Coaches, why don't you call kids out for bad behavior?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm talking about name calling, and physical aggression. Not the occasional goofing off.

Coaches are afraid of parents. And it’s not just in sports. It’s any competitive group activity. We saw racism and sexism from tweens in the team STEM activities that my daughter did. Some coaches spoke up after I started speaking publicly about it. Others were just too scared of the other parents.

[Anonymous]

Depending on the club, coaches are also afraid of losing top players. Winning is everything for some of these clubs and you can't piss off parents or top kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depending on the club, coaches are also afraid of losing top players. Winning is everything for some of these clubs and you can't piss off parents or top kids.

Real world lesson that certain people are allowed to be abusive.

[Anonymous]

Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

How about one better, teach your child to have thick skin and stop letting everything get to them. Teach them to fight back so they aren’t always the target. Leave the coach to coach and you teach your kid to stand up and say stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

How about one better, teach your child to have thick skin and stop letting everything get to them. Teach them to fight back so they aren’t always the target. Leave the coach to coach and you teach your kid to stand up and say stop.

In an isolated case, yes. Repeatedly, no. Analogy: If you only ride your bike in your community and get a nail in your tire, plug your tire and move on. After the second nail, start looking for why this is happening and likely replace your tire. After the third, somebody better have a damn good reason for why they're dropping nails.
This isn't just a cosmetic issue in some cases. "Toughening up" is a partial solution, and it forgets the work that needs to be done with the bully. He/she has the potential to be a good adult. Only standing up to the bully and letting them think that it's acceptable behavior is also doing the bully a disservice in personal development - which is really the ultimate goal in youth sports.

[Anonymous]

I do. If the parents won’t do it, then I will. If they don’t like it, they can take their obnoxious kid off the team or help out we can always use the help. I’m not a babysitter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

How about one better, teach your child to have thick skin and stop letting everything get to them. Teach them to fight back so they aren’t always the target. Leave the coach to coach and you teach your kid to stand up and say stop.

In an isolated case, yes. Repeatedly, no. Analogy: If you only ride your bike in your community and get a nail in your tire, plug your tire and move on. After the second nail, start looking for why this is happening and likely replace your tire. After the third, somebody better have a damn good reason for why they're dropping nails.
This isn't just a cosmetic issue in some cases. "Toughening up" is a partial solution, and it forgets the work that needs to be done with the bully. He/she has the potential to be a good adult. Only standing up to the bully and letting them think that it's acceptable behavior is also doing the bully a disservice in personal development - which is really the ultimate goal in youth sports.

The only thing you are responsible for “teaching” is how to have your kid stand up against it. Go to the club and ask for it to stop of it is truly bullying and not just some smack talk on the field. Coaches have nothing to do with teaching kids how to be good people and if it’s really bothering you then go speak with the mommy and daddy. Posting here is just a way for you or this poster to feel validated. Maybe the child is getting low self esteem from the parent/poster. I mean why else be on a gossip forum. Apple doesn’t fall short, hu?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

How about one better, teach your child to have thick skin and stop letting everything get to them. Teach them to fight back so they aren’t always the target. Leave the coach to coach and you teach your kid to stand up and say stop.

In an isolated case, yes. Repeatedly, no. Analogy: If you only ride your bike in your community and get a nail in your tire, plug your tire and move on. After the second nail, start looking for why this is happening and likely replace your tire. After the third, somebody better have a damn good reason for why they're dropping nails.
This isn't just a cosmetic issue in some cases. "Toughening up" is a partial solution, and it forgets the work that needs to be done with the bully. He/she has the potential to be a good adult. Only standing up to the bully and letting them think that it's acceptable behavior is also doing the bully a disservice in personal development - which is really the ultimate goal in youth sports.

The only thing you are responsible for “teaching” is how to have your kid stand up against it. Go to the club and ask for it to stop of it is truly bullying and not just some smack talk on the field. Coaches have nothing to do with teaching kids how to be good people and if it’s really bothering you then go speak with the mommy and daddy. Posting here is just a way for you or this poster to feel validated. Maybe the child is getting low self esteem from the parent/poster. I mean why else be on a gossip forum. Apple doesn’t fall short, hu?

Your point might be better made without bullying the poster you respond to
... hu(sic)?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

How about one better, teach your child to have thick skin and stop letting everything get to them. Teach them to fight back so they aren’t always the target. Leave the coach to coach and you teach your kid to stand up and say stop.

In an isolated case, yes. Repeatedly, no. Analogy: If you only ride your bike in your community and get a nail in your tire, plug your tire and move on. After the second nail, start looking for why this is happening and likely replace your tire. After the third, somebody better have a damn good reason for why they're dropping nails.
This isn't just a cosmetic issue in some cases. "Toughening up" is a partial solution, and it forgets the work that needs to be done with the bully. He/she has the potential to be a good adult. Only standing up to the bully and letting them think that it's acceptable behavior is also doing the bully a disservice in personal development - which is really the ultimate goal in youth sports.

The only thing you are responsible for “teaching” is how to have your kid stand up against it. Go to the club and ask for it to stop of it is truly bullying and not just some smack talk on the field. Coaches have nothing to do with teaching kids how to be good people and if it’s really bothering you then go speak with the mommy and daddy. Posting here is just a way for you or this poster to feel validated. Maybe the child is getting low self esteem from the parent/poster. I mean why else be on a gossip forum. Apple doesn’t fall short, hu?

You're dead wrong. If your coach isn't invested in making your kid a better person, it's time to find a new coach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

How about one better, teach your child to have thick skin and stop letting everything get to them. Teach them to fight back so they aren’t always the target. Leave the coach to coach and you teach your kid to stand up and say stop.

In an isolated case, yes. Repeatedly, no. Analogy: If you only ride your bike in your community and get a nail in your tire, plug your tire and move on. After the second nail, start looking for why this is happening and likely replace your tire. After the third, somebody better have a damn good reason for why they're dropping nails.
This isn't just a cosmetic issue in some cases. "Toughening up" is a partial solution, and it forgets the work that needs to be done with the bully. He/she has the potential to be a good adult. Only standing up to the bully and letting them think that it's acceptable behavior is also doing the bully a disservice in personal development - which is really the ultimate goal in youth sports.

The only thing you are responsible for “teaching” is how to have your kid stand up against it. Go to the club and ask for it to stop of it is truly bullying and not just some smack talk on the field. Coaches have nothing to do with teaching kids how to be good people and if it’s really bothering you then go speak with the mommy and daddy. Posting here is just a way for you or this poster to feel validated. Maybe the child is getting low self esteem from the parent/poster. I mean why else be on a gossip forum. Apple doesn’t fall short, hu?

You're dead wrong. If your coach isn't invested in making your kid a better person, it's time to find a new coach.

LOL!

[Anonymous]

could be because its your star player who has a big head

[Anonymous]

Coach here. Some, some don't. I've noticed a lot of coaches often teach the game as they were taught; if it wasn't instilled in them it is likely they won't instill it in others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why isn't your kids fighting back? I am not saying the "bullying" is ok. But coach or no coach why isn't your kid defending themself?

How about one better, teach your child to have thick skin and stop letting everything get to them. Teach them to fight back so they aren’t always the target. Leave the coach to coach and you teach your kid to stand up and say stop.

In an isolated case, yes. Repeatedly, no. Analogy: If you only ride your bike in your community and get a nail in your tire, plug your tire and move on. After the second nail, start looking for why this is happening and likely replace your tire. After the third, somebody better have a damn good reason for why they're dropping nails.
This isn't just a cosmetic issue in some cases. "Toughening up" is a partial solution, and it forgets the work that needs to be done with the bully. He/she has the potential to be a good adult. Only standing up to the bully and letting them think that it's acceptable behavior is also doing the bully a disservice in personal development - which is really the ultimate goal in youth sports.

The only thing you are responsible for “teaching” is how to have your kid stand up against it. Go to the club and ask for it to stop of it is truly bullying and not just some smack talk on the field. Coaches have nothing to do with teaching kids how to be good people and if it’s really bothering you then go speak with the mommy and daddy. Posting here is just a way for you or this poster to feel validated. Maybe the child is getting low self esteem from the parent/poster. I mean why else be on a gossip forum. Apple doesn’t fall short, hu?

Your point might be better made without bullying the poster you respond to
... hu(sic)?

Yep...this is the typical mentality of an angry, entitled white guy.

[Anonymous]

As a coach, I consider bad behavior an essential part of the sport, and I encourage it in the teams I am coaching- Lots of flopping and whining to the refs about calls.