DD 5 year old friend told her she won't come back to her dirty house

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Regardless of whether it's true, age 5 is old enough to realize that's rude. She may have been in a temporary snit with your DC and wanted to say something mean.

Way too sophisticated for a 5 year old.
I’ve been pet sitting lately and I can’t believe how filthy,cluttered, and soulless some people’s homes are. Just yucky dirty gross. Sometimes smelly. It’s uncomfortable to be in a house like that.,
OP your house is probably dirty. It’s orobavly really dirty if a 5 year old said something. If you can’t affird to hire a cleaning service you should take a class and/or get a good book that explains how to clean and organize.
You could hire a maid service for a deep cleaning a few times a year to get a handle on things and observe them to learn.

Why don’t you describe your current cleaning routine? How often do you dust? Vacuum? Wash/mop the floors? Clean the bathrooms?

OP says she works full time and busts her butt on the weekends cleaning. I hope she doesn't entertain these questions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Regardless of whether it's true, age 5 is old enough to realize that's rude. She may have been in a temporary snit with your DC and wanted to say something mean.

Way too sophisticated for a 5 year old.
I’ve been pet sitting lately and I can’t believe how filthy,cluttered, and soulless some people’s homes are. Just yucky dirty gross. Sometimes smelly. It’s uncomfortable to be in a house like that.,
OP your house is probably dirty. It’s orobavly really dirty if a 5 year old said something. If you can’t affird to hire a cleaning service you should take a class and/or get a good book that explains how to clean and organize.
You could hire a maid service for a deep cleaning a few times a year to get a handle on things and observe them to learn.

Why don’t you describe your current cleaning routine? How often do you dust? Vacuum? Wash/mop the floors? Clean the bathrooms?

Op here. I am obsessed with cleaning-I vacuum every day, do bathrooms every day, dust once a week, wash floors weekly. No we don’t have pets but we do have 3 kids under 7 and both work full time! Never once a dish in the sink, always clean laundry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have pets? I used to think certain friends' houses were dirty when I was a kid and I didn't want to go there. Usually they were the houses with pets - there was pet hair on the couch, pet bowls on the floor inside, etc. Gross.

It's pretty rude to say something I guess, but maybe your daughter really pushed for a reason that she's not coming back and she didn't want to lie. It would be obnoxious if she'd gone around telling everyone or had said it to your face or something like that though.

I agree with the PPs though that it sounds like you need a cleaner.

Er... where should the pet bowls go? Are you imagining pets to be outside creatures at all times?
But I agree about the hair on the couch.

Omg these people I know have litter boxes in their tiny small kitchen so it smells like poop/pee in there and there’s litter scattered on the kitchen floor - ewwww!!

This is just gross. Op, I think he posts about your house being different from what she knows in that it is older makes the most sense of any of these posts. Move on and don’t invite her over anymore if you don’t want to hear the brat!

[Anonymous]

OP, I would notice if this same friend wants DD to come over to her house after this. It might be they aren't friends any longer and this other girls just blurted out some rude, random reason for not playing together. If this other girl is hurtful, she's going to say hurtful things whether they are true or not.

[Anonymous]

My mom thinks her house is clean. Its filthy. My kids notice. Often people think their nasty homes are clean when they are so nasty, even a 5yr old notices.

[Anonymous]

I always thought my house was dirty growing up. It was professionally cleaned once a week but had pet hair on furniture and floor, dog food / water in the kitchen, and often a lot of dirt tracked in from outside. I'm a bit of a neat freak now and don't have pets bc I don't want to deal with the smells and hair. I shed enough myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am hurt and feel a bit sad for my 5 year old daughter. She always has play dates at her friend's house and then we had a play date this past weekend and my daughter told me that her friend said we have a dirty house and she doesn't want to come back. I can't help but take this personally as DH and I work full time, have 3 kids under 7, bust our butt on the weekends to clean our house. It's not perfect but it's the best we can do. Her parents do have cleaning people weekly if not daily, we don't have that luxury. WWYD?

Damn. I'd probably be the same - sad for my kid. But I'd see it as a "teaching moment" whereby my kid and I could discuss (1) perception and (2) politeness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a 5 year old. I cannot imagine him ever saying a house was too dirty to play at. Now, if your house smelled, yeah he would probably tell me he didn't want to come back.


Either you are trolling off the other post, or your house is inexcusably dirty.

Or they heard their mother talking about the other mother's house all the time and how filthy it was....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a 5 year old. I cannot imagine him ever saying a house was too dirty to play at. Now, if your house smelled, yeah he would probably tell me he didn't want to come back.


Either you are trolling off the other post, or your house is inexcusably dirty.

Or they heard their mother talking about the other mother's house all the time and how filthy it was....

Or the kid has a different perception of clean and dirty than op....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Regardless of whether it's true, age 5 is old enough to realize that's rude. She may have been in a temporary snit with your DC and wanted to say something mean.

Way too sophisticated for a 5 year old.

It really isn't a have a five-year-old girl and host tons of play dates. Trust me, girls can be very mean but what surprises me the most is the sophistication. I remark on it once a week at least. Kid was trying to be mean.

Also, kids confuse dirty and messy. My house is clean (I have a cleaning person!) but it gets messy in 1/2 hour. I hate it and feel like I tidy constantly but it is always messier than I would like. I wouldn't be surprised at all if one my daughter's friends made a remark like that. And other than sharing the disgust at my reality... I really wouldn't give a shit either. Op, who cares about what a kids says?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am hurt and feel a bit sad for my 5 year old daughter. She always has play dates at her friend's house and then we had a play date this past weekend and my daughter told me that her friend said we have a dirty house and she doesn't want to come back. I can't help but take this personally as DH and I work full time, have 3 kids under 7, bust our butt on the weekends to clean our house. It's not perfect but it's the best we can do. Her parents do have cleaning people weekly if not daily, we don't have that luxury. WWYD?

If you and DH are really cleaning like crazy on the weekend, then your house should be close to as clean as a home with a weekly cleaning service. I bet your house is pretty dirty, or at least cluttered.

[Anonymous]

We hosted a 5 year old once. The dog had tracked in mud and I was walking to the closet to get the carpet cleaner. The playmate came in the door at that exact moment, looked at the floor, and said, wow your house is dirty.
Five year olds have no credibility.

[Anonymous]

My dd had a playmate say something very similar. At the time we had 4 kids and the 6 yr old was the oldest so we had a high chair, swing and exersaucer all out in the livingroom and dining room. We also had alphabet magnets on the fridge and the toddler was playing with Little People on the floor. After a few visits to her house my daughter reported that their house was scary. They were not allowed to have toys out in the house anywhere other than the kid's bedrooms. The rest of the house looked like only adults lived there. Not a school picture on the wall or a drawing hanging on the fridge. I am sure that little girl got told all of the time that any of the things we had made a house "dirty"

[Anonymous]

Op here. I am obsessed with cleaning-I vacuum every day, do bathrooms every day, dust once a week, wash floors weekly. No we don’t have pets but we do have 3 kids under 7 and both work full time! Never once a dish in the sink, always clean laundry."

Yes, you are obsessed with cleaning, that is why this bothers you.

Ignore everything else and work on getting this obsession under control.

My suggestion is to try cleaning every other day, that really would be enough.

Try spending more time with your kids rather than cleaning so much.

They are going to be grown up before you know it.

You will have time to clean then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a 5 year old. I cannot imagine him ever saying a house was too dirty to play at. Now, if your house smelled, yeah he would probably tell me he didn't want to come back.


Either you are trolling off the other post, or your house is inexcusably dirty.

Or they heard their mother talking about the other mother's house all the time and how filthy it was....

This is absolutely what happened. Judgmental mom was running her mouth and kid overheard it.