Date this guy or red flag

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:a male perspective....

after my divorce at 40, I moved back home because the ex wife got the house.
I was also unemployed because I was laid off on the same day the divorce was finalized.
I wasn't totally overweight at the time of the divorce but I did gain about 20 lbs after the divorce.
My mom and sister both dislike my ex wife.
I lived at home for about 8 months before getting before I started to get back on my feet.

1. Divorce is brutal for the man because he is almost inevitably made homeless.
2. Men have almost no support system other than their families.
3. Parents love their kids and help out.

In my opinion your list of "red flags" is somewhat superficial.
I wouldn't necessarily fault someone for have a loving and supportive family that they rely upon in a time of crisis.

As with many things you should measure not by the current situation but by the trajectory.

Yeah, ok, but the mom and sister thing...

what thing? the "thing" where they don't like his ex? Would you feel better if the mom and sister loved the ex? Why wouldn't his family side with him? You sound crazy.

[Anonymous]

The male PP above provides good perspective on how there could be two sides to this story. But honestly, if you are asking if these are red flags, there's a reason your intuition told you to ask.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:a male perspective....

after my divorce at 40, I moved back home because the ex wife got the house.
I was also unemployed because I was laid off on the same day the divorce was finalized.
I wasn't totally overweight at the time of the divorce but I did gain about 20 lbs after the divorce.
My mom and sister both dislike my ex wife.
I lived at home for about 8 months before getting before I started to get back on my feet.

1. Divorce is brutal for the man because he is almost inevitably made homeless.
2. Men have almost no support system other than their families.
3. Parents love their kids and help out.

In my opinion your list of "red flags" is somewhat superficial.
I wouldn't necessarily fault someone for have a loving and supportive family that they rely upon in a time of crisis.

As with many things you should measure not by the current situation but by the trajectory.

Yeah, ok, but the mom and sister thing...

what thing? the "thing" where they don't like his ex? Would you feel better if the mom and sister loved the ex? Why wouldn't his family side with him? You sound crazy.

Not PP, but he says she his ex should've been able to "deal" with the fact that they hated her. His mom and sister hated her during the marriage and the best he could do was tell his wife to deal? Red flag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:a male perspective....

after my divorce at 40, I moved back home because the ex wife got the house.
I was also unemployed because I was laid off on the same day the divorce was finalized.
I wasn't totally overweight at the time of the divorce but I did gain about 20 lbs after the divorce.
My mom and sister both dislike my ex wife.
I lived at home for about 8 months before getting before I started to get back on my feet.

1. Divorce is brutal for the man because he is almost inevitably made homeless.
2. Men have almost no support system other than their families.
3. Parents love their kids and help out.

In my opinion your list of "red flags" is somewhat superficial.
I wouldn't necessarily fault someone for have a loving and supportive family that they rely upon in a time of crisis.

As with many things you should measure not by the current situation but by the trajectory.

Yeah, ok, but the mom and sister thing...

what thing? the "thing" where they don't like his ex? Would you feel better if the mom and sister loved the ex? Why wouldn't his family side with him? You sound crazy.

No, but there is MORE to that story this guy is not sharing. Yup.

[Anonymous]

He sounds like he dodges responsibility for anything. Cut this one loose OP. Save your sanity.

You can thank us later.

[Anonymous]

Curious about the ex.

[Anonymous]

WTH is this even a question? Any ONE of these things is a no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WTH is this even a question? Any ONE of these things is a no.

OP is kinda desperate, but this trainwreck of a man is even HER second thoughts.

[Anonymous]

I demand for you not to give this guy another thought. I don't care how lonely you are or how desperate you feel about not meeting the right guy yet. NOT THIS ONE.

[Anonymous]

LOL! The man described could be my ex DH:

-lives in parents' basement (we never bought a house together)

-overweight (addicted to video games and does not know how to cook; always eats at fast food joints), eventually developed bad breath

could not be him either because he is broke and will never move out of the basement.

[Anonymous]

I bet OP is banging him at her house as we speak.

[Anonymous]

No. Cut him loose.

[Anonymous]

But for the age, the guy described could also be my ex-husband. So many red flags....

[Anonymous]

I've noticed that when people ask if someone is a red flag, the answer is always YES!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've noticed that when people ask if someone is a red flag, the answer is always YES!

Or just wondering if there would be a reason not to rush to judgement.