Where are you sending your high IQ child

[Anonymous]

OK, I totally hate labels, and I find it uncomfortable to talk about IQ. But on a forum like this, I figure I can do it. My DC is on the relative high IQ level (138). Not a genius, but bright. While a pretty normal kid in a lot of ways, he is quirky sometimes too and is VERY sensitive emotionally. My child is also exhibiting behavioral issues that I believe, in part, are due to his school and lack of challenge. His teachers dismiss that he may need more challenging work and he complains that the work is "stupid"l and is for little kids (he is 5). I am honestly concerned that I need to switch schools but I don't know where best to look. I welcome input from parents who have gone through similar experiences. We live in Bethesda. I am open to input on public, private, nysmith, etc. Thanks for your feedback and ideas. Also-- does anyone know of a doctor/educator or some kind of specialist that might be able to help us connect the dots on behavior, IQ, school environment, etc.? Again appreciate all input. Thanks for taking the time.

[Anonymous]

I would caution you about putting his issues all on his IQ. Most kids with his IQ don't have behavioral problems in a typical classroom. I have seen so many children who exhibit problems who either blame it on boredom, or more likely, their parents blame it on boredom, when it is actually a learning or developmental issue. Before you latch onto IQ, try to get some sort of further evaluation. A developmental pediatrician would be a great start. I have a son with an extremely high IQ who also has some serious developmental challenges and I have learned that a major mistake is for parents to be blinded by the IQ and miss the real problem as a result.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would caution you about putting his issues all on his IQ. Most kids with his IQ don't have behavioral problems in a typical classroom. I have seen so many children who exhibit problems who either blame it on boredom, or more likely, their parents blame it on boredom, when it is actually a learning or developmental issue. Before you latch onto IQ, try to get some sort of further evaluation. A developmental pediatrician would be a great start. I have a son with an extremely high IQ who also has some serious developmental challenges and I have learned that a major mistake is for parents to be blinded by the IQ and miss the real problem as a result.

Very well said.

[Anonymous]

Our well-known psychologist said(child's IQ in high 150's)-

"If your child is so bright, he will always be bright. If he is having trouble behaviorally, deal with it NOW, not later." We took that to heart, got an eval and some serious social skills help and the doctors were right on target, it turns out. Hard to hear but true. We were told that rarely is the child so bored that they act out in school solely because they are not challenged. If you see some symptoms at home or with friends out of school, that will be a clue that something else is probably going on besides boredom with the curriculum. Another point is that your child will find himself in boring situations all of his life, and he won't be able to just leave the boring place when he feels like it. You could discuss with him what are good ways to deal with boredom(get a book out, ask for enriching activities etc.). By the way, my child is in public, MOCO. Good luck. It's always difficult to see your child struggle.

[Anonymous]

OP Here. Excellent advice. I have made an appointment with a developmental ped.

[Anonymous]

Perhaps this is a dumb question, but how is it that you have an IQ score for a five-year-old child? Did you have him tested? Do they test for IQ at Kindergarten??

[Anonymous]

Get him tested to see if there are other underlying issues to the behavioral problems; ADHD, SPD, etc... my daughter is bright but will not try anything new (says its boring or creates excuses), and we found out she has sensory issues and has a hard time with handwriting (due to fine motor skills and bilateral coordination) after 6 months of OT she is doing fine in the 3 grade

[Anonymous]

Yes, the private school admissions tests are IQ tests. They are considered highly valid from ages 5-8.

[Anonymous]

Note the tests are administered by an expert, usually outside of the school. For example, Assessment Associated in Chevy CHase. Typically PhD Psychologists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our well-known psychologist said(child's IQ in high 150's)-

"If your child is so bright, he will always be bright. If he is having trouble behaviorally, deal with it NOW, not later." We took that to heart, got an eval and some serious social skills help and the doctors were right on target, it turns out. Hard to hear but true. We were told that rarely is the child so bored that they act out in school solely because they are not challenged. If you see some symptoms at home or with friends out of school, that will be a clue that something else is probably going on besides boredom with the curriculum. Another point is that your child will find himself in boring situations all of his life, and he won't be able to just leave the boring place when he feels like it. You could discuss with him what are good ways to deal with boredom(get a book out, ask for enriching activities etc.). By the way, my child is in public, MOCO. Good luck. It's always difficult to see your child struggle.

Where did you turn for social skills help?

[Anonymous]

Dr. Judith Glasser is phenomenal. She worked with our extremely high IQ child to help tease out issues of asynchronous development that often occur with gifted children. She also helped steer us in the right direction in terms of schools. She can do IQ testing as well as achievement and cognitive testing (to tease out learning issues). Here is a link to her website:

http://www.judithglasser.com/contact.html

Also, I highly recommend this book, it really helped me and my DH understand our child better:

Raising Gifted Kids by Barbara Klein.

Last thing: there are institutions that will help you tease out your child's strengths and weaknesses as well as offer additional support, educational travel, summer classes, etc. In our area, there is the Johns Hopkins Center for Talented Youth (the child psychologists will actually speak to you at great length over the phone if you put in a call to their admin asst.) and nationally there is the Davidson Institute (you can google these).

Best Wishes

[Anonymous]

OP, my child is also 5 years old and her IQ is also in the high 130s. She doesn't have behavioral issues, though, so I doubt your child's problems are directly related to IQ. She does attend a challenging school in Bethesda (WES) and seems to have found the right balance of play and learning there.

[Anonymous]

Many speech therapists in the area also have social skills groups. My son attends one run by Laura Rubinoff in bethesda and it is fantastic. But there are others. I would ask around about speech therapists and start there.

I would hold off on CTY and giftedness programs. The problem here isn't giftedness, its behavior, and thats what you need to pursue.

[Anonymous]

12:08 here. I suggested CTY because they do have child psychologists on staff who can do testing and educational planning, not just for the socially well-adjusted highly gifted child, but also for those who need support. They are a great resource if ou need to know where to turn to next.

[Anonymous]

I certainly wouldn't discount behavioral issues, but it sounds like the teachers at the school aren't helping things, either. At our Montgomery County public school we were able to request an extra round of testing for our child in one subject. It gave the teachers a great deal of additional info because it showed how far ahead our child was in that area. They are now serving as advocates for our child, and we couldn't be more pleased.

Have you asked them to do more testing? If they won't, some private testing (possibly achievement tests?) might give you more ammunition for conversations with the school.

Unfortunately, I think the responses will vary from school to school, with some schools being more helpful than others.