Men... in a casual relationship is this text too forward or just right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:August? You’re insane to wait so long.

OP here. I am going away mid June for 6-8 weeks. I won't see him before then. But it'll be good when it happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:August? You’re insane to wait so long.

OP here. I am going away mid June for 6-8 weeks. I won't see him before then. But it'll be good when it happens.

So you're divorced or always single?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:August? You’re insane to wait so long.

OP here. I am going away mid June for 6-8 weeks. I won't see him before then. But it'll be good when it happens.

So you're divorced or always single?

We're both divorced, me for 7 years, him recently.

[Anonymous]

This is a FWB right? WHy are you doing all this thinking over a text to a man you just smash every now and again?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP how old are you and him?
Like are you single, hoping to be married one day? Or in a totally different place?

I'm old so take my advice with a grain of salt.. but don't give your heart to guys who won't give you more than FWB. You're worth more than that and you will find someone better who will give you more than that. I know far too many people who wasted prime years in this kind of arrangement instead of dating stand up guys and ended up being single/no kids in their 40's. It is rarely fun for the woman.

You know, ma'am, some women are looking for a FWB, even if the man wants more.

Or tell themselves that. Because this woman clearly wants more or she wouldn't be on a MB posting about it and stressing about how it will come off. Woman are wired to want an emotional connection with sex and can rarely separate the two. Extended FB and FWB don't work for women. Every single one of my friends who spent their 30's in these relationships are single in their 40's and desperately want a partner and kids.

Female here, single early 50’s, serial FWB participant. Fell for a few of them...of course, it never was more than FWB. Agonized over texts messages to the ones I liked. The last one, I really liked, looked desparate and insecure. Learned so many lessons with FWB....never again. But I know everyone is different. But agree with you, complete waste of time....and heartache sometimes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP how old are you and him?
Like are you single, hoping to be married one day? Or in a totally different place?

I'm old so take my advice with a grain of salt.. but don't give your heart to guys who won't give you more than FWB. You're worth more than that and you will find someone better who will give you more than that. I know far too many people who wasted prime years in this kind of arrangement instead of dating stand up guys and ended up being single/no kids in their 40's. It is rarely fun for the woman.

You know, ma'am, some women are looking for a FWB, even if the man wants more.

Or tell themselves that. Because this woman clearly wants more or she wouldn't be on a MB posting about it and stressing about how it will come off. Woman are wired to want an emotional connection with sex and can rarely separate the two. Extended FB and FWB don't work for women. Every single one of my friends who spent their 30's in these relationships are single in their 40's and desperately want a partner and kids.

Female here, single early 50’s, serial FWB participant. Fell for a few of them...of course, it never was more than FWB. Agonized over texts messages to the ones I liked. The last one, I really liked, looked desparate and insecure. Learned so many lessons with FWB....never again. But I know everyone is different. But agree with you, complete waste of time....and heartache sometimes.

Think the important part of these relationships is the FRIENDSHIP. I am also in my 50s, and I have 2 FWB. If the sex went away, one guy and I would still be best friends. The other one, I would probably never hear from him again, so he's not that important to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP how old are you and him?
Like are you single, hoping to be married one day? Or in a totally different place?

I'm old so take my advice with a grain of salt.. but don't give your heart to guys who won't give you more than FWB. You're worth more than that and you will find someone better who will give you more than that. I know far too many people who wasted prime years in this kind of arrangement instead of dating stand up guys and ended up being single/no kids in their 40's. It is rarely fun for the woman.

You know, ma'am, some women are looking for a FWB, even if the man wants more.

Or tell themselves that. Because this woman clearly wants more or she wouldn't be on a MB posting about it and stressing about how it will come off. Woman are wired to want an emotional connection with sex and can rarely separate the two. Extended FB and FWB don't work for women. Every single one of my friends who spent their 30's in these relationships are single in their 40's and desperately want a partner and kids.

Female here, single early 50’s, serial FWB participant. Fell for a few of them...of course, it never was more than FWB. Agonized over texts messages to the ones I liked. The last one, I really liked, looked desparate and insecure. Learned so many lessons with FWB....never again. But I know everyone is different. But agree with you, complete waste of time....and heartache sometimes.

Think the important part of these relationships is the FRIENDSHIP. I am also in my 50s, and I have 2 FWB. If the sex went away, one guy and I would still be best friends. The other one, I would probably never hear from him again, so he's not that important to me.

Either way would you be wringing your hands over sending them a text?

[Anonymous]

Isn’t the whole point of having a FWB is that you don’t need to overthink this stuff? If he hasn’t reached out to you this whole time, then he’s clearly not a friend with or without benefits and he’s just not into you. So, this is really just an offer for a booty call. Who cares that much about the wording of a booty call?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP how old are you and him?
Like are you single, hoping to be married one day? Or in a totally different place?

I'm old so take my advice with a grain of salt.. but don't give your heart to guys who won't give you more than FWB. You're worth more than that and you will find someone better who will give you more than that. I know far too many people who wasted prime years in this kind of arrangement instead of dating stand up guys and ended up being single/no kids in their 40's. It is rarely fun for the woman.

You know, ma'am, some women are looking for a FWB, even if the man wants more.

Or tell themselves that. Because this woman clearly wants more or she wouldn't be on a MB posting about it and stressing about how it will come off. Woman are wired to want an emotional connection with sex and can rarely separate the two. Extended FB and FWB don't work for women. Every single one of my friends who spent their 30's in these relationships are single in their 40's and desperately want a partner and kids.

Female here, single early 50’s, serial FWB participant. Fell for a few of them...of course, it never was more than FWB. Agonized over texts messages to the ones I liked. The last one, I really liked, looked desparate and insecure. Learned so many lessons with FWB....never again. But I know everyone is different. But agree with you, complete waste of time....and heartache sometimes.

Think the important part of these relationships is the FRIENDSHIP. I am also in my 50s, and I have 2 FWB. If the sex went away, one guy and I would still be best friends. The other one, I would probably never hear from him again, so he's not that important to me.

Either way would you be wringing your hands over sending them a text?

No, because the first one and I are friends, so why would I agonize over it, knowing I wouldn't ruin anything. And the second one, if it scared him off, so be it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP how old are you and him?
Like are you single, hoping to be married one day? Or in a totally different place?

I'm old so take my advice with a grain of salt.. but don't give your heart to guys who won't give you more than FWB. You're worth more than that and you will find someone better who will give you more than that. I know far too many people who wasted prime years in this kind of arrangement instead of dating stand up guys and ended up being single/no kids in their 40's. It is rarely fun for the woman.

You know, ma'am, some women are looking for a FWB, even if the man wants more.

Or tell themselves that. Because this woman clearly wants more or she wouldn't be on a MB posting about it and stressing about how it will come off. Woman are wired to want an emotional connection with sex and can rarely separate the two. Extended FB and FWB don't work for women. Every single one of my friends who spent their 30's in these relationships are single in their 40's and desperately want a partner and kids.

Female here, single early 50’s, serial FWB participant. Fell for a few of them...of course, it never was more than FWB. Agonized over texts messages to the ones I liked. The last one, I really liked, looked desparate and insecure. Learned so many lessons with FWB....never again. But I know everyone is different. But agree with you, complete waste of time....and heartache sometimes.

Think the important part of these relationships is the FRIENDSHIP. I am also in my 50s, and I have 2 FWB. If the sex went away, one guy and I would still be best friends. The other one, I would probably never hear from him again, so he's not that important to me.

Either way would you be wringing your hands over sending them a text?

No, because the first one and I are friends, so why would I agonize over it, knowing I wouldn't ruin anything. And the second one, if it scared him off, so be it.

Which brings us back around the point of this thread. OP is trying to parse the words of a text to a supposed FWB. That is the ultimate waste of time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP how old are you and him?
Like are you single, hoping to be married one day? Or in a totally different place?

I'm old so take my advice with a grain of salt.. but don't give your heart to guys who won't give you more than FWB. You're worth more than that and you will find someone better who will give you more than that. I know far too many people who wasted prime years in this kind of arrangement instead of dating stand up guys and ended up being single/no kids in their 40's. It is rarely fun for the woman.

You know, ma'am, some women are looking for a FWB, even if the man wants more.

Or tell themselves that. Because this woman clearly wants more or she wouldn't be on a MB posting about it and stressing about how it will come off. Woman are wired to want an emotional connection with sex and can rarely separate the two. Extended FB and FWB don't work for women. Every single one of my friends who spent their 30's in these relationships are single in their 40's and desperately want a partner and kids.

+1 This. I have nothing against FWB arrangements, but if you're uncoupled and looking to get married and have kids one day, you're incredibly dumb to be wasting your late 20s/30s time in one of these relationships.

You're going to get to your early 30s and the most desirable men will be off the market. Then you'll be faced with settling or being alone. I've seen this rodeo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP how old are you and him?
Like are you single, hoping to be married one day? Or in a totally different place?

I'm old so take my advice with a grain of salt.. but don't give your heart to guys who won't give you more than FWB. You're worth more than that and you will find someone better who will give you more than that. I know far too many people who wasted prime years in this kind of arrangement instead of dating stand up guys and ended up being single/no kids in their 40's. It is rarely fun for the woman.

You know, ma'am, some women are looking for a FWB, even if the man wants more.

Or tell themselves that. Because this woman clearly wants more or she wouldn't be on a MB posting about it and stressing about how it will come off. Woman are wired to want an emotional connection with sex and can rarely separate the two. Extended FB and FWB don't work for women. Every single one of my friends who spent their 30's in these relationships are single in their 40's and desperately want a partner and kids.

Female here, single early 50’s, serial FWB participant. Fell for a few of them...of course, it never was more than FWB. Agonized over texts messages to the ones I liked. The last one, I really liked, looked desparate and insecure. Learned so many lessons with FWB....never again. But I know everyone is different. But agree with you, complete waste of time....and heartache sometimes.

Think the important part of these relationships is the FRIENDSHIP. I am also in my 50s, and I have 2 FWB. If the sex went away, one guy and I would still be best friends. The other one, I would probably never hear from him again, so he's not that important to me.

Either way would you be wringing your hands over sending them a text?

No, because the first one and I are friends, so why would I agonize over it, knowing I wouldn't ruin anything. And the second one, if it scared him off, so be it.

Which brings us back around the point of this thread. OP is trying to parse the words of a text to a supposed FWB. That is the ultimate waste of time.

Right, because he is a friend who is having a birthday. Why try to turn it into you are Marilyn Monroe singing to Pres Kennedy?!

[Anonymous]

Is it just me.....??!.....

But I usually do not wish my FWBs a Happy Birthday.

Or a Merry Christmas for that matter.

But yes your text is everything any man would love to receive.

🔥

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it just me.....??!.....

But I usually do not wish my FWBs a Happy Birthday.

Or a Merry Christmas for that matter.

But yes your text is everything any man would love to receive.

🔥

My FWB wished me Merry XMas, Happy New Year, Happy Easter.... are you not friends? Sounds more like a FB situation on your end

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is it just me.....??!.....

But I usually do not wish my FWBs a Happy Birthday.

Or a Merry Christmas for that matter.

But yes your text is everything any man would love to receive.

🔥

My FWB wished me Merry XMas, Happy New Year, Happy Easter.... are you not friends? Sounds more like a FB situation on your end

Oh, and he traveled 600 mi to throw me a birthday party, too.