Does a gorgeous house ever make one truly happy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here — I love houses and interior design and my house is pretty gorgeous. When we moved to this city, I said “ I want to live in only this street,” and so we rented there. Then my favorite house on the street went up for sale and here we are.

However, I do have a tendency to blame things on houses and to look for excuses to move. It’s sad! It’s like I love houses so much that I expect too much from them or something and then I get disappointed.

I completely identify with this, OP. I’m on my 4th house. I think this might be “the one”, but I’ll never stop looking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here — I love houses and interior design and my house is pretty gorgeous. When we moved to this city, I said “ I want to live in only this street,” and so we rented there. Then my favorite house on the street went up for sale and here we are.

However, I do have a tendency to blame things on houses and to look for excuses to move. It’s sad! It’s like I love houses so much that I expect too much from them or something and then I get disappointed.

I'm an interior designer and so I obviously love houses, but honestly I care very little about possessions. I don't have any attachment to our furniture or items, even those pieces we found overseas or that were in my kids' bedrooms. I could leave our house, which I think is gorgeous, and everything and not feel sad. Our homes serve as creative expression, and that can lift our spirits and give us purpose. But, a house can't make you happy. Only your thoughts can make you happy. Besides, it's impossible to be happy all the time, no matter what. Try journaling, meditation, gratitude, and CBT. They all help me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think a gorgeous house makes one happy.

I do think a house that is functional and not cluttered makes one happy. But that could just be me.

I agree that functional and uncluttered are key. I think at best it can boost your mood and remove impediments to being happy, but "true happiness" is a lot to put on a house. What about family, work, community, etc? You can be happy despite a less than ideal space with those things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I live in a house that is over 100 years old. We bought it with the intention of renovating it. Nothing over the top, but nice and cozy. As soon as we moved in, my husband quit his job (he had a trust fund) and will not allow us to put one penny into it. It is an absolute dump and I am filled with resentment toward my husband every single day. We cannote entertain and my kids won't have friends over. A nice house would have helped a lot. A nasty house is not good for us at all.

Oh noooo! I'm sorry PP! We just moved into a 130 year old house last month and we're definitely spending a lot of time and money getting it fixed up. Can he DIY some of the work given that he has so much free time?

[Anonymous]

Function is so important. Your house has the systems that get you through the day. Do I always have clean clothes ready for me in the morning because my closet is organized and my laundry system works? Is it easy to make breakfast because the kitchen is clean and laid out well? When I want to chillax in the evening, is the TV at the right height for viewing from a comfortable seat? If friends are coming over instead, do we have a comfortable place to sit and talk with drinks in reach and flattering/comfortable lighting? Do I have a spot for my hobby with everything I need easily accessible? Etc etc.

[Anonymous]

I've been thinking about this. We're older, and recently left our house of decades for an apartment. We'd equipped the house with high-quality appliances, plumbing fixtures, technology, etc.

We've moved to an apartment, a rental, that's large and has a lot of light. Appliances etc are okay, but definitely not what I'd choose. Walls are white and fixtures are basic.

We're pretty content here. Somehow the fact that I've had the nicer things makes the lack of them okay. Basic needs are provided for. There's a lot of relief in knowing we aren't responsible for the random things that go wrong in a house.

BUT, I still feel a bit of regret that I never really had the kitchen I wanted. Go figure.

[Anonymous]

It's about "fit".

If your home makes you happy, it means it has your priorities in mind. Personally, I need a home filled with natural light. This means there isn't as much wall space to put furniture or art. But I'm willing to make that compromise.

[Anonymous]

I had six siblings growing up and our various houses affected our moods. I don't take this issue lightly.
The one we liked the most was large, with good light, and a good functional kitchen that my mother never complained about. Nice yard, lots of interesting landscaping.
The house that we were most unhappy in was small, too cold in the winter, too hot in the summer, low ceilings, too close to a main road, with an uninspiring garden.

[Anonymous]

Less so on the home, more so on the yard. Having a great and relaxing outdoor space can make all the difference when the house is “fine”.

[Anonymous]

Gorgeous isn’t the word I’d use, but the work we’ve done in our home absolutely creates a relaxing and comfortable space for us.

[Anonymous]

All I know is, we moved back in December but put up our artwork (from our old home) in stages between April-September. Every time a new beautiful piece goes up, it makes me so happy!

[Anonymous]

How I decorate and live within my house makes me happy, because it is filled with the colors and furniture I like, books, artwork, music, foods I cook and bake etc.

[Anonymous]

We bought a small fixer upper in a great location. It took us several years to pull the trigger on a major renovation. In the end, we got much better functionality AND aesthetic improvement. It makes us happy whenever we come home from a weekend away. The emotional reaction we have to it definitely supports the theory that having a nice house makes one happy.

[Anonymous]

I love my historic home. It's not huge, but I do not need a BIG house to clean and maintain. It's perfect for us, and I've loved working from home for 4 1/2 years, mainly due to how much I love this house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's a lot of research about how buildings affect our health and productivity due to things like natural light, types of light bulbs, views, access to nature, ventilation, etc. I think it could be argued that well-designed spaces improve our lives, including our psychological well-being. But "gorgeous" is in the eye of the beholder and hard to quantify.

This is the correct answer

+17

I &$%# LOVE my house and it makes me happy to look at the outside, sit on the inside, walk from room to room ... I've lived in it 20 years and I still marvel at what a beautiful, graceful structure it is.

That said, I suspect a lot of DCUMs wouldn't feel the same because the house has, say, many moderate-size rooms vs. open concept.

To answer OP, I say "yes." Once you live in a residence that YOU find inspirational, yes that does make you happier.