Child still sleeping in parents bed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As this lady's ex, I don't think I would be OK with my child sleeping in a bed with you.

Same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As this lady's ex, I don't think I would be OK with my child sleeping in a bed with you.

Multiple conversations have happened regarding this topic and there is a plan to get a big kid bed as a birthday gift real soon and transition them, but I totally agree with you. I'm just in the awkward place of not being the kids parent and not making the rules.

The only thing you can control is you, yet you don’t control you. Why aren’t you sleeping elsewhere now these nights?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am in a long-term committed relationship with someone who has her kid a little more than half of the week. The kid is almost 4 and still sleeps in the bed with us on the days they are at the house. Needless to say the sleep on those nights is not the best. What is everyone thoughts on this. Prior to me, it was easier for her to have the kid sleeping with her and just never changed.

Find someone without kids.

[Anonymous]

Does the mom encourage you to sleep with them? If so, she is not someone I would choose to be in a relationship with.

[Anonymous]

You need to go home and sleep in your own bed and not with her child. You are the inappropriate part there, and she is utterly wrong to allow you there at all.

[Anonymous]

OP there is a pretty rare consensus on DCUM here, I hope you are going to listen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP there is a pretty rare consensus on DCUM here, I hope you are going to listen.

OP here, I actually decided to talk about it and then it basically ended with us taking a break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP there is a pretty rare consensus on DCUM here, I hope you are going to listen.

OP here, I actually decided to talk about it and then it basically ended with us taking a break.

I think that was wise. If she cared about you at all, she would not have invited you into the bed with the child in there too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As this lady's ex, I don't think I would be OK with my child sleeping in a bed with you.

Same.

+2. The problem here isn't the child in the parent's bed but OP (boyfriend or girlfriend) of the parent staying over and sleeping in the same bed.

[Anonymous]

"Don't sleep there when she has her child."

This.

-divorced mom with a kid who co-slept until an older age

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As this lady's ex, I don't think I would be OK with my child sleeping in a bed with you.

Same.

I don't think it's a good idea either, but the ex doesn't get a say unless no overnights is written into a custody agreement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Call Jayne - she helped me transition my 3 year old out of my bed thesnoozefest.com

Hi Jayne. Funny how "someone" manages to recommend you in every sleep thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Call Jayne - she helped me transition my 3 year old out of my bed thesnoozefest.com

Hi Jayne. Funny how "someone" manages to recommend you in every sleep thread.

+1

I noticed that too ?

[Anonymous]

Hi OP.

I see that you guys are taking a break.

Sleep issues are tough. The child needs to come first. If your girlfriend wants at some point to have a serious relationship with someone and have you sleeping over, the child can never be in the bed. How to handle this if the child is used to co sleeping:

Put a large mattress in the child's room (on the floor if necessary).

Mom can cosleep with the child in the child's room.

Mom can sleep with you in the master bedroom once the child is asleep.

If child wakes mom up and wants to come into the bed with her, mom gets up and goes to the child's bed to cosleep.

This gets the child used to the idea that her bed is in her bedroom, and mom sometimes comes and sleeps there. Not that mom's bed belongs to the child. Child should never be sleeping in mom's bed if another adult not the dad is in the bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP there is a pretty rare consensus on DCUM here, I hope you are going to listen.

OP here, I actually decided to talk about it and then it basically ended with us taking a break.

I think that was wise. If she cared about you at all, she would not have invited you into the bed with the child in there too.

If she cared about the CHILD at all, OP wouldn’t be in the bed.