Coaches, why don't you call kids out for bad behavior?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

How about one better, teach your child to have thick skin and stop letting everything get to them. Teach them to fight back so they aren’t always the target. Leave the coach to coach and you teach your kid to stand up and say stop.

In an isolated case, yes. Repeatedly, no. Analogy: If you only ride your bike in your community and get a nail in your tire, plug your tire and move on. After the second nail, start looking for why this is happening and likely replace your tire. After the third, somebody better have a damn good reason for why they're dropping nails.
This isn't just a cosmetic issue in some cases. "Toughening up" is a partial solution, and it forgets the work that needs to be done with the bully. He/she has the potential to be a good adult. Only standing up to the bully and letting them think that it's acceptable behavior is also doing the bully a disservice in personal development - which is really the ultimate goal in youth sports.

The only thing you are responsible for “teaching” is how to have your kid stand up against it. Go to the club and ask for it to stop of it is truly bullying and not just some smack talk on the field. Coaches have nothing to do with teaching kids how to be good people and if it’s really bothering you then go speak with the mommy and daddy. Posting here is just a way for you or this poster to feel validated. Maybe the child is getting low self esteem from the parent/poster. I mean why else be on a gossip forum. Apple doesn’t fall short, hu?

Your point might be better made without bullying the poster you respond to
... hu(sic)?

Idiot! What is the definition of a bully? It’s definitely not one comment that has truth behind it.
For all of you that scream bullying but have no clue what that word means, here ya go.

*****What bullying is*****

1. Social Bullying-social exclusion from a group on purpose, spreading rumors, telling others not to be friends with someone, intentional isolation
2. Verbal Bullying-teasing, taunting, threats to cause harm targeting one or a group of individuals
3. Physical Bullying– hitting, kicking, spitting, tripping or pushing, breaking or stealing possessions or money
4. Cyber Bullying– spreading rumors online, sharing inappropriate information or pictures online, impersonation, threatening someone online, or “outing” someone publicly.

****What bullying is not*****

1. single episodes of social rejection or dislike
2. single episode acts of nastiness or spite
3. random acts of aggression or intimidation
4. mutual arguments, disagreements or fights

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

How about one better, teach your child to have thick skin and stop letting everything get to them. Teach them to fight back so they aren’t always the target. Leave the coach to coach and you teach your kid to stand up and say stop.

In an isolated case, yes. Repeatedly, no. Analogy: If you only ride your bike in your community and get a nail in your tire, plug your tire and move on. After the second nail, start looking for why this is happening and likely replace your tire. After the third, somebody better have a damn good reason for why they're dropping nails.
This isn't just a cosmetic issue in some cases. "Toughening up" is a partial solution, and it forgets the work that needs to be done with the bully. He/she has the potential to be a good adult. Only standing up to the bully and letting them think that it's acceptable behavior is also doing the bully a disservice in personal development - which is really the ultimate goal in youth sports.

The only thing you are responsible for “teaching” is how to have your kid stand up against it. Go to the club and ask for it to stop of it is truly bullying and not just some smack talk on the field. Coaches have nothing to do with teaching kids how to be good people and if it’s really bothering you then go speak with the mommy and daddy. Posting here is just a way for you or this poster to feel validated. Maybe the child is getting low self esteem from the parent/poster. I mean why else be on a gossip forum. Apple doesn’t fall short, hu?

Your point might be better made without bullying the poster you respond to
... hu(sic)?

Idiot! What is the definition of a bully? It’s definitely not one comment that has truth behind it.
For all of you that scream bullying but have no clue what that word means, here ya go.

*****What bullying is*****

1. Social Bullying-social exclusion from a group on purpose, spreading rumors, telling others not to be friends with someone, intentional isolation
2. Verbal Bullying-teasing, taunting, threats to cause harm targeting one or a group of individuals
3. Physical Bullying– hitting, kicking, spitting, tripping or pushing, breaking or stealing possessions or money
4. Cyber Bullying– spreading rumors online, sharing inappropriate information or pictures online, impersonation, threatening someone online, or “outing” someone publicly.

****What bullying is not*****

1. single episodes of social rejection or dislike
2. single episode acts of nastiness or spite
3. random acts of aggression or intimidation
4. mutual arguments, disagreements or fights

Seems to me you're squarely in the cyber-bullying category. Repeated name calling. Refusing to acknowledge others' valid points. And obsession with others. Yeah, you kind of proved everyone's point. Have a great day.

[Anonymous]

There is a kid on my son's team who is a complete ass to him. He tells my son that he is a worse player than him, that other kids on the team don't like him, and that he is a midget (my son is relatively short). When I complained to the coach, his response was that my son was a better player and has plenty of friends on the team, so we should not worry aobut it. But the truth vel non of what the kid is saying is not really the issue, in my view. It is behavior that should not be tolerated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is a kid on my son's team who is a complete ass to him. He tells my son that he is a worse player than him, that other kids on the team don't like him, and that he is a midget (my son is relatively short). When I complained to the coach, his response was that my son was a better player and has plenty of friends on the team, so we should not worry aobut it. But the truth vel non of what the kid is saying is not really the issue, in my view. It is behavior that should not be tolerated.

https://youtu.be/d-VpkK43_SQ

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is a kid on my son's team who is a complete ass to him. He tells my son that he is a worse player than him, that other kids on the team don't like him, and that he is a midget (my son is relatively short). When I complained to the coach, his response was that my son was a better player and has plenty of friends on the team, so we should not worry aobut it. But the truth vel non of what the kid is saying is not really the issue, in my view. It is behavior that should not be tolerated.

My teen son had a similar issue except that my son is tall and the aggressor is short. Coach had similar response.

I first told my son to ignore it, then I saw how upset he was after every practice (kid always makes ass comments) so I told him I fully support him to go up to the kid's face and tell him to F#$% Off! He did.

Ass kid still makes comments but not towards my son.

I still don't know why coach tolerates/dismiss it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a kid on my son's team who is a complete ass to him. He tells my son that he is a worse player than him, that other kids on the team don't like him, and that he is a midget (my son is relatively short). When I complained to the coach, his response was that my son was a better player and has plenty of friends on the team, so we should not worry aobut it. But the truth vel non of what the kid is saying is not really the issue, in my view. It is behavior that should not be tolerated.

My teen son had a similar issue except that my son is tall and the aggressor is short. Coach had similar response.

I first told my son to ignore it, then I saw how upset he was after every practice (kid always makes ass comments) so I told him I fully support him to go up to the kid's face and tell him to F#$% Off! He did.

Ass kid still makes comments but not towards my son.

I still don't know why coach tolerates/dismiss it.

Why does your son continue to tolerate it?
He will earn more respect from his teammates , coaches, and the bully if he steps up and fights back rather than tell on people and have his parents fight his battles.