What is the deal with grandparents being called names other than grandma and grandpa?

[Anonymous]

My grandmothers were always Nana [First Name] growing up. It seemed perfectly normal to me.

One set of our parents asked to be called Grandma and Grandpa (G'ma and G'pa) and the other requested Nana and Pop Pop. Works for us!

[Anonymous]

OP, seriously, of all things to get annoyed about, is this one really worth so much thought? There are so many other things to worry about then what other people call their grandparents. Double sheesh.

[Anonymous]

zumbamama wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

zumbamama wrote:My mom didn't want to be called Grandma because she thinks it sounds too old. She came up with her own name, but I don't see anything wrong with it. MIL and S-MIL also chose their own names. I think it's easier to refer to them by their chosen names instead of Grandma 1, Grandma 2 and Grandma 3.

When I'm a grandmother I want to be called Lola, which is what I call mine.

I like Lolo and Lola and think it's too bad I am not Filipino.

maybe your DCs will marry a Filipino(a) then they can call you Lola!

Very true. DD (6) already has plans on marrying a Filipino boy (10) even though he keeps telling her no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are your parents baby boomers? Mine are and I think it's a baby boomer mentality thing. They like to think that they aren't like their parents, all old and retired and grandma-ish. I think the boomers are a much more vibrant generation and have a tough time relating to what they picture "grandma" and "grandma" to be. The different titles are a form of denial, in my opinion.

bingo. Mil and sil do this. It might be a southern thing too.

[Anonymous]

Papi et Mamie - French grandparents
Ong and Ba - Vietnamese grandparents
Obasan - Japanese great-grandmother.

So nice to have several languages to fall back upon, otherwise we would not know what to do

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, seriously, of all things to get annoyed about, is this one really worth so much thought? There are so many other things to worry about then what other people call their grandparents. Double sheesh.

triple sheesh for posting this... Yes, there is cancer and hunger in the world we could be posting about. It's still annoying that your in laws want to be called, "mee mee" and "tigger."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

zumbamama wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

zumbamama wrote:My mom didn't want to be called Grandma because she thinks it sounds too old. She came up with her own name, but I don't see anything wrong with it. MIL and S-MIL also chose their own names. I think it's easier to refer to them by their chosen names instead of Grandma 1, Grandma 2 and Grandma 3.

When I'm a grandmother I want to be called Lola, which is what I call mine.

I like Lolo and Lola and think it's too bad I am not Filipino.

maybe your DCs will marry a Filipino(a) then they can call you Lola!

Very true. DD (6) already has plans on marrying a Filipino boy (10) even though he keeps telling her no.

I'm Filipino and we use Lolo and Lola for my parents.
For my mother in law we use Namma because by nieces couldn't pronouce grandma when they were young and the name stuck.

[Anonymous]

One side of my family has been using different names of grandparents for generations - had nothing to do with the baby boomers. I think it is nice and less confusing for kids to have their different sets of grandparents to have different names.

[Anonymous]

this has probably already been said, but sometimes kids have their own names regardless of you wanting to call them grandma & grandpa. a good family friend was dubbed "gree" by her first granddaughter and it has stuck despite her wanting to be "grandma." so she is gree now. my SIL's parents also wanted to be grandma & grandpa and they ended up being called gigy and e-paw.

[Anonymous]

OP: Did you ever think your parents may not like the names you choose for your child? You are probably not aware because they realize it is not their place to say anything. Get it?

[Anonymous]

Actually I agree with earlier PP that OP should let it go..... the grandparents get to decide so little and have to accept all the choices that we make as parents (I'm not saying that they shouldn't, they had their turn, but realize that it is hard), why not let them pick the name that they want to be called and help the kid learn it.
A good relationship with the grand parents is worth so much and this is such an easy bone to throw.

[Anonymous]

I think the term Pop Pop is bizarre.

I love Pop-Pop! Maybe because I had an amazing one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP: Did you ever think your parents may not like the names you choose for your child? You are probably not aware because they realize it is not their place to say anything. Get it?

Anonymous wrote:Actually I agree with earlier PP that OP should let it go..... the grandparents get to decide so little and have to accept all the choices that we make as parents (I'm not saying that they shouldn't, they had their turn, but realize that it is hard), why not let them pick the name that they want to be called and help the kid learn it.
A good relationship with the grand parents is worth so much and this is such an easy bone to throw.

Okay, so what do you two think about my in-laws, who don't have a name after eight months? What should we refer to them as when we're asked not to refer to them as grandma and grandpa? Or do you think we should have allowed "daddymama?"

BTW, I have a pretty good relationship with my in-laws, but this one irks me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP: Did you ever think your parents may not like the names you choose for your child? You are probably not aware because they realize it is not their place to say anything. Get it?

Anonymous wrote:Actually I agree with earlier PP that OP should let it go..... the grandparents get to decide so little and have to accept all the choices that we make as parents (I'm not saying that they shouldn't, they had their turn, but realize that it is hard), why not let them pick the name that they want to be called and help the kid learn it.
A good relationship with the grand parents is worth so much and this is such an easy bone to throw.

Okay, so what do you two think about my in-laws, who don't have a name after eight months? What should we refer to them as when we're asked not to refer to them as grandma and grandpa? Or do you think we should have allowed "daddymama?"

BTW, I have a pretty good relationship with my in-laws, but this one irks me.

PP: I think your in-laws have told you what they want.....not to be called grandma and grandpa. The ball is in your court....what do you want to call them? It seems to me like the grandparents don't want to step on any toes by telling you what to call them. I don't understand your comment..."do you think we should have allowed "daddymama"", is that a joke or is that what the grandparents asked to be called? I think these gracious grandparents are not putting you in a position to "allow" anything. Why don't you make a suggestion to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: PP: I think your in-laws have told you what they want.....not to be called grandma and grandpa. The ball is in your court....what do you want to call them? It seems to me like the grandparents don't want to step on any toes by telling you what to call them. I don't understand your comment..."do you think we should have allowed "daddymama"", is that a joke or is that what the grandparents asked to be called? I think these gracious grandparents are not putting you in a position to "allow" anything. Why don't you make a suggestion to them.

You are incorrect on all counts.

I've posted the backstory to daddymama previously. But here it is again. IL's told us while I was still pregnant that they wanted to come up with special grandparent names for themselves and did not want to be called Grandma or Grandpa. They also excluded all grandma and grandpa type names (nana, papa, Grammy, Pap-Pap, etc). They asked for suggestions, and although we didn't really have any ideas we tried to be good sports and came up with a few that they didn't like. Fast forward -- DC is now 8 months old and the ONLY name they came up with is daddymama (for the grandma). FIL actually came up with something but MIL said he couldn't be called a grandparent name until she had selected hers, and they have to match. Tell me where, from my post, you drew the assumption that the grandparents are being gracious, putting the ball in our court, or trying to avoid stepping on our toes?

DC is now old enough to start to understand words (he will look at our pets when we call their names, says mama and dada to the right person, etc). So we would actually like to foster a close relationship with these grandparents, but it's more than a little bit awkward that we do not have names for them yet. When they visit, we made the mistake of saying "Grandma is going to hold you now" and MIL said "I'm not grandma." Sorry, I guess to me that's not terribly gracious!