Is being called or thought of as a bad mother...

[Anonymous]

Nope.

I wouldn't like it, of course, and how much it bothered me would correlate with who was saying it. (Husband/best friend/sister versus casual acquaintance/judgy mom/stranger.)

Overall I'm doing a pretty good job as a mom, and I don't think there's one particular way anyway - so I'm pretty secure in my skin in this regard.

I think really poorly of anyone else who makes those kinds of judgments though.

[Anonymous]

My child has special needs and I have been thought of and called a bad mother countless times for losing patience, the decisions I have made re schools and therapies, the parenting methods I use. I am doing the best I can, he has made progress, and this entire experience has been the most humbling of my life and the best lesson that has come is you have no control over other peoples' thoughts or actions, only over your own. I also think needing everyone to think you're omfgbestmomever and have perfect children is toxic and bad for both mothers and children. Also, nobody else thinks or cares this much about you, so I would let that go.