S/O Why does society judge people's weight? When did it start judging? Please be polite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work in a hospital with the sickest patients, the ones who have 4 or 5 chronic diseases and are now in their final year of life.

Every. single. one. of these patients brought their chronic disease and shit quality of life on themselves due to lifestyle factors that were entirely within their control: smoking, excess drinking, and bad diet/obesity. So, so much obesity. This is in a large DMV hospital btw.

Their lifetime of choices is now affecting us all, because we are directly paying for their very, very expensive health care via Medicaid & Medicare.

Someone is going to post now about how this ^^^ is entirely the result of poverty vs. privilege, and lack of access to preventative health care, and health disparities etc etc. Not the case in my big hospital: the majority of these fat, sick people were middle income, one-time professionals and/or well-paid tradesmen & blue collar workers with gold-plated health insurance. Lots of WMATA drivers and mechanics, public school teachers, city/state/federal office workers, etc.

I do feel sorry for them, yes, but I also inwardly judge them for bringing this hell onto themselves. And when their fat family members shuffle in to see them clutching their bags of fried Chik-fil-A and Popeyes and stink up their hospital rooms, I judge them silently too.

The very definition of a compassionate caregiver!

Ugh. You are ignorant. You are awful. You should be ashamed of yourself.

Someone in healthcare dealing with these issues every day is not "ignorant". She's stating her observations and experience. We should learn from it instead of getting defensive.

[Anonymous]

I think we're on the verge of fat shaming becoming just as taboo as other judgments based on appearance.

Sure, some percentage of people have knowingly and willingly made bad lifestyle choices, but how can we be sure just by looking at them?

What if people are overeating because of undiagnosed depression? Maybe they've suffered trauma and self-soothe with food? What if they have a genetic predisposition exacerbated by poor parenting?

What if they've become addicted to fat/salt/sugar? Is addiction to food really so different from addiction to alcohol or drugs? Those are considered illnesses that need to be treated, not shamed.

How is judging someone by their size and shape any different from judging them by their color? Before you say people can't help what color they are, here's the thing—since we can't know why someone is overweight, why is it ok to judge them for their appearance?

An argument used against homosexuality being a choice was "why would anyone choose to be something that would make their life much more difficult?" So, why would anyone choose to be fat?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work in a hospital with the sickest patients, the ones who have 4 or 5 chronic diseases and are now in their final year of life.

Every. single. one. of these patients brought their chronic disease and shit quality of life on themselves due to lifestyle factors that were entirely within their control: smoking, excess drinking, and bad diet/obesity. So, so much obesity. This is in a large DMV hospital btw.

Their lifetime of choices is now affecting us all, because we are directly paying for their very, very expensive health care via Medicaid & Medicare.

Someone is going to post now about how this ^^^ is entirely the result of poverty vs. privilege, and lack of access to preventative health care, and health disparities etc etc. Not the case in my big hospital: the majority of these fat, sick people were middle income, one-time professionals and/or well-paid tradesmen & blue collar workers with gold-plated health insurance. Lots of WMATA drivers and mechanics, public school teachers, city/state/federal office workers, etc.

I do feel sorry for them, yes, but I also inwardly judge them for bringing this hell onto themselves. And when their fat family members shuffle in to see them clutching their bags of fried Chik-fil-A and Popeyes and stink up their hospital rooms, I judge them silently too.

The very definition of a compassionate caregiver!

Ugh. You are ignorant. You are awful. You should be ashamed of yourself.

Someone in healthcare dealing with these issues every day is not "ignorant". She's stating her observations and experience. We should learn from it instead of getting defensive.

No defensiveness here. 118 lbs.

Look at the “caregiver’s” language about people “shuffling” in and “gold-plated” insurance. She should be defensive, because she so casually and obviously reveals where she is coming from. Disgusting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work in a hospital with the sickest patients, the ones who have 4 or 5 chronic diseases and are now in their final year of life.

Every. single. one. of these patients brought their chronic disease and shit quality of life on themselves due to lifestyle factors that were entirely within their control: smoking, excess drinking, and bad diet/obesity. So, so much obesity. This is in a large DMV hospital btw.

Their lifetime of choices is now affecting us all, because we are directly paying for their very, very expensive health care via Medicaid & Medicare.

Someone is going to post now about how this ^^^ is entirely the result of poverty vs. privilege, and lack of access to preventative health care, and health disparities etc etc. Not the case in my big hospital: the majority of these fat, sick people were middle income, one-time professionals and/or well-paid tradesmen & blue collar workers with gold-plated health insurance. Lots of WMATA drivers and mechanics, public school teachers, city/state/federal office workers, etc.

I do feel sorry for them, yes, but I also inwardly judge them for bringing this hell onto themselves. And when their fat family members shuffle in to see them clutching their bags of fried Chik-fil-A and Popeyes and stink up their hospital rooms, I judge them silently too.

I don't doubt that you are right in your comments. Though I am coming from this from a different angle (but amazingly similar).
As someone who suffers from extreme anorexia, I am hospitalized quite often. Yes, it's technically brought on myself. I am getting treatment for it, but there are bumps in the road.

I am very aware of how the doctors and nurses are judging me the entire time. You don't hide it well. So ya know what, a little compassion goes a long way. Believe it or not, you may even become a happier person who does a better job in your chosen career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work in a hospital with the sickest patients, the ones who have 4 or 5 chronic diseases and are now in their final year of life.

Every. single. one. of these patients brought their chronic disease and shit quality of life on themselves due to lifestyle factors that were entirely within their control: smoking, excess drinking, and bad diet/obesity. So, so much obesity. This is in a large DMV hospital btw.

Their lifetime of choices is now affecting us all, because we are directly paying for their very, very expensive health care via Medicaid & Medicare.

Someone is going to post now about how this ^^^ is entirely the result of poverty vs. privilege, and lack of access to preventative health care, and health disparities etc etc. Not the case in my big hospital: the majority of these fat, sick people were middle income, one-time professionals and/or well-paid tradesmen & blue collar workers with gold-plated health insurance. Lots of WMATA drivers and mechanics, public school teachers, city/state/federal office workers, etc.

I do feel sorry for them, yes, but I also inwardly judge them for bringing this hell onto themselves. And when their fat family members shuffle in to see them clutching their bags of fried Chik-fil-A and Popeyes and stink up their hospital rooms, I judge them silently too.

I don't doubt that you are right in your comments. Though I am coming from this from a different angle (but amazingly similar).
As someone who suffers from extreme anorexia, I am hospitalized quite often. Yes, it's technically brought on myself. I am getting treatment for it, but there are bumps in the road.

I am very aware of how the doctors and nurses are judging me the entire time. You don't hide it well. So ya know what, a little compassion goes a long way. Believe it or not, you may even become a happier person who does a better job in your chosen career.

DP. I don't think you can say that anorexia is all that similar to overeating, even though it may seem that way since they both have to do with eating. Anorexia is a fairly severe mental illness. It's not normal for people to have such a distorted body image that they want to starve themselves. Overeating, on the other hand, is something that many/most of us would do, if we decided to stop caring about our health. I guess there are some people who genuinely don't ever feel like eating junk food, but for many of us, we do. I mean, you think I don't feel like eating a family sized container of my favorite ice-cream right now? I do. But I won't. I've never, on the other hand, had the desire to starve myself.

In other words, many of us would be obese if we decided to submit to our urges and just lounge around all day eating crap. But not many of us would be thin to the point of being dangerously underweight and unhealthy if we could eat whatever we wanted regardless of the consequences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work in a hospital with the sickest patients, the ones who have 4 or 5 chronic diseases and are now in their final year of life.

Every. single. one. of these patients brought their chronic disease and shit quality of life on themselves due to lifestyle factors that were entirely within their control: smoking, excess drinking, and bad diet/obesity. So, so much obesity. This is in a large DMV hospital btw.

Their lifetime of choices is now affecting us all, because we are directly paying for their very, very expensive health care via Medicaid & Medicare.

Someone is going to post now about how this ^^^ is entirely the result of poverty vs. privilege, and lack of access to preventative health care, and health disparities etc etc. Not the case in my big hospital: the majority of these fat, sick people were middle income, one-time professionals and/or well-paid tradesmen & blue collar workers with gold-plated health insurance. Lots of WMATA drivers and mechanics, public school teachers, city/state/federal office workers, etc.

I do feel sorry for them, yes, but I also inwardly judge them for bringing this hell onto themselves. And when their fat family members shuffle in to see them clutching their bags of fried Chik-fil-A and Popeyes and stink up their hospital rooms, I judge them silently too.

I don't doubt that you are right in your comments. Though I am coming from this from a different angle (but amazingly similar).
As someone who suffers from extreme anorexia, I am hospitalized quite often. Yes, it's technically brought on myself. I am getting treatment for it, but there are bumps in the road.

I am very aware of how the doctors and nurses are judging me the entire time. You don't hide it well. So ya know what, a little compassion goes a long way. Believe it or not, you may even become a happier person who does a better job in your chosen career.

DP. I don't think you can say that anorexia is all that similar to overeating, even though it may seem that way since they both have to do with eating. Anorexia is a fairly severe mental illness. It's not normal for people to have such a distorted body image that they want to starve themselves. Overeating, on the other hand, is something that many/most of us would do, if we decided to stop caring about our health. I guess there are some people who genuinely don't ever feel like eating junk food, but for many of us, we do. I mean, you think I don't feel like eating a family sized container of my favorite ice-cream right now? I do. But I won't. I've never, on the other hand, had the desire to starve myself.

In other words, many of us would be obese if we decided to submit to our urges and just lounge around all day eating crap. But not many of us would be thin to the point of being dangerously underweight and unhealthy if we could eat whatever we wanted regardless of the consequences.

Obesity can be the result of mental illness similar to anorexia. It can spring from depression, anxiety, or past sexual trauma. Have some compassion. Some people respond to stress by losing their appetite - others stress eat. Your personal experience (sample size of 1) is not the whole human experience .

I love dessert, but the idea of eating a whole family size container of anything sounds revolting. I just wouldn't want to do it. My stomach would hurt. People do feel full or uncomfortable at a certain point. I don't use my personal experience to say that's how it must be for everyone or even most people. What a limited world view.

[Anonymous]

Obesity can be the result of mental illness similar to anorexia. It can spring from depression, anxiety, or past sexual trauma. Have some compassion. Some people respond to stress by losing their appetite - others stress eat. Your personal experience (sample size of 1) is not the whole human experience .

I love dessert, but the idea of eating a whole family size container of anything sounds revolting. I just wouldn't want to do it. My stomach would hurt. People do feel full or uncomfortable at a certain point. I don't use my personal experience to say that's how it must be for everyone or even most people. What a limited world view.

This is well said. There are people in both camps so there is no way for strangers to know: do you overeat/are you obese due to lack of discipline, or do you have a trauma, depression, addiction or health issue (e.g., medication, thyroid), etc.? Why can't we just be compassionate since each person is a human being with feelings?

To PP's point, I would say I have a food addiction. Meaning, I can happily binge on a pizza, donuts, ice cream, and not once feel ill or sick. Rather, it's a feeling of euphoria, happiness, contentment to be that full. In that sense, we are very different. The only reason I am not overweight despite struggling with it my entire adult life is because I KNOW it would stunt my career, peers would look down on me, my family would give me a hard time, and my health would be impacted. All external factors for the most part. Obese individuals may not have the same sensitivities to those external factors to influence behavior and may have things in their life that are outside of their control.

When I've heard people talk negatively about those who are overweight, it all seems to come back to a judgment about their personal discipline or lack thereof. As if being overweight/obese is an indictment on who that person is, their work ethic, and so on. It's such a false narrative, but anecdotally it is what I hear.

[Anonymous]

It’s due to our cultural obsession with youth.

Young people tend to be thinner than middle aged and old people.

No one wants to age anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Someone is going to post now about how this ^^^ is entirely the result of poverty vs. privilege, and lack of access to preventative health care, and health disparities etc etc. Not the case in my big hospital: the majority of these fat, sick people were middle income, one-time professionals and/or well-paid tradesmen & blue collar workers with gold-plated health insurance. Lots of WMATA drivers and mechanics, public school teachers, city/state/federal office workers, etc.

They used to say that about poor people and cholera - it was due to bad lifestyles, they were too dirty, whatever. Then we fixed the sanitation, and we brought it to an end. We went from shaming to public health.

I have normal BMI. I bike commute regularly. I know that lots of people are afraid to. I know that studies have shown that more walkable bikeable communities lead to more exercise, and even to less obesity. Rather than shaming people, my focus is on making the place where I live more walkable and bikeable than it now is. That won't help people who are most resistant to changing their lifestyle, or people with thyroid problems, but I think it can help many.

[Anonymous]

I think that TV shows like The Biggest Loser and the gastric bypass surgery shows (My 600 Lb Life) have contributed to people thinking that this is a problem someone can fix very quickly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think we're on the verge of fat shaming becoming just as taboo as other judgments based on appearance.

Sure, some percentage of people have knowingly and willingly made bad lifestyle choices, but how can we be sure just by looking at them?

What if people are overeating because of undiagnosed depression? Maybe they've suffered trauma and self-soothe with food? What if they have a genetic predisposition exacerbated by poor parenting?

What if they've become addicted to fat/salt/sugar? Is addiction to food really so different from addiction to alcohol or drugs? Those are considered illnesses that need to be treated, not shamed.

How is judging someone by their size and shape any different from judging them by their color? Before you say people can't help what color they are, here's the thing—since we can't know why someone is overweight, why is it ok to judge them for their appearance?

An argument used against homosexuality being a choice was "why would anyone choose to be something that would make their life much more difficult?" So, why would anyone choose to be fat?

I use to watch the show my 600-lb life and pretty much every woman on that show had been molested and/or raped. I had to stop watching it because they were so damaged and wounded. I know my rape is what led me to put on weight, I wanted to be ignored and not seen by men. I had to work through that pain before I could even begin to sort out my weight itself.

[Anonymous]

I think a lot of overweight people have mental health issues. I have worked with a few obese women. They were very difficult to work with. They would also expect others to do things for them that they could not physically do.