Just right for DCUM: New Article on Physical Attraction

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not attracted to DH, and I see myself in a lot of that list. But how do you dump your best friend who hasn't done anything wrong?

+1

PP, do you tell your DH that you are not attracted to him?

Nooo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not attracted to DH, and I see myself in a lot of that list. But how do you dump your best friend who hasn't done anything wrong?

This. I found myself all over that list. DH is perfect -- except I'm not really attracted to him. He's good in bed, but there is no - fire. There never was for me. Our marriage would probably be classified as a good one (regular sex, outwardly respectful partners, parents on the same page about kids, both gainfully employed, brilliant children, blah blah blah), I've got nothing to complain about. I could simply be done with this marriage and be happy without it. I'd miss his handyman helping around the house, though. And the way he is a great father. But sexual attraction is at zero. I ignored this for a long long time. But ... it doesn't go away. You don't get MORE attracted to your spouse as they get older. They get fatter, breath louder, fart smellier, and taste even worse than when you married them two decades ago.

So what do you do? I'm not into sexless anything (I haven't hit menopause yet, I'm still horny), DH doesn't want to open the marriage, affairs are fun but ultimately don't work out, and at the end of the day I'm still married.

Have you said all of the above to your DH? You sound seriously screwed up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Monogamy is tough on everyone. Men just don't over-analyze it; they get horny and try to sleep with other women. They will also want to have sex with their wives, so there's that.

That’s not true. Plenty of men prefer over their fat wives etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women do not marry because of physical attraction. They marry for other reasons such as money or status.

Don't fool yourself, for women with a healthy sex drive physical attraction matters. No I wouldn't have married a hot broke guy, but I wouldn't have married an ugly rich one either.

Please women are not into sex because they like sex. It’s a means to an end. If you have to have sex with a man, it might as well be with someone who is rich. The only thing attractive about a man is his wallet. Do your sons a service and tell them this early and often.

Thank you for the male POV! Douche bag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated a girl I wasn’t attracted to. I did all those things and she ended up cheating on me. Especially the nitpicking . Everything she did annoyed me. I also really initiate sex, and one point completely stopped. This article is spot on

This worries me because me DH nitpicks constantly and I'm pretty sure everything I do annoys him.

How often do you have Sex?

Rarely, but that’s on me. I don’t want to have sex who was whining about where I put a cup 5 minutes earlier.

So you DO want sex, just not with your DH. Tell us about that new / interesting man at work who has captured your interest and you would jump right into bed with after 15 minutes of him chatting you up. Congrats on being exactly like every other married woman in america. It's like a nationwide "wife swap" system. As a married man, I know my wife has no interest in sex (with me) but at least I am surrounded by married women (like you) who are bored at home thereby making me the new / interesting man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not attracted to DH, and I see myself in a lot of that list. But how do you dump your best friend who hasn't done anything wrong?

This. I found myself all over that list. DH is perfect -- except I'm not really attracted to him. He's good in bed, but there is no - fire. There never was for me. Our marriage would probably be classified as a good one (regular sex, outwardly respectful partners, parents on the same page about kids, both gainfully employed, brilliant children, blah blah blah), I've got nothing to complain about. I could simply be done with this marriage and be happy without it. I'd miss his handyman helping around the house, though. And the way he is a great father. But sexual attraction is at zero. I ignored this for a long long time. But ... it doesn't go away. You don't get MORE attracted to your spouse as they get older. They get fatter, breath louder, fart smellier, and taste even worse than when you married them two decades ago.

So what do you do? I'm not into sexless anything (I haven't hit menopause yet, I'm still horny), DH doesn't want to open the marriage, affairs are fun but ultimately don't work out, and at the end of the day I'm still married.

Have you said all of the above to your DH? You sound seriously screwed up.

I'm starting to think I am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not attracted to DH, and I see myself in a lot of that list. But how do you dump your best friend who hasn't done anything wrong?

This. I found myself all over that list. DH is perfect -- except I'm not really attracted to him. He's good in bed, but there is no - fire. There never was for me. Our marriage would probably be classified as a good one (regular sex, outwardly respectful partners, parents on the same page about kids, both gainfully employed, brilliant children, blah blah blah), I've got nothing to complain about. I could simply be done with this marriage and be happy without it. I'd miss his handyman helping around the house, though. And the way he is a great father. But sexual attraction is at zero. I ignored this for a long long time. But ... it doesn't go away. You don't get MORE attracted to your spouse as they get older. They get fatter, breath louder, fart smellier, and taste even worse than when you married them two decades ago.

So what do you do? I'm not into sexless anything (I haven't hit menopause yet, I'm still horny), DH doesn't want to open the marriage, affairs are fun but ultimately don't work out, and at the end of the day I'm still married.

Have you said all of the above to your DH? You sound seriously screwed up.

I'm starting to think I am.

Not really, you are quite normal: married woman with zero sexual attraction to husband yet you remain married for the extra income and "have a man around" while lusting after your son's soccer coach. This is simply the marriage deal: just keep going with the regular sex, and the whole thing remains stable. You could always run off with that coach, it would work for a year or 2, until your attraction for him wanes and the cycle repeats.