Donor Cycle Failure - doctor recommends moving on to surrogate but that seems premature?

[Anonymous]

OP I’m sorry you are going through this. You can get a second opinion but you have been through a lot of tries already. I wish we had gone to surrogacy sooner myself. So many miscarriages. So many tries. So many doctors. And the money. We have two children through surrogacy. But it was expensive. Other than that not a problem.

[Anonymous]

8:01 PP again-- SGF also tried to push both surrogacy and donor eggs on me before I even started IVF. They actually refused to do IVF on me until I had a signed contract with a surrogate (which costs tens of thousands of dollars to even get to that point, without even knowing if you'll have any viable embryos to transfer). It was basically their way of pushing me out to another clinic because they didn't want my crappy eggs ruining their success rates.

Agree with PP who suggested karyotyping. SGF didn't even order that test (MFM doctor ordered it). Turns out I have a balanced translocation. I left SGF for CFA, because Dr. Abbasi was willing to do IVF first (I wasn't getting any younger), and then sort out who would carry the pregnancy IF I had any viable embryos. I did ONE cycle of IVF and ended up with twins. Run far, far from SGF.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

Why would it be?

Many countries have laws prohibiting going abroad for surrogacy, and they can and do prohibit the adoptive parents from taking the child back to their country. There are anti-surrogacy and anti-trafficking laws. You'd have to get legal counsel regarding how this might affect a visa or foreign citizenship.

You might want to educate yourself. The term is “intended parents” not adoptive parents. We had a baby via surrogacy and both our names were directly on the birth certificate. Surrogacy is not adoption.

[Anonymous]

From my understanding, surrogacy and embryo adoption are illegal in Austria, but egg donation is legal. So if you might be interested in trying another cycle with donor eggs, you should be able to do so with a local clinic once you arrive in Austria. Your child would be a US citizen only; they would not receive Austrian citizenship, and you would apply for a US consular certificate of birth abroad, together with a local Austrian certificate of birth. Then you can apply for the US passport, SSN etc. (I am an earlier poster who gave birth in Germany so I know this process).

You are correct also that many Europeans and American citizens living in Europe travel to the Czech Republic for IVF and surrogacy. IVF is about $5,000 and surrogacy is about $50,000 USD so prices are much lower in the Czech Republic than other parts of Europe and of course the United States.

Your other option is to hire a surrogate in the United States. You could travel back stateside for any milestone appointments and then of course for the birth and several weeks/months after when you will need to obtain the official documents necessary to bring your child back to Austria (passport, visa, SSN, adding child to employee’s insurance and orders/contract etc.). It does not matter if you are bringing a child to Austria from the United States as long as you have the proper documentation; there is no difference between whether you gave birth to the child, a surrogate did, or you adopted.

Where you may need to do a bit more research and potentially consult with a legal specialist is if you do hire a surrogate that is not located in your country of citizenship nor in your country of residence, and understanding how that process works to legally bring a child from the Czech Republic into Austria. I do know women who have been in a tiny bit of a similar situation; US citizens who were stationed with their husbands at a small military installation in Poland or Spain and were provided the option to come to the large american military hospital in Germany to deliver their babies as there was not care up to American standard at their locations. So people who did have a child in a different country from their citizenship and residence (though it was for biological birth and coordinated through the military). Your particulars (surrogate and not having affiliation with the US government) I think would require some further legal guidance. A good place to start would your / your spouse’s employer’s legal department and also the US Embassy in Austria.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

Why would it be?

Many countries have laws prohibiting going abroad for surrogacy, and they can and do prohibit the adoptive parents from taking the child back to their country. There are anti-surrogacy and anti-trafficking laws. You'd have to get legal counsel regarding how this might affect a visa or foreign citizenship.

You might want to educate yourself. The term is “intended parents” not adoptive parents. We had a baby via surrogacy and both our names were directly on the birth certificate. Surrogacy is not adoption.

You might want to educate yourself. In some places adoption is legally required for surrogacy because the birth mother's name must go on the birth certificate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

Why would it be?

Many countries have laws prohibiting going abroad for surrogacy, and they can and do prohibit the adoptive parents from taking the child back to their country. There are anti-surrogacy and anti-trafficking laws. You'd have to get legal counsel regarding how this might affect a visa or foreign citizenship.

Surrogacy isn't adoption. I had my children through surrogacy. They are my genetic children, and my name is on the birth certificate as the mother, just like everyone who gave birth to their own kids. Austria can deny *their own* citizens a lot of things-- like, they can refuse to give Austrian citizenship to a child of Austrian citizen parents, but born through surrogacy abroad. But assuming the OP is a US citizen and hires a US surrogate to have the baby in the US, and therefore has a US birth certificate listing her and spouse as the parents, and a US passport for the baby-- what is Austria going to do, exactly?

In many places, even in some US states where surrogacy is illegal, the legal mother is considered the woman who gave birth to the child. Hence the need for adoption by the genetic mother and of course good legal counsel depending on where the surrogate resides and where the birth takes place. But it sounds like the OP isn't interested in surrogacy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:From my understanding, surrogacy and embryo adoption are illegal in Austria, but egg donation is legal. So if you might be interested in trying another cycle with donor eggs, you should be able to do so with a local clinic once you arrive in Austria. Your child would be a US citizen only; they would not receive Austrian citizenship, and you would apply for a US consular certificate of birth abroad, together with a local Austrian certificate of birth. Then you can apply for the US passport, SSN etc. (I am an earlier poster who gave birth in Germany so I know this process).

You are correct also that many Europeans and American citizens living in Europe travel to the Czech Republic for IVF and surrogacy. IVF is about $5,000 and surrogacy is about $50,000 USD so prices are much lower in the Czech Republic than other parts of Europe and of course the United States.

Your other option is to hire a surrogate in the United States. You could travel back stateside for any milestone appointments and then of course for the birth and several weeks/months after when you will need to obtain the official documents necessary to bring your child back to Austria (passport, visa, SSN, adding child to employee’s insurance and orders/contract etc.). It does not matter if you are bringing a child to Austria from the United States as long as you have the proper documentation; there is no difference between whether you gave birth to the child, a surrogate did, or you adopted.

Where you may need to do a bit more research and potentially consult with a legal specialist is if you do hire a surrogate that is not located in your country of citizenship nor in your country of residence, and understanding how that process works to legally bring a child from the Czech Republic into Austria. I do know women who have been in a tiny bit of a similar situation; US citizens who were stationed with their husbands at a small military installation in Poland or Spain and were provided the option to come to the large american military hospital in Germany to deliver their babies as there was not care up to American standard at their locations. So people who did have a child in a different country from their citizenship and residence (though it was for biological birth and coordinated through the military). Your particulars (surrogate and not having affiliation with the US government) I think would require some further legal guidance. A good place to start would your / your spouse’s employer’s legal department and also the US Embassy in Austria.

Not OP. Thank you for this thorough information.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:From my understanding, surrogacy and embryo adoption are illegal in Austria, but egg donation is legal. So if you might be interested in trying another cycle with donor eggs, you should be able to do so with a local clinic once you arrive in Austria. Your child would be a US citizen only; they would not receive Austrian citizenship, and you would apply for a US consular certificate of birth abroad, together with a local Austrian certificate of birth. Then you can apply for the US passport, SSN etc. (I am an earlier poster who gave birth in Germany so I know this process).

You are correct also that many Europeans and American citizens living in Europe travel to the Czech Republic for IVF and surrogacy. IVF is about $5,000 and surrogacy is about $50,000 USD so prices are much lower in the Czech Republic than other parts of Europe and of course the United States.

Your other option is to hire a surrogate in the United States. You could travel back stateside for any milestone appointments and then of course for the birth and several weeks/months after when you will need to obtain the official documents necessary to bring your child back to Austria (passport, visa, SSN, adding child to employee’s insurance and orders/contract etc.). It does not matter if you are bringing a child to Austria from the United States as long as you have the proper documentation; there is no difference between whether you gave birth to the child, a surrogate did, or you adopted.

Where you may need to do a bit more research and potentially consult with a legal specialist is if you do hire a surrogate that is not located in your country of citizenship nor in your country of residence, and understanding how that process works to legally bring a child from the Czech Republic into Austria. I do know women who have been in a tiny bit of a similar situation; US citizens who were stationed with their husbands at a small military installation in Poland or Spain and were provided the option to come to the large american military hospital in Germany to deliver their babies as there was not care up to American standard at their locations. So people who did have a child in a different country from their citizenship and residence (though it was for biological birth and coordinated through the military). Your particulars (surrogate and not having affiliation with the US government) I think would require some further legal guidance. A good place to start would your / your spouse’s employer’s legal department and also the US Embassy in Austria.

Not OP. Thank you for this thorough information.

You’re welcome. We did IVF in Europe and I had my baby overseas and it is not an easy or straightforward process at all. Europe has such strict rules generally regarding ART and I had such a hard time finding any resources or authority about any part of the process, so when I’m able to give even a tiny bit of info that could help somebody else in a similar situation I am happy to!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

Why would it be?

Many countries have laws prohibiting going abroad for surrogacy, and they can and do prohibit the adoptive parents from taking the child back to their country. There are anti-surrogacy and anti-trafficking laws. You'd have to get legal counsel regarding how this might affect a visa or foreign citizenship.

Surrogacy isn't adoption. I had my children through surrogacy. They are my genetic children, and my name is on the birth certificate as the mother, just like everyone who gave birth to their own kids. Austria can deny *their own* citizens a lot of things-- like, they can refuse to give Austrian citizenship to a child of Austrian citizen parents, but born through surrogacy abroad. But assuming the OP is a US citizen and hires a US surrogate to have the baby in the US, and therefore has a US birth certificate listing her and spouse as the parents, and a US passport for the baby-- what is Austria going to do, exactly?

In many places, even in some US states where surrogacy is illegal, the legal mother is considered the woman who gave birth to the child. Hence the need for adoption by the genetic mother and of course good legal counsel depending on where the surrogate resides and where the birth takes place. But it sounds like the OP isn't interested in surrogacy.

PP you're responding to. I assumed that OP wasn't going to illegally hire a surrogate in Michigan through Craigslist. But yes, if you're a total moron and do something illegal, and don't have legal counsel, you might have to try to adopt your own surrogate baby.

You're the sort of person who can't ever admit they're wrong about something, aren't you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

Why would it be?

Many countries have laws prohibiting going abroad for surrogacy, and they can and do prohibit the adoptive parents from taking the child back to their country. There are anti-surrogacy and anti-trafficking laws. You'd have to get legal counsel regarding how this might affect a visa or foreign citizenship.

Surrogacy isn't adoption. I had my children through surrogacy. They are my genetic children, and my name is on the birth certificate as the mother, just like everyone who gave birth to their own kids. Austria can deny *their own* citizens a lot of things-- like, they can refuse to give Austrian citizenship to a child of Austrian citizen parents, but born through surrogacy abroad. But assuming the OP is a US citizen and hires a US surrogate to have the baby in the US, and therefore has a US birth certificate listing her and spouse as the parents, and a US passport for the baby-- what is Austria going to do, exactly?

In many places, even in some US states where surrogacy is illegal, the legal mother is considered the woman who gave birth to the child. Hence the need for adoption by the genetic mother and of course good legal counsel depending on where the surrogate resides and where the birth takes place. But it sounds like the OP isn't interested in surrogacy.

PP you're responding to. I assumed that OP wasn't going to illegally hire a surrogate in Michigan through Craigslist. But yes, if you're a total moron and do something illegal, and don't have legal counsel, you might have to try to adopt your own surrogate baby.

You're the sort of person who can't ever admit they're wrong about something, aren't you?

Or...you are upset that you can't control the language used when discussing surrogacy, which is prohibited in most places. Just own your choice and move on. Nobody judged you for it here, yet you're weirdly defensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:From my understanding, surrogacy and embryo adoption are illegal in Austria, but egg donation is legal. So if you might be interested in trying another cycle with donor eggs, you should be able to do so with a local clinic once you arrive in Austria. Your child would be a US citizen only; they would not receive Austrian citizenship, and you would apply for a US consular certificate of birth abroad, together with a local Austrian certificate of birth. Then you can apply for the US passport, SSN etc. (I am an earlier poster who gave birth in Germany so I know this process).

You are correct also that many Europeans and American citizens living in Europe travel to the Czech Republic for IVF and surrogacy. IVF is about $5,000 and surrogacy is about $50,000 USD so prices are much lower in the Czech Republic than other parts of Europe and of course the United States.

Your other option is to hire a surrogate in the United States. You could travel back stateside for any milestone appointments and then of course for the birth and several weeks/months after when you will need to obtain the official documents necessary to bring your child back to Austria (passport, visa, SSN, adding child to employee’s insurance and orders/contract etc.). It does not matter if you are bringing a child to Austria from the United States as long as you have the proper documentation; there is no difference between whether you gave birth to the child, a surrogate did, or you adopted.

Where you may need to do a bit more research and potentially consult with a legal specialist is if you do hire a surrogate that is not located in your country of citizenship nor in your country of residence, and understanding how that process works to legally bring a child from the Czech Republic into Austria. I do know women who have been in a tiny bit of a similar situation; US citizens who were stationed with their husbands at a small military installation in Poland or Spain and were provided the option to come to the large american military hospital in Germany to deliver their babies as there was not care up to American standard at their locations. So people who did have a child in a different country from their citizenship and residence (though it was for biological birth and coordinated through the military). Your particulars (surrogate and not having affiliation with the US government) I think would require some further legal guidance. A good place to start would your / your spouse’s employer’s legal department and also the US Embassy in Austria.

Not OP. Thank you for this thorough information.

This is OP and I wanted to say thanks too for taking the time to do such a thorough response. My husband will be working at the US Embassy in Vienna so I’m hopeful they will have some resources regarding doing IVF abroad. If the additional testing we’re doing doesn’t show any previously unknown issues then I will probably try donor egg again in case it was just bad luck the last time around.

[Anonymous]

^ Perfect. You’ll have all the official answers via his employment at the embassy. Great coincidence! Will be crossing fingers for you that you have success expanding your family, and enjoy the assignment. Austria is amazing!