Why are nannies treated like both hourly and salaried employees?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread has really made me feel good about my decision to take a few years off when my DD was born. Employing a professional nanny, who works in your home and cares fir your children, is just an extremely fraught situation. Very few people have the temperament for it. And a lot of people stretch for the nanny instead of daycare (especially during Covid) but then want to nickel and dime the arrangement.

I fully agree with the long post from the nanny up thread and I think it’s funny how many of you are disagreeing. This is just the situation. If you don’t like it, your options are daycare or a SAHP, both of which come with their own drawbacks. People who whine about stuff like this are so entitled— sorry you can’t treat your nanny like Home Depot treats it’s cashiers? Sorry you e arranged your life to be 100% reliant in this person and she expects to be compensated accordingly?

This is very much a situation where you have paid someone else to make your bed and now you have to lie in it.

I’m an emergency room physician who is hourly - you’re the ridiculous one to just think hourly = cashier. I get paid for the hours I work, and don’t get paid for hours I don’t work by choice (eg refusing to come in when a safe way has been provided). I much prefer to be hourly so I can keep fix the hours I agree to work vs be worked to the bone like some salaried people. But no I would never expect to be paid for my time if I declined to for in and help care for your mom with covid

I addressed this already, but again, if you take time off, your shift can be filled by anyone else qualified to do your job. There are not emotional and logistical reasons that you and only you can care for my hypothetical sick mom. My point is that the difference between “our usual ER physician” and “a fill-in ER physician” is smaller than “our nanny” and “someone else’s nanny who can fill in today.”

The specific nature of the job means that knowing things like the nap routine for the baby, how to log in to online school, the exact little dance your potty-training toddler does when he is about to pee his pants, what foods they will eat, etc., are really individual and personal to any given family. So if someone fills in the care that the day will be different than it would with the regular nanny in ways that impact the employer. Maybe small things like hungry, overtired kids or missing an online class or assignment or fielding a call about where to find XYZ mid-meeting, but still inconvenient. The more lead time you have to plan a nanny’s day off, the better you can arrange to either take time off yourself or to have the nanny train her replacement. If we treated nannies like typical hourly employees with limited or no PTO and nannies just turned down a shift if they didn’t want to work that day, families would end up being inconvenienced. The way to avoid that is to offer PTO in the contract but require a certain amount of notice.


At the end of the day, though it comes down to this: the market will bear what the market will bear. If you resent having to pay for PTO for your nanny, try to renegotiate the contract. If you do, you may end up needing to hire a different nanny. Since we are so interchangeable, that should be nbd, right?

[Anonymous]

Why do you all think nannies aren’t replaceable? My kids have been perfectly happy with temp nannies and drop in care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread has really made me feel good about my decision to take a few years off when my DD was born. Employing a professional nanny, who works in your home and cares fir your children, is just an extremely fraught situation. Very few people have the temperament for it. And a lot of people stretch for the nanny instead of daycare (especially during Covid) but then want to nickel and dime the arrangement.

I fully agree with the long post from the nanny up thread and I think it’s funny how many of you are disagreeing. This is just the situation. If you don’t like it, your options are daycare or a SAHP, both of which come with their own drawbacks. People who whine about stuff like this are so entitled— sorry you can’t treat your nanny like Home Depot treats it’s cashiers? Sorry you e arranged your life to be 100% reliant in this person and she expects to be compensated accordingly?

This is very much a situation where you have paid someone else to make your bed and now you have to lie in it.

I’m an emergency room physician who is hourly - you’re the ridiculous one to just think hourly = cashier. I get paid for the hours I work, and don’t get paid for hours I don’t work by choice (eg refusing to come in when a safe way has been provided). I much prefer to be hourly so I can keep fix the hours I agree to work vs be worked to the bone like some salaried people. But no I would never expect to be paid for my time if I declined to for in and help care for your mom with covid

I addressed this already, but again, if you take time off, your shift can be filled by anyone else qualified to do your job. There are not emotional and logistical reasons that you and only you can care for my hypothetical sick mom. My point is that the difference between “our usual ER physician” and “a fill-in ER physician” is smaller than “our nanny” and “someone else’s nanny who can fill in today.”

The specific nature of the job means that knowing things like the nap routine for the baby, how to log in to online school, the exact little dance your potty-training toddler does when he is about to pee his pants, what foods they will eat, etc., are really individual and personal to any given family. So if someone fills in the care that the day will be different than it would with the regular nanny in ways that impact the employer. Maybe small things like hungry, overtired kids or missing an online class or assignment or fielding a call about where to find XYZ mid-meeting, but still inconvenient. The more lead time you have to plan a nanny’s day off, the better you can arrange to either take time off yourself or to have the nanny train her replacement. If we treated nannies like typical hourly employees with limited or no PTO and nannies just turned down a shift if they didn’t want to work that day, families would end up being inconvenienced. The way to avoid that is to offer PTO in the contract but require a certain amount of notice.


At the end of the day, though it comes down to this: the market will bear what the market will bear. If you resent having to pay for PTO for your nanny, try to renegotiate the contract. If you do, you may end up needing to hire a different nanny. Since we are so interchangeable, that should be nbd, right?

I don’t know why you think you’re less replaceable than doctor or an electrician, plumber, etc. my kids have been very happy with temp care or a new babysitter. In fact sometimes they are even happier with someone new! Your premise is flawed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you all think nannies aren’t replaceable? My kids have been perfectly happy with temp nannies and drop in care.

Wonderful! You have a system that works for you!

Your experience doesn’t match my experience. When I take a day off my employers are texting throughout the day to figure out where the backup diapers are and what time exactly pickup is at preschool and oh by the way what do you have planned for dinner? And most of my employers over the 15 years I’ve nannied have been like that. I even had a sub who couldn’t get an infant to take a bottle at all and mom had to take an extra hour at lunch to come home and nurse.

I am sure since everyone who posts here is well-adjusted and mature that anyone whining about paying PTO for their hourly wage nanny is just like you, and not like my many many employers who want someone to run their entire household.

[Anonymous]

I work at a place that has a lot of hourly workers, and they are in no way interchangeable. Nannying is an important skilled job, but there are many important skilled jobs that are hourly.

At my workplace, if we close when you’re scheduled to work, you get paid. If we are open and you don’t show up, you don’t get paid. Snow days are a bit of a gray area because it’s the family that’s deciding if they’re “open” or not. That relies on you to be sensible and humane. But when you offered safe transportation, assuming it really was safe, the nanny should have either, or not been paid

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a TOTAL RACKET, OP. Anecdotally and in my experience with my own nanny, I think a lot of nannies in our area are way too empowered and that over time, they do less and expect more. Over it. Can't wait to age out of the nanny years.

(Cue all the outrage, snark and name calling that will surely come from all the moms on here who let their nannies steam roll them because they don't want to actually parent their own kids.)

No name-calling or snark. Definitely some outrage seeing an adult refer to and generalizing about a group of other adults as being “too empowered”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a TOTAL RACKET, OP. Anecdotally and in my experience with my own nanny, I think a lot of nannies in our area are way too empowered and that over time, they do less and expect more. Over it. Can't wait to age out of the nanny years.

(Cue all the outrage, snark and name calling that will surely come from all the moms on here who let their nannies steam roll them because they don't want to actually parent their own kids.)

No name-calling or snark. Definitely some outrage seeing an adult refer to and generalizing about a group of other adults as being “too empowered”.

I meant to say entitled. Just noticed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For the record we pay our nanny very well and do all these things. I just get frustrated when at times (like the huge snow storm where nanny can’t make it in and then refuses to come in again the next day despite being offered safe transportation here) that I’m always supposed to pay her no matter what but also supposed to pay for every minute over our schedule on a given day.

Hourly employees generally have the benefit of overtime pay and being paid for every minute worked. The drawback is they don’t get a lot of paid vacation, generally don’t get paid for time they don’t work, and can be subject to schedule changes.

Salaried employees get the benefit of paid vacation and paid holidays. They get paid whether or not they’re able to show up and do their job. The drawback is they don’t get paid extra for every minute they work over their regular schedule in a given day.

My husbands job is one and mine is the other. It feels like nannies get both. And yes I’m partially just frustrated at the moment that dh wasn’t able to do his job and therefore wasn’t paid bc our nanny wouldn’t come in with provided transportation or stay overnight to prevent this problem (she doesn’t have kids or pets) but we still have to pay her. I in no way think nannies should be poorly paid or paid off the books or nickled and dimed, but I also don’t think they have some special status that elevates things above literally all over workers at regular companies.

If she refused to come in when you offered her ways to do so, and one of you must work or not get paid, you should have included clauses about attendance during foul weather in your contract.

You are justified in being upset. I am a nanny, and refusing to come in to work when I am offered a way to do so means no pay for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are not just any employees, these are the women who are watching your most precious treasures. Treat them with kindness and humanity. The distain some of you have for these ladies is very disconcerting. If you don't want to pay them, fine, but they will go somewhere where they are treated better.

Blah, blah, blah.

Someone with your lack of class doesn't need a nanny. Sounds like a public daycare is more at your level.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the record we pay our nanny very well and do all these things. I just get frustrated when at times (like the huge snow storm where nanny can’t make it in and then refuses to come in again the next day despite being offered safe transportation here) that I’m always supposed to pay her no matter what but also supposed to pay for every minute over our schedule on a given day.

Hourly employees generally have the benefit of overtime pay and being paid for every minute worked. The drawback is they don’t get a lot of paid vacation, generally don’t get paid for time they don’t work, and can be subject to schedule changes.

Salaried employees get the benefit of paid vacation and paid holidays. They get paid whether or not they’re able to show up and do their job. The drawback is they don’t get paid extra for every minute they work over their regular schedule in a given day.

My husbands job is one and mine is the other. It feels like nannies get both. And yes I’m partially just frustrated at the moment that dh wasn’t able to do his job and therefore wasn’t paid bc our nanny wouldn’t come in with provided transportation or stay overnight to prevent this problem (she doesn’t have kids or pets) but we still have to pay her. I in no way think nannies should be poorly paid or paid off the books or nickled and dimed, but I also don’t think they have some special status that elevates things above literally all over workers at regular companies.

If she refused to come in when you offered her ways to do so, and one of you must work or not get paid, you should have included clauses about attendance during foul weather in your contract.

You are justified in being upset. I am a nanny, and refusing to come in to work when I am offered a way to do so means no pay for me.

I agree. OP, you need to amend your contract to say that she needs to notify you by a certain time if she feels she can’t safely reach you via her normal transportation, and that you will provide alternative safe transportation. If she chooses not to come to work, she will not be paid.

Many hourly workers are “required attendance” in my neck of the woods (as are the salaried workers). Snow doesn’t mean a day off for all of us. Those of us in essential jobs, like health care and child care, need to put on our boots and slog through the snow. You’re generous in offering to arrange transportation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would offer the option of flex time for snow days. She can choose to come in or make up the hours over the next month by staying late or coming in early.

I would not agree to that, but if you send an SUV to drive me to your house, I’ll agree to that. My modest car is small and not equipped for snow.

Why not? I use flex time and I have a professional job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a TOTAL RACKET, OP. Anecdotally and in my experience with my own nanny, I think a lot of nannies in our area are way too empowered and that over time, they do less and expect more. Over it. Can't wait to age out of the nanny years.

(Cue all the outrage, snark and name calling that will surely come from all the moms on here who let their nannies steam roll them because they don't want to actually parent their own kids.)

I think you’re confused, ma’am...

Troll posing as an MB got tripped up.

[Anonymous]

I’m curious, how does one arrange safe transportation that doesn’t mean you have to go and get them yourself? Uber and Lyft? How safe is that during Covid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work at a place that has a lot of hourly workers, and they are in no way interchangeable. Nannying is an important skilled job, but there are many important skilled jobs that are hourly.

At my workplace, if we close when you’re scheduled to work, you get paid. If we are open and you don’t show up, you don’t get paid. Snow days are a bit of a gray area because it’s the family that’s deciding if they’re “open” or not. That relies on you to be sensible and humane. But when you offered safe transportation, assuming it really was safe, the nanny should have either, or not been paid

Yeah, I don't get why this person is so invested in hourly jobs generally involving interchangeable employees. There are plenty of hourly jobs that require employees to not just have specific skills, but also knowledge of workplace logistics, procedures, and even personalities, such that someone who technically has the skills but lacks the specific experience in that workplace can't just smoothly step in. It's really not helping her case.

[Anonymous]

It is kind of frustrating. We don’t live in DC but when we first hired our nanny, she was rock solid reliable and we only paid her for hours worked. She was very motivated to work, and even stepped up wanting to work overtime on the weekends frequently.

After her first year, we adopted the norms on this board of paying her for time off. Over time, as she realized that we’d still pay her if she didn’t come to work for various reasons, I sure noticed her getting “sick” a lot more frequently or being “concerned” about driving in the snow. She’s still reliable for the most part, but manages to figure out how to get a lot more paid time off and is never interested in overtime anymore.

She was much more reliable and motivated when we only paid for hours worked vs. When we moved her onto a salary type of arrangement.