How do you survive the evenings with 2+ kids?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many parents with 2+ young kids have help (either family members or they hire someone to help with afternoon/evening routines). It makes life so much easier to have someone else helping with kids!

I really don't think this is the norm.

Most parents trudge through it alone, doing the best they can. Some nights are very tough. OP just needs to keep tweaking the routine until she finds what works for her.

Seriously...in what world do you live?

I guess that I think it’s the norm too. Most people have two parents at home in the evenings, some extended family nearby, OR they hire some help. People going solo with 2+ kids every evening happens, but it isn’t the norm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many parents with 2+ young kids have help (either family members or they hire someone to help with afternoon/evening routines). It makes life so much easier to have someone else helping with kids!

I really don't think this is the norm.

Most parents trudge through it alone, doing the best they can. Some nights are very tough. OP just needs to keep tweaking the routine until she finds what works for her.

Seriously...in what world do you live?

I guess that I think it’s the norm too. Most people have two parents at home in the evenings, some extended family nearby, OR they hire some help. People going solo with 2+ kids every evening happens, but it isn’t the norm.

NP, and I think it's the norm for many families, particularly those in which one parent (usually the wife) stays home and the other parent (usually the husband) works.

We have three, all two years apart, and the norm is that both of us are home at a reasonable hour and we handle dinner/clean-up/bedtime together, albeit not always in that order and not always divided evenly. We both pitch in and make it work.

[Anonymous]

We had staggered work schedules when our kids were very young, so I'd get home with them around 4:30, relax and play for a bit, then take quick baths and into jammies. Dinner was no later than 5:30 pm, and was almost always some sort of leftover protein or scrambled eggs, a veggie, a fruit, and a serving of dairy like cheese or yogurt. Super easy, almost no prep. DH would get home by 6, help with cleanup and bedtime, kids asleep by 7, and then we'd cook dinner together and eat by 7:30. As our kids got older and bedtime got later, kids could play independently while I made dinner for all of us. Then once DH was home we'd tag team bath, bedtime, cleanup, and next-day prep. Usually done and ready to flop on the couch no later than 8:30.

[Anonymous]

My husband is home by 6 pm every night. If I didn't have that, I don't know what I'd do.
He gets home at 6, makes a quick dinner or dishes out something I've put in the instant pot. We all sit down (including toddler) for dinner at 6:30. Usually, the baby's (4 months) last nap is during dinner time, so I'm usually bouncing on a ball with the baby in a carrier sleeping while I eat dinner. After dinner, husband does bath and most of bedtime for toddler while I'm with baby. We switch at the very end of toddler's bedtime routine (about 8:10 pm) so I can read her a story and put her in her crib.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I disagree with 2244.
We dont do screen time that close to bedtime and theres no need why you can't have regular fully cooked meals for dinner.

I solo parent an baby, 2, and 4 yr old. We play outside starting around 445/5. Around 620ish we come in, the girls play barbie, puzzles, color, help with dinner, whatever.
For dinner, 95% of prep is done already. I do it during nap/quiet time/night before, etc So much easier using a crock pot, or cedar plank salmon on the grill, or a chicken bake....all examples to streamline dinner.
Sometimes we'll play again outside after dinner or just stay inside and play. Baby gets fussy about this time so I ditch cleaning up the kitchen (it usually isn't too messy anyway) and leave it for after everyone is in bed so I can focus on bedtime transition. Sometimes all 3 are in the bath tub at the same time, sometimes it is a quick in/out bath or shower. I'll tell a story, read, talk before lights out.

it depends... full cooked meals often are full of preservatives, salt, fat and processed food.

If you eat less processed foods it's better fro children. Besides, they 4 month old is not eating a full cooked meal. The 2 year old does not need a full cooked meal... hello obesity.

What in the what? The PP was saying she makes meals that involve things like crockpots, salmon, and chicken. She was responding to a person who suggested feeding kids cheese and crackers for dinner. So, your crazy self swooped in and had to put the PP down by arguing that the cheese and crackers are the way to go bc things like dinners with salmon and chicken make kids fat bc they are full of preservatives and processed???

Are you also the person who sharpied Trump’s hurricane map?

Cheese, crackers and fruit are not less healthy than farm raised salmon (gross) and chicken with hormones (ack). She probably serves it with white rice ... not better.

Just get over yourself... you were socialized to believe that is healthier but fruit, cheese and some crackers is just as health if not better.

Me President please go back to fretting about the effects of Hurricane Dorian on Alabama. And take some English lessons while you’re at it.

Listen Kellyanne... there is not way to spin this... cheese and fruit is better for you than the fat/carb laden crap you are trying to sell.

Ah so now you’re dropping the fat and carb laden crackers? Ok good job.

Seriously, why would you just assume a home cooked meal is full of preservatives/sodium/fat etc. It’s ok that you don’t know how to cook but some of us do.

[Anonymous]

Some weird, lame troll on this thread trying to get everyone's feathers ruffled on a tired Thursday.

[Anonymous]

My kids are a bit older now, but I often did bedtime alone with the two when they were younger.

The first year with two kids is HARD. I agree to have dinner prepped as much as possible so you're just tossing a few things in a pan or heating something up.

After dinner, both kids in the tub at the same time. Little one in an infant seat in the tub for as long as she needs it. I used to put pajamas and the changing pad on the floor of the bathroom so I wasn't chasing a wet naked toddler around the house.

After bath, we'd go into the baby's room and read to her. The toddler listened and then would go into her room where she looked at books or played on her own while I nursed baby and put her down. Then, I'd go into the toddler's room, read her another book or two and turn out her lights.

This all worked because the both kids were relatively easy to put down and I had to remind the toddler frequently that she was cutting into her own book time if she delayed the baby's bedtime.

[Anonymous]

Are you a single parent OP? If you know you don't have anyone you need to line up help if you can't manage yourself. You are not going to magically going to grow an extra pair of hands. You need to be more disciplined with your routine and yes many single parents do it and do it well and you can too!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many parents with 2+ young kids have help (either family members or they hire someone to help with afternoon/evening routines). It makes life so much easier to have someone else helping with kids!

I really don't think this is the norm.

Most parents trudge through it alone, doing the best they can. Some nights are very tough. OP just needs to keep tweaking the routine until she finds what works for her.

Seriously...in what world do you live?

I guess that I think it’s the norm too. Most people have two parents at home in the evenings, some extended family nearby, OR they hire some help. People going solo with 2+ kids every evening happens, but it isn’t the norm.

NP, and I think it's the norm for many families, particularly those in which one parent (usually the wife) stays home and the other parent (usually the husband) works.

We have three, all two years apart, and the norm is that both of us are home at a reasonable hour and we handle dinner/clean-up/bedtime together, albeit not always in that order and not always divided evenly. We both pitch in and make it work.

I'm 9:46 and I guess I can't speak to it being the norm, but I WOH and my DH works long hours and is rarely home before 7:30. He's often not home before bedtime at all. I have always handled everything upon arriving home, and worked hard to get us into a good routine. It definitely entails leaving the older kid(s) on their own for brief periods, trudging through some fussing, and leaving cleanup until later that night.

[Anonymous]

Wear your baby, if possible. Or get a vibrating bouncy seat or similar for the kitchen/living room.

Make the easiest meals possible. When you do have a chance to cook, like on the weekends, make a huge vat of a stew or something where you can freeze half, eat half.

Get some of those semi-prepared foods from the grocery store; like at Wegmans, there's an assembled fresh meatloaf. You remove the plastic, then pop it in the oven in the container it comes in. Microwaved frozen peas, throw two potatoes in the microwave to bake. That, right now, is a fancy dinner!

Go easy on yourself! Nothing wrong with cutting a few corners to get you through.

[Anonymous]

Gah I’m worried about this - I have a 2 month old and a new 2 year old. I have no idea what baby’s bedtime is yet. 6? 10? 12? Also a pretty high needs baby when it comes to going to sleep (reflux issues). Toddler is not the most cooperative. Normally divide and conquer but Husband travels one week per month. My parents were here when he traveled for first time which was marginally helpful as my 2 yo refused to let them do much and took a very reluctant bath with them while I had baby, and they aren’t great w baby. At one point I was handed sleepy baby while doing toddler bedtime which perked toddler right up and he wouldn’t stop talking which led to awake baby and hyped toddler...everyone went to bed late.

I’m terrified of when I go back to work, so probably going to need to line up help but also hopefully have an early bedtime for baby by then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many parents with 2+ young kids have help (either family members or they hire someone to help with afternoon/evening routines). It makes life so much easier to have someone else helping with kids!

I really don't think this is the norm.

Most parents trudge through it alone, doing the best they can. Some nights are very tough. OP just needs to keep tweaking the routine until she finds what works for her.

Seriously...in what world do you live?

I guess that I think it’s the norm too. Most people have two parents at home in the evenings, some extended family nearby, OR they hire some help. People going solo with 2+ kids every evening happens, but it isn’t the norm.

NP, and I think it's the norm for many families, particularly those in which one parent (usually the wife) stays home and the other parent (usually the husband) works.

We have three, all two years apart, and the norm is that both of us are home at a reasonable hour and we handle dinner/clean-up/bedtime together, albeit not always in that order and not always divided evenly. We both pitch in and make it work.

I'm 9:46 and I guess I can't speak to it being the norm, but I WOH and my DH works long hours and is rarely home before 7:30. He's often not home before bedtime at all. I have always handled everything upon arriving home, and worked hard to get us into a good routine. It definitely entails leaving the older kid(s) on their own for brief periods, trudging through some fussing, and leaving cleanup until later that night.

I'm the PP whose DH is often working on house projects (that we both agree on and that I definitely can't do) in the evenings. I SAH part-time, but our evenings look similar after dinner, though I do have the benefit of having the SAH days for dinner prep. I'd especially emphasize that clean-up happens after bedtime. So does packing big kid/adult lunches for the next day. I hate that part of things, because it prevents collapsing on the couch at 8:30, but I haven't found another workable way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Try and prepare meals in advance as much as possible. I have two kids, one 2 and the other 8 months and weekends are the hardest. Evenings we can fill with park, meals, bath, bedtime routine, sleep. I found that having the meals ready ahead of time makes a huge difference.

I think this is great in theory, but it's really, really difficult if both parents work. Even if one gets off early, like I do. I think the idea of having a "meal prep day" on the weekend is also great in theory, but it's hard unless one of us takes the kids out without the other, or unless we can get a babysitter. Because the kids go to bed by 7:30, I prefer to spend our weekends together because we get so little of that during the week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gah I’m worried about this - I have a 2 month old and a new 2 year old. I have no idea what baby’s bedtime is yet. 6? 10? 12? Also a pretty high needs baby when it comes to going to sleep (reflux issues). Toddler is not the most cooperative. Normally divide and conquer but Husband travels one week per month. My parents were here when he traveled for first time which was marginally helpful as my 2 yo refused to let them do much and took a very reluctant bath with them while I had baby, and they aren’t great w baby. At one point I was handed sleepy baby while doing toddler bedtime which perked toddler right up and he wouldn’t stop talking which led to awake baby and hyped toddler...everyone went to bed late.

I’m terrified of when I go back to work, so probably going to need to line up help but also hopefully have an early bedtime for baby by then.

The early bedtime is a great advantage for a parent on his or her own. My kids were in bed by 7. 7-8 I was cleaning up, feeding the dog, folding laundry and then by 8 I had an evening to myself. My youngest was around 4.5 when he started going to bed later and I still miss that early bedtime!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try and prepare meals in advance as much as possible. I have two kids, one 2 and the other 8 months and weekends are the hardest. Evenings we can fill with park, meals, bath, bedtime routine, sleep. I found that having the meals ready ahead of time makes a huge difference.

I think this is great in theory, but it's really, really difficult if both parents work. Even if one gets off early, like I do. I think the idea of having a "meal prep day" on the weekend is also great in theory, but it's hard unless one of us takes the kids out without the other, or unless we can get a babysitter. Because the kids go to bed by 7:30, I prefer to spend our weekends together because we get so little of that during the week.

Agree with both PPs. I try to meal prep but it IS hard and if we are, say, out of town for a weekend then I find we are in a state of chaos/paying catch up all week. We did recently start hiring a twice-a-month house cleaner. Totally recognize that it is not doable for everyone and may not even be sustainable for us longterm but for this phase it has been really helpful because then when I do get a bit of spare time on the weekend (e.g., when the baby is napping and DH takes preschooler to park) I can actually focus on cooking. Never get a week's worth prepped by any means but every little bit helps for a smoother week.