Posting on Facebook where kid is going -Yes or No

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really relate to that dad’s pride and excitement, but IMO Facebook isn’t the place to share all of that. My own DC is 7 for 7 with acceptances right now, with merit aid at all but one, and is still waiting on a few more decisions. One of her acceptances is somewhere that every other classmate she’s heard of was deferred. Am I proud and relieved? Absolutely. Have I put this up on FB? Absolutely not. We are sharing admissions updates with the grandparents and my siblings (who don’t have kids) because it feels great to share with someone, and they’re as delighted as we are. But it would come off as obnoxious on FB, especially for friends whose kids have applied to many of the same schools with varying success. In May I’ll share a little update on where she’s headed in the fall. Anyone who wants to know more can ask me face to face.

So, let me get this straight....

...you won't post that stuff on FB, where you are followed by family and friends who want to see it and would likely be happy for you, because you don't want to come off as "obnoxious"...

...but you will post it here, anonymously, among people who have no knowledge of you and can only make snap judgments?

Makes PEFECT sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s weird to list every school. I’ve only seen one post like that. Yeah, one excited post about their final decision is exactly the kind of thing people want to see and share. It becomes obnoxious though when you work it into half your future posts. I know your kid is at Harvard now and I’m happy for him. Squeezing in Cambridge and bringing it up every time you mention him is gross. Deans List letters are gross-let go.

Well, it all depends on your Facebook friends. For me, it’s mainly family. Only one or two school friends. I figured if they were okay about posting their achievements over the years, then I have the green light as well.

Also, some first gen or big family types do this. Not as bragging rights but as a source of pride. For some families, getting a college education is such a big step. Why not be proud.

We will do it our way. It’s not always about the neighbors or carpool/mom friends.

None of these examples are from first gen families. It’s just obnoxious after the initial announcement. You can even share pics of them without mentioning Harvard, Yale, or Cambridge- it’s possible. Larla is enjoying her first snowstorm vs Larla is enjoying her first snowstorm at Yale. Cringe.

I am not on board with people posting multiple acceptances, but get over yourself. If someone wants to post a photo of their kid doing something at their new school and you don't like it, simply unfollow. I post photos of our visits to my kid's top 20 school as well as some fun photos/videos of him singing solo in the choir at his school and always name the school. If you don't like it, scroll along, unfollow or unfriend.

Guessing you’re in a school sweatshirt in those photos too. Yeah, it’s weird. Let go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the bed party trend?

OP? -NP

Those bed parties are bonkers. I think it may be a southern thing. Basically, kid sits on their bed and is surrounded by a pile of school swag, balloons, etc. It's gross.

https://grownandflown.com/bed-party-college-decision/

Surprisingly, it’s not a southern thing. It’s a NJ/NY thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s weird to list every school. I’ve only seen one post like that. Yeah, one excited post about their final decision is exactly the kind of thing people want to see and share. It becomes obnoxious though when you work it into half your future posts. I know your kid is at Harvard now and I’m happy for him. Squeezing in Cambridge and bringing it up every time you mention him is gross. Deans List letters are gross-let go.

Well, it all depends on your Facebook friends. For me, it’s mainly family. Only one or two school friends. I figured if they were okay about posting their achievements over the years, then I have the green light as well.

Also, some first gen or big family types do this. Not as bragging rights but as a source of pride. For some families, getting a college education is such a big step. Why not be proud.

We will do it our way. It’s not always about the neighbors or carpool/mom friends.

None of these examples are from first gen families. It’s just obnoxious after the initial announcement. You can even share pics of them without mentioning Harvard, Yale, or Cambridge- it’s possible. Larla is enjoying her first snowstorm vs Larla is enjoying her first snowstorm at Yale. Cringe.

I am not on board with people posting multiple acceptances, but get over yourself. If someone wants to post a photo of their kid doing something at their new school and you don't like it, simply unfollow. I post photos of our visits to my kid's top 20 school as well as some fun photos/videos of him singing solo in the choir at his school and always name the school. If you don't like it, scroll along, unfollow or unfriend.

Guessing you’re in a school sweatshirt in those photos too. Yeah, it’s weird. Let go.

Yes the school sweatshirt, hat, and even a little face paint perhaps? DS attends a school with a lot of school spirit and great football that attracts very large crowds of alumni and parents. So, yes, it is an event worth sharing on Facebook. Sorry your life is so dull.

[Anonymous]

I love the “DC will be a freshman at X university in September”. I don’t get why anyone would be offended by those updates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love the “DC will be a freshman at X university in September”. I don’t get why anyone would be offended by those updates.

That's because you are not jealous, or bitter, or petulant, or just plain unpleasant. To your credit.

[Anonymous]

All these idiots who obsess over the connections their kids will make at a T20 school. But make sure you keep it a secret from the people you already know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love the “DC will be a freshman at X university in September”. I don’t get why anyone would be offended by those updates.

I think that’s about as far as everyone agrees is ok. That’s news.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s weird to list every school. I’ve only seen one post like that. Yeah, one excited post about their final decision is exactly the kind of thing people want to see and share. It becomes obnoxious though when you work it into half your future posts. I know your kid is at Harvard now and I’m happy for him. Squeezing in Cambridge and bringing it up every time you mention him is gross. Deans List letters are gross-let go.

Well, it all depends on your Facebook friends. For me, it’s mainly family. Only one or two school friends. I figured if they were okay about posting their achievements over the years, then I have the green light as well.

Also, some first gen or big family types do this. Not as bragging rights but as a source of pride. For some families, getting a college education is such a big step. Why not be proud.

We will do it our way. It’s not always about the neighbors or carpool/mom friends.

None of these examples are from first gen families. It’s just obnoxious after the initial announcement. You can even share pics of them without mentioning Harvard, Yale, or Cambridge- it’s possible. Larla is enjoying her first snowstorm vs Larla is enjoying her first snowstorm at Yale. Cringe.

I am not on board with people posting multiple acceptances, but get over yourself. If someone wants to post a photo of their kid doing something at their new school and you don't like it, simply unfollow. I post photos of our visits to my kid's top 20 school as well as some fun photos/videos of him singing solo in the choir at his school and always name the school. If you don't like it, scroll along, unfollow or unfriend.

Guessing you’re in a school sweatshirt in those photos too. Yeah, it’s weird. Let go.

Yes the school sweatshirt, hat, and even a little face paint perhaps? DS attends a school with a lot of school spirit and great football that attracts very large crowds of alumni and parents. So, yes, it is an event worth sharing on Facebook. Sorry your life is so dull.

Students and alum makes sense. Parents? Weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s weird to list every school. I’ve only seen one post like that. Yeah, one excited post about their final decision is exactly the kind of thing people want to see and share. It becomes obnoxious though when you work it into half your future posts. I know your kid is at Harvard now and I’m happy for him. Squeezing in Cambridge and bringing it up every time you mention him is gross. Deans List letters are gross-let go.

Well, it all depends on your Facebook friends. For me, it’s mainly family. Only one or two school friends. I figured if they were okay about posting their achievements over the years, then I have the green light as well.

Also, some first gen or big family types do this. Not as bragging rights but as a source of pride. For some families, getting a college education is such a big step. Why not be proud.

We will do it our way. It’s not always about the neighbors or carpool/mom friends.

None of these examples are from first gen families. It’s just obnoxious after the initial announcement. You can even share pics of them without mentioning Harvard, Yale, or Cambridge- it’s possible. Larla is enjoying her first snowstorm vs Larla is enjoying her first snowstorm at Yale. Cringe.

I am not on board with people posting multiple acceptances, but get over yourself. If someone wants to post a photo of their kid doing something at their new school and you don't like it, simply unfollow. I post photos of our visits to my kid's top 20 school as well as some fun photos/videos of him singing solo in the choir at his school and always name the school. If you don't like it, scroll along, unfollow or unfriend.

Guessing you’re in a school sweatshirt in those photos too. Yeah, it’s weird. Let go.

Yes the school sweatshirt, hat, and even a little face paint perhaps? DS attends a school with a lot of school spirit and great football that attracts very large crowds of alumni and parents. So, yes, it is an event worth sharing on Facebook. Sorry your life is so dull.

Students and alum makes sense. Parents? Weird.

Like I said, sorry your life is so dull. We are not alums, but go to as many games as we can so we can see our son. He loves when we come and we hang out with parents of his friends at tailgates. It's a blast. Sorry your kid's school is so boring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just post where your kid is going. It’s obnoxious to post all the schools he or she got accepted to. It’s equivalent to people posting their Christmas tree and showing off all their presents. Just don’t.

Who are you to tell us what we should and should not share with others online? Why does it matter so much to you?

If we want to do it, so be it. Up to you to enjoy our post or to walk away saying "tsk, tsk, tsk tacky".
I agree with the former poster. Get over yourself. If you don't want to see it, unfriend the friend.

But you DO NOT CONTROL other people's free speech.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just post where your kid is going. It’s obnoxious to post all the schools he or she got accepted to. It’s equivalent to people posting their Christmas tree and showing off all their presents. Just don’t.

Who are you to tell us what we should and should not share with others online? Why does it matter so much to you?

If we want to do it, so be it. Up to you to enjoy our post or to walk away saying "tsk, tsk, tsk tacky".
I agree with the former poster. Get over yourself. If you don't want to see it, unfriend the friend.

But you DO NOT CONTROL other people's free speech.

“Free speech”? That’s between you and the government and has nothing to do with this disagreement. Why do so many Americans not understand this?

[Anonymous]

The question of whether you’re offended is different from the question of whether it’s polite. You could be very happy for others who post and at the same time decide not to post because you think it might be impolite for your own friends and situation.

Just because one person is not offended does not mean these posts are always inoffensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The question of whether you’re offended is different from the question of whether it’s polite. You could be very happy for others who post and at the same time decide not to post because you think it might be impolite for your own friends and situation.

Just because one person is not offended does not mean these posts are always inoffensive.

That's fair. For me, posting stuff has worked to DCs advantage. Some of my facebook friends have reached out with invitations to share more about their former schools (which DC got in to) and/or contacts at the school or inside resources for internships. It would not have happened had I not shared part of the journey.
Not for everyone, but it worked out for my DC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just curious on thoughts. Do you think it's OK to post on FB where your kid is off to? And if so, is it completely tacky to mention merit? Like can I mention kid is a "Provost Scholar" (or whatever) - and yes, it makes them sound way smarter than they actually are. I think a simple "my kid is going here," with pic of kid in college sweatshirt, is sufficient.
Don't get me started on the bed party trend...

Once decision is made to attend? Yes. Schools your kid got accepted? No.