Donor Cycle Failure - doctor recommends moving on to surrogate but that seems premature?

[Anonymous]

My vote is to pause and go to Europe to start fresh. Everything about the situation seems not ideal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My vote is to pause and go to Europe to start fresh. Everything about the situation seems not ideal.

Yup. Go elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

It is possible that there is scarring from your C-section that is causing some issues. Could you push for a hysteroscopy to take a look more closely? I would certainly combine the results from that with the results of the fragmentation test before deciding what to do.

Where in Europe are you moving? I did IVF in Germany while we were stationed there on military orders. We ultimately had success, but European countries with strict rules about PGS testing and surrogacy are also ones where the clinics often tend to have a sharp age cut off for clients. My clinic accepted me at age 36, I got pregnant and delivered at age 38. They do not take clients over 39 as rule of thumb so I was on the cusp even staring at “mid 30s.” I’m sure you will, but I would urge you to research as much as possible about the country where you are going to which can help inform whether you try to do another cycle or use a surrogate stateside before you go, or if there are clinics in the region you were going to who will take you on as a client over 40. I’m wishing you so much luck!

[Anonymous]

OP here - thanks to everyone for the helpful comments and words of support. We are moving to Austria for 3 years and I’ve done some research on clinics in the Czech Republic - the clinics there seem high quality and much cheaper than the US. Austria doesn’t allow donor eggs from what I’ve researched.

I scheduled a consult with a GYN surgical specialist about doing a laparoscopy to check for uterine issues, c-section scarring, etc. So hopefully the DNA fragmentation test and/or additional testing for me will shed some light.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is my story and I hope it helps someone. I was at SGF and had 6 miscarriages with my eggs and donor eggs that the doctor pushed on me. Then I lost my child at 18 weeks and they told me I couldn't carry my baby even though I had a biological child and carried him to full term. They refused to do a DNA fragmentation test and I pushed for it and paid out of pocket. Once we got the results my Dh had very high fragmentation. I went to cornell did IVF with my own eggs and before FET went to Chicago to Dr. summers to get a trans-abdominal cerclage. We just had our rainbow child last month. Please go to Cornell or CCRM colorado as SGF is not the best place they push for donor eggs and then surrogate prematurely.

Hi - OP here thanks for sharing your story. Did you do anything differently after finding out about the high DNA fragmentation? So happy you finally got your baby after all you went through.

[Anonymous]

Yes we worked with Doctor from CO to reduce his DNA fragmentation. They put him in a study we did that with CCRM Colorado. We still have 7 great embryos pgs tested left. At shady grove I would get only 1

[Anonymous]

Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

Why would it be?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

Why would it be?

Many countries have laws prohibiting going abroad for surrogacy, and they can and do prohibit the adoptive parents from taking the child back to their country. There are anti-surrogacy and anti-trafficking laws. You'd have to get legal counsel regarding how this might affect a visa or foreign citizenship.

[Anonymous]

also if you haven't, your husband should get karyotyping done; he could have a balanced translocation that the standard gene scan won't catch.

we did a 1:2 donor egg share at SGF, and out of 18 mature eggs only 10 fertilized and we only got three embryos to freeze, one of which was not PGT normal. pretty sure there are unknown male factor issues. miscarried the first FET at 9 weeks, still working on the last embryo now. fingers crossed.

[Anonymous]

We are in the same boat. 5 OE cycles with no success. Used frozen DE and got 3 blasts. First two did not stick. One more waiting to be transferred.

We had the DNA frag test done on our own because our RE doesn’t believe fragmentation matters. DH does have high fragmentation but DE was supposedly going to be the solution to my old eggs. Not so, clearly.

Would love to hear more about how PP’s husband improved his fragmentation.

[Anonymous]

To Colorado clinic CCRM let my husband participate in the study. His DNA fragmentation came down from 39% to 19%

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

Why would it be?

Many countries have laws prohibiting going abroad for surrogacy, and they can and do prohibit the adoptive parents from taking the child back to their country. There are anti-surrogacy and anti-trafficking laws. You'd have to get legal counsel regarding how this might affect a visa or foreign citizenship.

Surrogacy isn't adoption. I had my children through surrogacy. They are my genetic children, and my name is on the birth certificate as the mother, just like everyone who gave birth to their own kids. Austria can deny *their own* citizens a lot of things-- like, they can refuse to give Austrian citizenship to a child of Austrian citizen parents, but born through surrogacy abroad. But assuming the OP is a US citizen and hires a US surrogate to have the baby in the US, and therefore has a US birth certificate listing her and spouse as the parents, and a US passport for the baby-- what is Austria going to do, exactly?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surrogacy is awfully expensive. You could have the surrogate here in the US and simply fly the baby home to Austria. I know couples who have done that.

Isn't that still considered illegal?

Why would it be?

Many countries have laws prohibiting going abroad for surrogacy, and they can and do prohibit the adoptive parents from taking the child back to their country. There are anti-surrogacy and anti-trafficking laws. You'd have to get legal counsel regarding how this might affect a visa or foreign citizenship.

Surrogacy isn't adoption. I had my children through surrogacy. They are my genetic children, and my name is on the birth certificate as the mother, just like everyone who gave birth to their own kids. Austria can deny *their own* citizens a lot of things-- like, they can refuse to give Austrian citizenship to a child of Austrian citizen parents, but born through surrogacy abroad. But assuming the OP is a US citizen and hires a US surrogate to have the baby in the US, and therefore has a US birth certificate listing her and spouse as the parents, and a US passport for the baby-- what is Austria going to do, exactly?

A foreign country cannot deny you the right to bring your own children home from the United States. They cannot open sealed records regarding adoption / birth. People have been doing this for over 26 years. I know someone who did this. They were posted abroad at the time.