Has anyone never gotten a babysitter for their kids

[Anonymous]

I've never used a babysitter, and have no plans to. We only use family members to watch our children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't thinks fair to ask your parents to change their plans but we have late elementary school kids and never used a babysitter.

You’re like us!

I have a 2 and 4 year old and we’ve never used babysitter. My mom watched the kids when we went to a wedding a year ago. That’s about it.

[Anonymous]

Kinda crazy. We’ve had sitters since our kids were each 3 months old. We put the kids to bed when they’re under 2.5 and we leave at 7:30. That way we didn’t miss any time with our kids and no separation anxiety. My 1.5 year old has never met our weekly sitter. My 3 year old loves the sitter and really looks up to her. We have one every single Friday and sometimes I get them during the week when dh travels too so I can meet friends in town, book club or dinners.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your sister is [/b]too cheap [b]to pay a real babysitter.

And yet she’s going to pay for her moms flight change which will cost a lot more than $40 - $80 for a few hours of babysitting.

I think the sister had issues, but cheap is not of them.

[Anonymous]

My daughter is nine and has never had a babysitter of any kind (family or otherwise). My ex had an extremely traumatic childhood at the hands of multiple caregivers (some family). As a result, she had no relationship with her family when we met and was vehemently against babysitters of any kind. I grew up with my grandparents who passed right when she was born, so I didn't have anyone on my side to watch her. We moved to a new city right before we found out she was pregnant, so we didn't have any close friends. The ones we made weren't "close enough" to make my ex feel comfortable having babysit. We're divorced now, so we pretty much just work around each other's schedule.

[Anonymous]

I know someone who has literally never left her children with anyone ever including her husband from birth to kindergarten. Then in public school she eats lunch with them every day.

And she was totally normal pre-kids, I swear!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Kinda crazy. We’ve had sitters since our kids were each 3 months old. We put the kids to bed when they’re under 2.5 and we leave at 7:30. That way we didn’t miss any time with our kids and no separation anxiety. My 1.5 year old has never met our weekly sitter. My 3 year old loves the sitter and really looks up to her. We have one every single Friday and sometimes I get them during the week when dh travels too so I can meet friends in town, book club or dinners.

Have you thought about what would happen if your 1.5 year old woke up sick when you were gone and the sitter he/she had never met was there instead? Yikes. You really should introduce them.

[Anonymous]

I'm shocked so many people have NEVER used a non family babysitter or any type of babysitter for that matter. Don't you need a hair cut regularly, have to see the dentist, the dr, ever meet friends for lunch or book club, go out at night with your spouse on occasion??

We don't live near any family and my husband works tons of hours and is often working late into the evening and on weekends. I have several babysitters; mostly neighborhood girls in high school but some college students too for daytime appointments I occasionally have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm shocked so many people have NEVER used a non family babysitter or any type of babysitter for that matter. Don't you need a hair cut regularly, have to see the dentist, the dr, ever meet friends for lunch or book club, go out at night with your spouse on occasion??

We don't live near any family and my husband works tons of hours and is often working late into the evening and on weekends. I have several babysitters; mostly neighborhood girls in high school but some college students too for daytime appointments I occasionally have.

+1. I wonder if these same children have ever been in daycare, preschool, or have had a nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm shocked so many people have NEVER used a non family babysitter or any type of babysitter for that matter. Don't you need a hair cut regularly, have to see the dentist, the dr, ever meet friends for lunch or book club, go out at night with your spouse on occasion??

We don't live near any family and my husband works tons of hours and is often working late into the evening and on weekends. I have several babysitters; mostly neighborhood girls in high school but some college students too for daytime appointments I occasionally have.

But why the shock when you just said you don’t live near family? We intentionally moved to be close to my family when our dd was 18 months because having readily available (free and trustworthy) help is AMAZING. We’ve used a non-family sitter exactly once (dd of very close, long-time family friends) for an out-of-state wedding but otherwise have an abundance of family nearby so I don’t see us ever needing a HS or college kid to help out. Beyond childcare, having people who we can borrow a ladder from, ask to stop by to help move furniture, bring our packages in etc. has been invaluable and so worth the move. (Even though we miss city life.) I know some people are lucky enough to have friends who are like family but I always felt guilt asking even the closest friends for favors unless I was desperate. Living near family has made life so much better—grandma is as excited to take the kids so we can do a date night as we are to give them to her.

[Anonymous]

We have a nanny for the weekdays, but no desire for a weekend babysitter. Our weekends are centered around the kids and we are not fancy enough to be invited to adults-only parties - all of our invites are for the whole family. Grandparents visit about once a month so we plan date nights around that.

OP, your sister appears to be selfish and ridiculous, but I think the fact that she is willing to pay to switch your mom’s flight indicates how important this party is to her and how much she hates the idea of using a babysitter. Unless the plans you made are important as well, I would let it go for the sake of family peace.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm shocked so many people have NEVER used a non family babysitter or any type of babysitter for that matter. Don't you need a hair cut regularly, have to see the dentist, the dr, ever meet friends for lunch or book club, go out at night with your spouse on occasion??

We don't live near any family and my husband works tons of hours and is often working late into the evening and on weekends. I have several babysitters; mostly neighborhood girls in high school but some college students too for daytime appointments I occasionally have.

What's so shocking. I took mine with me or my husband flexed his schedule for things like doctors appointments (or he went with me). Hair cuts at night. If I meet up with friends, we brought the kids. At night, with friends, husband watches them. Early on we didn't worry about date nights. We had several years alone before kids. Now they are in school and husband can work at home so we do a date lunch. Neighbors will help out in an emergency but that's only been a few times. We really don't have a need.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm shocked so many people have NEVER used a non family babysitter or any type of babysitter for that matter. Don't you need a hair cut regularly, have to see the dentist, the dr, ever meet friends for lunch or book club, go out at night with your spouse on occasion??

We don't live near any family and my husband works tons of hours and is often working late into the evening and on weekends. I have several babysitters; mostly neighborhood girls in high school but some college students too for daytime appointments I occasionally have.

But why the shock when you just said you don’t live near family? We intentionally moved to be close to my family when our dd was 18 months because having readily available (free and trustworthy) help is AMAZING. We’ve used a non-family sitter exactly once (dd of very close, long-time family friends) for an out-of-state wedding but otherwise have an abundance of family nearby so I don’t see us ever needing a HS or college kid to help out. Beyond childcare, having people who we can borrow a ladder from, ask to stop by to help move furniture, bring our packages in etc. has been invaluable and so worth the move. (Even though we miss city life.) I know some people are lucky enough to have friends who are like family but I always felt guilt asking even the closest friends for favors unless I was desperate. Living near family has made life so much better—grandma is as excited to take the kids so we can do a date night as we are to give them to her.

My mom lives near me but she's no help. She will only see mine a few hours a month at her choosing at best. You are lucky to have family help. Even if you live close by, sometimes family is not a priority to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a nanny for the weekdays, but no desire for a weekend babysitter. Our weekends are centered around the kids and we are not fancy enough to be invited to adults-only parties - all of our invites are for the whole family. Grandparents visit about once a month so we plan date nights around that.

OP, your sister appears to be selfish and ridiculous, but I think the fact that she is willing to pay to switch your mom’s flight indicates how important this party is to her and how much she hates the idea of using a babysitter. Unless the plans you made are important as well, I would let it go for the sake of family peace.

+100 (last paragraph)

OP- to add, you sound jealous and resentful that your sister has free childcare, so easily accessible to boot, and this saga is the icing on the cake. There's probably a sliver of sadness inside of you, too, knowing your mom is much closer with your sister/grandkids since she's sees them a lot more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have a nanny for the weekdays, but no desire for a weekend babysitter. Our weekends are centered around the kids and we are not fancy enough to be invited to adults-only parties - all of our invites are for the whole family. Grandparents visit about once a month so we plan date nights around that.

OP, your sister appears to be selfish and ridiculous, but I think the fact that she is willing to pay to switch your mom’s flight indicates how important this party is to her and how much she hates the idea of using a babysitter. Unless the plans you made are important as well, I would let it go for the sake of family peace.

+100 (last paragraph)

OP- to add, you sound jealous and resentful that your sister has free childcare, so easily accessible to boot, and this saga is the icing on the cake. There's probably a sliver of sadness inside of you, too, knowing your mom is much closer with your sister/grandkids since she's sees them a lot more.