Really upset over weight gain

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go seek some professional help with your self-esteem and body issues before your baby is born. You likely have control issues too - not a good mix with children.

Go away. No pregnant woman likes to gain weight. Doesn't mean she has control issues.

Though you certainly have an issue with being a nasty b*tch...which is not a good mix with children.

Says who? I was not happy with my pre-pregnancy weight but I don't at all mind gaining a healthy amount of weight during my pregnancy. It means everything is happening as it should and baby is growing, etc. The OP has gained a normal amount of weight and is freaking out. I agree she should address her body/self-esteem issues. Her attitude seems unhealthy given the amount she has put on.

I agree with this. OP seems overly concerned about this, and won't say anything to her husband because he'll think she's overreacting - it does seem like she has some body or self esteem issues. I see a lot of posts that make me think the same thing - the ones who flip out over really normal weight gain, count calories obsessively, or exercise crazy amounts really late into pregnancy - much of it seems like body image issues that aren't terribly healthy. It's hard being pregnant and seeing your body change, but when you're REALLY UPSET and can't discuss it with your spouse, it seems unhealthy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go seek some professional help with your self-esteem and body issues before your baby is born. You likely have control issues too - not a good mix with children.

Go away. No pregnant woman likes to gain weight. Doesn't mean she has control issues.

Though you certainly have an issue with being a nasty b*tch...which is not a good mix with children.

Says who? I was not happy with my pre-pregnancy weight but I don't at all mind gaining a healthy amount of weight during my pregnancy. It means everything is happening as it should and baby is growing, etc. The OP has gained a normal amount of weight and is freaking out. I agree she should address her body/self-esteem issues. Her attitude seems unhealthy given the amount she has put on.

I agree with this. OP seems overly concerned about this, and won't say anything to her husband because he'll think she's overreacting - it does seem like she has some body or self esteem issues. I see a lot of posts that make me think the same thing - the ones who flip out over really normal weight gain, count calories obsessively, or exercise crazy amounts really late into pregnancy - much of it seems like body image issues that aren't terribly healthy. It's hard being pregnant and seeing your body change, but when you're REALLY UPSET and can't discuss it with your spouse, it seems unhealthy.

OP here again, please shut up. I know I was overreacting. I don't have body issues.

My doctor and MIL who is a registered dietitian were the ones who told me to be concerned about my weight.

I know that you're going to gain weight when pregnant, its just when you've been told to keep your weight gain within a certain limit in order to make sure the baby is healthy, its easy to get upset about gaining a little bit of weight over a short period of time. Especially if you're pregnant, sleeping on the floor for the past couple of days due to staying with relatives, and just sat through six hours of traffic on the way home. And for the record, I also don't share with my husband when I get really upset over messing up dinner or missing my train home, because I know its stupid and just hormones.

So please shut up and stop saying that a small meltdown (which I only shared with an anonymous forum because I knew it was stupid) is indicative of me being an unfit mother or having anorexic tendencies.

[Anonymous]

Whoa, OP - take a look at your reaction there. That doesn't seem terribly...rational. Who called you an unfit mother? Seriously, your post just made me worry about you a whole lot more. I wish you the best.

[Anonymous]

My doctor and MIL who is a registered dietitian were the ones who told me to be concerned about my weight.

They told you to watch your weight, in the sense that all pregnant women should try to eat well and exercise moderately, or to be concerned about it? Are they really concerned about the weight you've gained thus far because, if so, they are not good at their jobs.

[Anonymous]

Okay ladies, this is the Expectant Mothers forum. We're all hormonal and a little sensitive so let's try to be kind to eachother. Please!

[Anonymous]

i have to say, reading this whole thread made me reach for a reese's peanut butter cup! but seriously, we live in an *)(*ed up culture when it comes to expectations about women's bodies: that we should all be hardbodies, maintain a strict regimen even during pregnancy, and lose it all within 3 months. While on the one hand these expectations (which have been internalized to greater or lesser degrees by many of us) generate unhealthy or obsessive behavior, the reality of women's health is just as unhealthy, with many women fallnig into the overweight or obese categories. I wish that pregnancy were one of the few times that women could leave behind unhealthy behavior--whether controlling to0 much for fearing of gaining one pound over the recommended limit (or even striving to stay at the bottom of that limit) or going crazy and eating a lot of crap. But I know even from my own experience that I can't escape that obsession totally. I don't think the OP is "overreacting" any more than many many women do, on a daily basis, to the discrepancy between expectations and reality, to mixed messages about what is "healthy," to issues of control and perfection, to what we are "supposed" to look like versus the reality of the wide diversity of women's bodies.

and as a related aside i went to my ob/gyn today, who congratulated me for gaining less than a lb over thanksgiving ==but the truth is that I've been feeling ill and have been eating barely enough to get by--much less than I ate pre-pregnancy even, and I know it's nowhere near the recommended calcium and protein requirements for my baby. But even my OB was (if unintentionally) reinforcing the idea that weight gain during pregnancy is 'bad.' fwiw, I am well within recommendations for weight gain and started at a very healthy bmi.

[Anonymous]

I gained 54 lbs during my pregnancy. In the third trimester I was literally gaining 3 lbs a week - while exercising daily and eating not too ridiculously. (I was very lean before - low body fat.) The doctors initially nagged me, but I think eventually they realized it was somewhat beyond my control. I suspected a lot of it was water weight, so I forced myself to joke about it and find it funny. (I had my friends place bets on my final weight - 196.) I lost 34 lbs within 3 days of the birth - because most of it was in fact water weight. The rest was milkshakes, I think. It took a few months to lose the rest, but it did happen and I'm back to approximately my former weight.

Try not to stress too much. Go back to eating healthy and get your exercise and you will be fine.

[Anonymous]

OP, I lost weight during the first trimester (3 pounds). Then, from weeks 16-20, while running 5 miles every single freakin' day and eating nothing but fruit and egg-white omeletes (because that's what I CRAVED), I gained 20 pounds!! I was shocked and had a meltdown in the office. My doc checked me for diabetes and a host of other ailments. Of course, nothing was wrong, and I went on to gain a total of 45 pounds while continuing my running and healthy eating. As I watched the scale go up and up, I had to let the panic go. Clearly, my body was taking over. It was hard, but I had to just trust that it had an inherent wisdom. FWIW, I also lost every single pound in six weeks. As it turns out, I was a high output pumper (52 oz/day) and my baby a voracious eater, so I guess I needed all that fat to feed my baby. I didn't diet one day nor did I really even think about food that much. It just melted off. So my advice is: trust your body. I know it gets tough and you're allowed to be upset. Take deep breaths, go for long walks and eat as well as you can. Truly, that's all you can do. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Hi OP. Currently 15 wks. Gained 6 lbs! the first month and now 2.5 lbs the 2nd. I was stressed about the 1st month weight gain but I was starving then and ate a lot. Eat when you are hungry and try to eat healthy. FWIW I gained 40 with my first and lost it all in just under 5 months. You just have to let it go for now, I know it is hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I was like you. I am 5'5" and weighed 127 at my first OB appt. I gained 70 pounds (yes, that's a seven) during my pregnancy. DC is now 9 months, and I've lost 80 pounds. A lot of it was water weight - I actually gained 7 pounds in one week. I lost 20 pounds in the two days after the birth and the rest in the next few months. Don't think about the weight gain. Think about the healthy baby.

Can I ask how much your baby weighed? My only concern with gaining too much weight (and I'm not the OP) is a too big baby!

Baby was 7.5 pounds so 62.5 pounds wasn't baby! DC came a week early.

[Anonymous]

I know that it sucks to gain the weight but as long as you are eating generally healthy I would not worry about it for now. I gained 45 pounds and lost it all in 3 months.