You absolutely get to make rules about where you sleep. You may be right that you can't choose where to sleep, but no one is forcing you to sleep in the bed where this child is sleeping. And kicking a child out of the bed so you can have sex is not a birthday gift. If the family thinks that it's time for the child to move, then get them a bed, but making it a birthday gift, especially when it's not being done for the child's need but your need, is really unfair to the kid. |
Holy crap what is this mom thinking |
+1000 Get out of the bed OP. This is trouble. |
+i'm divorced and my kid sleeps in the bed with me. My bf (of several years) rarely stays over when my daughter is with me, he will sometimes have dinner with us and then head home, but if he does stay he sleeps on the couch. I would feel uncomfortable, my bf would feel uncomfortable, and my ex would DEFINITELY feel uncomfortable if I had my daughter sleeping in the bed with an unrelated adult man. |
See correction |
Call Jayne - she helped me transition my 3 year old out of my bed thesnoozefest.com |
OP isn't trying to transition a 3 year old out of OP's bed. He's trying to transition a 3 year old out of the 3 year old's bed so he can sex with the 3 year old's mom. Is that Jayne's speciality? He might want to check if she's a mandated reporter before he calls her. |
this |
This! It is inappropriate and you are opening yourself up to world’s of trouble and suspicion. That mother is nuts for allowing you in the bed with her daughter. |
you are a disgusting cruel person .what is this mother thinking? and also - what long term relationship? the child is 3, you idiot. |
There is nothing wrong with a 4 yo sleeping with his or her parent. But you should not be in the bed. Sleep on the couch or stay at your own place on those nights. |
+1. F'ed up, OP. Get out of the bed. You have no business sleeping with that child even if you're a damn saint. |
OP may be a saint but this is terrible for the kid. He/she is not learning the boundaries that help keep kids safe. This is incredibly damaging and leaves this child ripe for grooming from others with bad intentions.
This woman is not a person to be in a relationship with, OP. She makes really, REALLY bad decisions by putting her child at risk. |
I am wondering if OP is a woman. This is still not okay, OP. It is really REALLY not ok. |
Agree. Also, a long term relationship is not the same as if you are getting married to the mother. You’re still just a boyfriend or girlfriend, sorry. And agree that it’s gross to get the kid a bed as a birthday gift. Here kid, here’s a bed you don’t want that I’m going to force you in so I can shack up with your mom and take the cuddles and nighttime security you’re used to for myself. I don’t care if you’re 4, or that your parents are split up, or that maybe you like the security of sleeping in mom’s bed, my needs are clearly more important as the boyfriend/girlfriend. Good luck with that, I’m sure the 4 year old is totally going to love you and cooperate fully. |