Ding dong ditching and cops brought home

[Anonymous]

The other parents should have been called immediately so they can come and collect their children from someone who clearly has terrible judgment and is not supervising the kids.

I’d be furious if I let my kid stay with you and you let them roam around with friends at night waking people up and getting in trouble with the police.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. Seems like a lot of you don’t remember being this age! Most 8th graders are still pretty immature. I’m not saying it was a good plan or idea but they didn’t harm anyone.

So if we remember being this age and remember doing stupid things such as this does that mean it's okay then? Just wondering.

Some people actually have a more mature and intelligent attitude toward stupid pranks once they grow up.

[Anonymous]

How did you not have these children apologize to the neighbors? How did you not pick up the phone and call parents immediately?
You really are not a good parent or neighbor.

[Anonymous]

They should be made to go apologize in person to the people whose doors they knocked on, that sort of personal accountability will make them think twice before messing with other people again. And let's call it what it is -- messing with other people. Messing with their sleep, their peace and quiet, maybe their peace of mind. Some people here clearly think it's okay to do that, that it's not a big deal. I personally think it's sending the wrong message to anyone, and especially boys, that they can do that and it's okay.

This is probably colored by my own experience. We had a night of ding-dong-ditchers of a group of teen boys in my old neighborhood and it escalated to where they were not only pounding violently on people's front doors, they were jumping on cars up and down the street at 2 a.m. My DH and I woke up terrified that someone was trying to break in. He grabbed a ballbat when he went to the door, and multiple neighbors on the street would have answered the door with guns. The boys caused tens of thousands of dollars of damage to vehicles, including to my DH's vehicle.

We found out later that ONE boy of the group, when he saw how things were going sideways, left to go home and not participate. I sometimes think about the amount of guts that took and hope I could raise my kids to be like that boy. The rest of them got picked up by the police and identities confirmed w/ various doorbell cameras. They had to go through the court system and pay at least some restitution to the people.

We had another incident in our old neighborhood where someone's kid was roaming at night, crawled into someone else's house through a dog door and set their place on fire.

You never know what your kid might get up to when they are roaming at night with no adult supervision, but you can bet that, being teenagers, they will egg each other on and dare each other to do things that they know they wouldn't get away with if they were with their parents.

[Anonymous]

Reading the Apple River stabbing thread made me think back to this thread. Hopefully this group of 14 year olds doesn’t turn into that group of 18 year olds in a few years, instigating things with a stranger isn’t always going to go well.

[Anonymous]

Once the cops are involved, I would call every parent immediately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think this is a big deal except that they might have scared people so late at night. It’s just some stupid kids goofing around.

+1. I do think you need to confirm that the parents know. More because the cops brought them to your house than for the behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 8th grader had friends spend the night. They went out to the park down the street (very safe master planned community) around 10 and about 30 minutes later my doorbell rang and it was 2 cops and my kid and his friends. The cops let me know they got a call and found the kids walking. The kids admitted and were honest and kind of in shock. I couldn't believe they would be so stupid but I realize the collective wisdom of 6 8th grade boys is actually dumb and risky. The cops told them they were putting themselves in a lot of danger because people around here wouldn't hesitate to use a gun in a situation like that in this day and age. They were not wrong. The kids definitely learned their lesson.

How would you handle this with the other parents? One kid already told his mom. Others told me they want to be the ones to tell their parents in the morning, which I understand. I should follow up with a text to the parents later in the day to see if they have spoken with their kid, right? I would want to know and I don't want the parents to think I am not taking responsibility.

First, I don't think you are a bad mom for letting 6 thirteen-year-olds walk to a park in your own community. My daughter meets with her friends since last year (she is 14 now) and they walk all around the community, and yes, during the summer it was sometimes at 10-11pm. I would drop her off at a friends house and 8 of them would walk, at night (gasp!) to our neighborhood school and just hang out by the playground, or play on the field. All good kids, honor students. Same when they come to our house, we have a beautiful pond (short walk) in our neighborhood and they like to go there. It is illuminated and has benches. I think that part is fine. You know your kid and his friends. Now the doorbell ringing and running is immature and it can scare some people. Obviously, someone was bothered enough to call the police. That was wrong. It was an immature thing to do. At that point I would have reached out to the parents via text and asked them if they would like to pick up their kids. You have to tell them ASAP, that is not a question you should be asking in a forum, you should know that is the right thing to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is so freaking funny. But the comments are NOT it. They were knocking on doors and running away laughing. Big freaking deal. There are 8th graders having sex, drinking, and smoking weed.

We have had it done to us before and I laugh and think of when we did it as kids. If they were smarter, they would get a Fios or Comcast remote control and start changing people's channels when they are watching tv. Take it to the next level. LOL

I think it is funny too. The parents that called the police on ding dong ditch are the worst. I mean let the kids be kids. Who cares.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They should be made to go apologize in person to the people whose doors they knocked on, that sort of personal accountability will make them think twice before messing with other people again. And let's call it what it is -- messing with other people. Messing with their sleep, their peace and quiet, maybe their peace of mind. Some people here clearly think it's okay to do that, that it's not a big deal. I personally think it's sending the wrong message to anyone, and especially boys, that they can do that and it's okay.

This is probably colored by my own experience. We had a night of ding-dong-ditchers of a group of teen boys in my old neighborhood and it escalated to where they were not only pounding violently on people's front doors, they were jumping on cars up and down the street at 2 a.m. My DH and I woke up terrified that someone was trying to break in. He grabbed a ballbat when he went to the door, and multiple neighbors on the street would have answered the door with guns. The boys caused tens of thousands of dollars of damage to vehicles, including to my DH's vehicle.

We found out later that ONE boy of the group, when he saw how things were going sideways, left to go home and not participate. I sometimes think about the amount of guts that took and hope I could raise my kids to be like that boy. The rest of them got picked up by the police and identities confirmed w/ various doorbell cameras. They had to go through the court system and pay at least some restitution to the people.

We had another incident in our old neighborhood where someone's kid was roaming at night, crawled into someone else's house through a dog door and set their place on fire.

You never know what your kid might get up to when they are roaming at night with no adult supervision, but you can bet that, being teenagers, they will egg each other on and dare each other to do things that they know they wouldn't get away with if they were with their parents.

Please stop Karen

[Anonymous]

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The cops brought home a group of kids who were…..walking around? Does your area have a teen curfew? What law were they breaking?

This.

Is there anything actually illegal happening here?

I'm not going to argue that this was a "nice" or "neighborly" thing to do, but it seems pretty harmless.

They weren’t charged with doing anything illegal.

Emden of its not illegal its stupid. Like the police said people have guns and will use them. Right canderas are everywhere. It's not like the old days where you can set off cherry bombs at the park.

It’s not stupid. It’s nasty. They’re waking up kids, the elderly, people who are trying to get some decent sleep for an early morning at work. Where is the empathy?

Fine. It's nasty (in your mind, but we'll go with that). Still not illegal, and calling the police (or pulling a gun!!) is absurd.

Some teenage boys acting like they’re trying to gain access to my house, or lure me outside, at 10pm if I were home alone? They’re lucky they weren’t shot. Time for them to learn they aren’t kids anymore.

Umm... they are kids. Anyway, this is an overreaction. I'd tell my kid if the potential dangers, but not a big deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP was naïve for thinking six eighth graders would go innocently play at a park at 10pm, the kids were typical dumb teenagers, deciding that annoying neighbors would be fun (who does this in the era of doorbell cameras?), and police resources were used to break up mischief rather than go after actual criminals, but the biggest problem by far is that this is a country where there are enough people who would shoot a gun at someone fleeing their home after ringing the doorbell that the police predict you’ll get shot for doing that. That’s extremely disturbing.

It's also wrong to think that 13 year old kids are always up to no good and can't or shouldn't go out to play.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP was naïve for thinking six eighth graders would go innocently play at a park at 10pm, the kids were typical dumb teenagers, deciding that annoying neighbors would be fun (who does this in the era of doorbell cameras?), and police resources were used to break up mischief rather than go after actual criminals, but the biggest problem by far is that this is a country where there are enough people who would shoot a gun at someone fleeing their home after ringing the doorbell that the police predict you’ll get shot for doing that. That’s extremely disturbing.

It's also wrong to think that 13 year old kids are always up to no good and can't or shouldn't go out to play.

But in this case they WERE up to no good. It’s disrespectful to knock on doors late at night and then run off. It wakes people (like babies!) up, it scares people, it’s just inconsiderate. And if any of those 13 year olds looked adult-like yet, especially if a POC…. let’s be honest, people are going to start getting more than a little scared. I wonder if that’s why the police were called.

Ding dong ditch is a game for 10 year olds during daytime. When it’s basically harmless. Not near- adults at 10-11pm.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:^and I wouldn’t think anything of them going out at 10pm. It wouldn’t occur to me they would ding dong ditch.

The the PP. I would. What would they possibly be up to at 10 pm outside that isn’t trouble? I wouldn’t allow it. If they want to hang out outside at 10pm, they can stay on the patio and around the yard. Not roam around the neighborhood

OP here. I guess in my mind walking to the park (basically a small little pocket park) half a block a way at 10 pm is not roaming. Again, it is on me for thinking they would just do that and I should have kept a closer watch. I will be honest and say that I tend to approach things like this from a POV of letting kids feel some sense of freedom and fun rather than one of constant suspicion. These kids didn't warrant concern in that way. That is on me, yes. Honestly, I was just glad they were not cooped up in his room gaming. Now I know better.

I'm in my 50s and was, as were all my friends, free range kids. My parents had no idea where I was during the day. Yet, the rule for us and all the kids I hung out with were that we had to be home by dark. In the summer time where I grew up, that was about 9PM. Just why do you think that was? Even in the 'good old days', our parents knew nothing good came of young teens being out after dark. I can't believe your naiveté and poor judgment.

80s kid. We always had to be home when the street lights came on.

This has zero to do with free range parenting.

How did you hunt for nightcrawlers before dark? How did you catch lightning bugs before dark?

Lightning bugs are best caught at dusk and worms in the morning after rain.

Not nightcrawlers.

How about flashlight tag?

These kids weren’t playing flashlight tag. And they’re almost in high school. If your teenage son and his friends say they’re heading out to play flashlight tag after the adults go to bed, I have a bridge to sell you.

Why? Some kids actually can and do behave themselves. Some kids actually like to be kids fir longer than is usually allowed. I'd be thrilled of my teens did this

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP was naïve for thinking six eighth graders would go innocently play at a park at 10pm, the kids were typical dumb teenagers, deciding that annoying neighbors would be fun (who does this in the era of doorbell cameras?), and police resources were used to break up mischief rather than go after actual criminals, but the biggest problem by far is that this is a country where there are enough people who would shoot a gun at someone fleeing their home after ringing the doorbell that the police predict you’ll get shot for doing that. That’s extremely disturbing.

It's also wrong to think that 13 year old kids are always up to no good and can't or shouldn't go out to play.

But in this case they WERE up to no good. It’s disrespectful to knock on doors late at night and then run off. It wakes people (like babies!) up, it scares people, it’s just inconsiderate. And if any of those 13 year olds looked adult-like yet, especially if a POC…. let’s be honest, people are going to start getting more than a little scared. I wonder if that’s why the police were called.

Ding dong ditch is a game for 10 year olds during daytime. When it’s basically harmless. Not near- adults at 10-11pm.

Ok, I understand how this isn't the right thing to do, and I'd have a talk with my kid, but really they could be out doing so much worse