MIL makes me sick.

[Anonymous]

Why is it, that my MIL thinks her adult children are walk on water? If one of them shit on the floor, I swear, she'd call it beautiful. But if one of her sons or daughter in laws cleaned it up, she'd say it wasn't good enough. Yes, a crazy example, but you get the idea.

My SIL, for the first time in months, did something today to help elderly MIL (weeded the mini-front yard). I cook, clean and help her run errands weekly. MIL looked at me and said,

"Isn't ______ just a sweetie? She's always looking out for her mother."

I almost vomited. I smiled and nodded my head, but it took everything in me not to say, "Really? What else has she done lately?"

My delusional MIL makes my stomach turn.

[Anonymous]

old people are shitty. 90% of them stress me out.

[Anonymous]

I know, I know.
My biggest fear is that I'll turn into my delusional mother.

[Anonymous]

My MIL thinks my DH is a god that walks on water. It makes me so sick. DH is nice to his mother but really does not go out of his way to cater completely to her. Talking to her you would think he lives solely for her wants and needs and would die for her in a heartbeat. I, on the other hand, am a piece of crap (was told by a family member that she talked to about me). While it doesn't bother me that she dislikes me (because I also dislike her), it sickens me to have to deal with her delusional views of my DH. DH tells me that is how it has been for his entire life (so it's not an elderly thing in her case).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know, I know.
My biggest fear is that I'll turn into my delusional mother.

Is she a Boomer? They're something else, aren't they?

[Anonymous]

You sound very, very, angry.

You need to step back before you explode. Take a break. Ask for some help. Explain to DH how you feel.

Your MIL may express gratitude about your help to others. She may withhold praise about her daughter from her daughter and only express it to others.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you stop doing that for her then? No reason to ell help the ungrateful.

[Anonymous]

First, my sympathies - you are very nice to take care of your MIL like you do - also I have a similar dynamic with my MIL so I get it. But listening to someone else vent, I can have some perspective and here it is - put yourself in your MIL's shoes for a minute - she is aging, becoming more dependent after a lifetime of taking care of herself and others, her daughter doesn't sound like she does much to help, which is painful and embarassing, and she needs to rely on the day to day living help of her daughter in law (after she spent years caring for her own children who are not even the ones to primarily help her now when she needs it). When I think aboü my life becoming that some day, I want to cry - especially since I have boys and since they are young enough now that I can't imagine our relationship evolving that way - but your MIL probably thought that way once, too ... PS - I think your bigger issue should be with your husband who seems contentto let you be the one to do everything for his mother - try to shake up that dynamic a bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is it, that my MIL thinks her adult children are walk on water? If one of them shit on the floor, I swear, she'd call it beautiful. But if one of her sons or daughter in laws cleaned it up, she'd say it wasn't good enough. Yes, a crazy example, but you get the idea.

My SIL, for the first time in months, did something today to help elderly MIL (weeded the mini-front yard). I cook, clean and help her run errands weekly. [b] MIL looked at me and said,

"Isn't ______ just a sweetie? She's always looking out for her mother."

I almost vomited. I smiled and nodded my head, but it took everything in me not to say, "Really? What else has she done lately?"

My delusional MIL makes my stomach turn.

Tell your DH that you are stressed out and need a break and that his sister and he needs to step up and do more for THEIR mom. Give them two weeks to figure out and then take a break.

Once they get into the swing of things, you can step back in and take a turn if you feel like it. But you don't have to. It's not your mom. They can figure it out, hire help, or put her in a nursing home.

[Anonymous]

My MIL is the same way and she's not even old! She'd come over and say: DL, why did you buy so much water? It takes up space. Me: DH bought it. MIL: Oh, isn't he so thoughtful! You are really lucky to have a husband who grocery shops.
This happens all the time, so sick of her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know, I know.
My biggest fear is that I'll turn into my delusional mother.

Is she a Boomer? They're something else, aren't they?[/quote]

I wonder that myself. Seems like a lot of boomer parents are turning into absolute monarchs in their golden years.

[Anonymous]

"old people are shitty. 90% of them stress me out."

Boomer old people = BONUS POINTS!

[Anonymous]

Make sil and dh do more work. Stop being a martyr.