold and harsh—- I was quite shocked. But also - I know that there was a perception that Jen used other ANC moms (and perhaps others) as a baby sitter for Remy. Weekend sleep overs were the norm for a while. But strangely, for the most part, those sleepovers weren’t at Jen Jen’s house. It was a one sided deal. Jen had too much adult partying to do. Trips to see the Paisleys, concerts at COTA ; you know, all the stuff parents like to do once their kids are a little older. But I know many folks felt used by her to take Remy off her hands for pretty long periods of time. I mean Jen needs her “me time” for goodness sake. Never mind the millions of parents (married and single) who struggle to have date nights or postpone some of their “me time” for the sake of their kids. I mean— I missed a lot of stuff, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I loved, and still love, spending time with my kids. Jen was that mom who drops her kid off at Gatti Town or Chuck E Cheese, but doesn’t have the courtesy to hang around with the other moms while the pizza party is happening. She bolts and comes back in 2 hrs to pick her kid up. Jen. Just. Can’t. It’s too much for her. I suffered through dozens of these parties, and you know what? I’m glad I did. I helped the other moms. I helped make sure everyone got their cake. It’s what parents do for their kids. Not Jen. She’s too good for that. But she wants you to heed her advice “young moms” (god, it’s so F’n condescending when she addresses younger folks that way!) on all the right ways to raise your kids and manage a family. Yet, her family appears to have taken place at Dysfunction Junction. Gimme an f’n break, sister. |
Anonymous
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There's a big difference between recognizing and working with your kid's unique personality and just letting them go all free-for-all 'aww aren't they an adorable hellion' and I don't trust sis to know the difference. My youngest went through a period of straight-up lying that was well beyond the bounds of magical thinking. We wanted to tear our hair out but oh my goodness we worked to curtail that, while still allowing him plenty of outlet for a vivid imagination. And now I have a 17 year old who talks to us and tells us what's what and is as truthful as anyone but also has a marvelous way of telling stories. I think we've done right by him. I feel like Jen is saying to just let it all go, and hope they turn out okay. Nothing about parenting is a guarantee, but accepting every behavior as some immutable personality trait that can't be guided is a recipe for some future hard lessons for that kid.
(Also, I wonder if she expressly got Gavin's permission to post the underwear photo. I would be pretty damn embarrassed as a young adult to have a childhood pic of me in my tighty-whities out on the internet for all to see. I wouldn't even put it on my private page, and she's got it out there where anyone can see it and screen shot it. I appreciate all the influencers/authors/etc who mark things as 'kid approved post' when they post a picture or tell a story about their kids. It lets me know that they see their children as unique individuals and not merely accessories to the parent's story.) |