Where to meet quality men around here?!?!??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tough love:

You are 35 and never married. You are a teacher, so you don't make a lot of money. I have no idea how attractive you are, so let's take that off the table.

Guys your age who are single and never married either have issues, or do not ever want to get married. The issues can be anything, but my guess is they would probably eliminate them from the "quality" pool in your eyes. And unlike prior generations, where a guy would often pooh pooh marriage and then eventually march to the altar because 90% of all adults get married, men this age and younger see never marrying as a completely valid option. So I'm going to guess that eliminates "quality" for you as well.

So, are you interested in any divorced men? Are you prepared for stepchildren? Burdensome child support payments? Bitchy ex-wives? Because this is the marketplace you might find yourself dabbling in, but not everyone can handle it.

Get out of your basement much? There are plenty of guys in their 30s with a solid background who would love to meet a cute teacher who is reasonably attractive and fun.

[Anonymous]

you should like you're an airplane full of baggage.

[Anonymous]

*you sound like you're an airplane full of baggage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tough love:

You are 35 and never married. You are a teacher, so you don't make a lot of money. I have no idea how attractive you are, so let's take that off the table.

Guys your age who are single and never married either have issues, or do not ever want to get married. The issues can be anything, but my guess is they would probably eliminate them from the "quality" pool in your eyes. And unlike prior generations, where a guy would often pooh pooh marriage and then eventually march to the altar because 90% of all adults get married, men this age and younger see never marrying as a completely valid option. So I'm going to guess that eliminates "quality" for you as well.

So, are you interested in any divorced men? Are you prepared for stepchildren? Burdensome child support payments? Bitchy ex-wives? Because this is the marketplace you might find yourself dabbling in, but not everyone can handle it.

Get out of your basement much? There are plenty of guys in their 30s with a solid background who would love to meet a cute teacher who is reasonably attractive and fun.

I don't know any quality guys 35 and up who would be interested in a 35 year old never married teacher. If she were hot, she'd have a man, and she doesn't make enough money to make up for not hot. Sorry, but she needs to take a long hard look at who she has been rejecting. Sounds like she has been trying to play above her league.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I don't know any quality guys 35 and up who would be interested in a 35 year old never married teacher. If she were hot, she'd have a man, and she doesn't make enough money to make up for not hot. Sorry, but she needs to take a long hard look at who she has been rejecting. Sounds like she has been trying to play above her league.

I have known some quality guys over 35 but they tend to get snatched up quickly when they become single.

"Hot" is relative. I'm older (and high quality) and find most 35-year-olds who aren't obese to be pretty hot. I don't have a preferred type or preferred race which also helps me.

I have dated teachers, nurses, grad students, law students, and also doctors, lawyers, economists, government officials and one retired USAF pilot. Even dated a woman who worked retail at Victoria's Secret. Ages have been 23-55.

I am pretty well-off. I don't need a woman who makes a lot of money, as long as she doesn't expect us to live beyond our means.

[Anonymous]

Guys your age who are single and never married either have issues, or do not ever want to get married. The issues can be anything, but my guess is they would probably eliminate them from the "quality" pool in your eyes. And unlike prior generations, where a guy would often pooh pooh marriage and then eventually march to the altar because 90% of all adults get married, men this age and younger see never marrying as a completely valid option. So I'm going to guess that eliminates "quality" for you as well.

I don't think that's true. I have two good very male friends from work who are quality guys - reasonable looking, but not gorgeous, decent jobs but not millionaires, graduate degrees, on the nerdier side but not socially inept - who did not get married until their early to mid 40s. There wasn't anything seriously wrong with them, and they did want to get married. If I had been single, I would have considered dating either of them if they'd asked me out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I don't know any quality guys 35 and up who would be interested in a 35 year old never married teacher. If she were hot, she'd have a man, and she doesn't make enough money to make up for not hot. Sorry, but she needs to take a long hard look at who she has been rejecting. Sounds like she has been trying to play above her league.

I have known some quality guys over 35 but they tend to get snatched up quickly when they become single.

"Hot" is relative. I'm older (and high quality) and find most 35-year-olds who aren't obese to be pretty hot. I don't have a preferred type or preferred race which also helps me.

I have dated teachers, nurses, grad students, law students, and also doctors, lawyers, economists, government officials and one retired USAF pilot. Even dated a woman who worked retail at Victoria's Secret. Ages have been 23-55.

I am pretty well-off. I don't need a woman who makes a lot of money, as long as she doesn't expect us to live beyond our means.

Sounds like you only want hook ups, though. That, and your take anyone who will have you approach, lowers your quality rating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Sounds like you only want hook ups, though. That, and your take anyone who will have you approach, lowers your quality rating.

Keep telling yourself that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tough love:

You are 35 and never married. You are a teacher, so you don't make a lot of money. I have no idea how attractive you are, so let's take that off the table.

Guys your age who are single and never married either have issues, or do not ever want to get married. The issues can be anything, but my guess is they would probably eliminate them from the "quality" pool in your eyes. And unlike prior generations, where a guy would often pooh pooh marriage and then eventually march to the altar because 90% of all adults get married, men this age and younger see never marrying as a completely valid option. So I'm going to guess that eliminates "quality" for you as well.

So, are you interested in any divorced men? Are you prepared for stepchildren? Burdensome child support payments? Bitchy ex-wives? Because this is the marketplace you might find yourself dabbling in, but not everyone can handle it.

Gets it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Sounds like you only want hook ups, though. That, and your take anyone who will have you approach, lowers your quality rating.

Keep telling yourself that.

Huh?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Sounds like you only want hook ups, though. That, and your take anyone who will have you approach, lowers your quality rating.

No. Not looking for hookups. I'll date almost anyone once. I always learn something, about another person and myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tough love:

You are 35 and never married. You are a teacher, so you don't make a lot of money. I have no idea how attractive you are, so let's take that off the table.

Guys your age who are single and never married either have issues, or do not ever want to get married. The issues can be anything, but my guess is they would probably eliminate them from the "quality" pool in your eyes. And unlike prior generations, where a guy would often pooh pooh marriage and then eventually march to the altar because 90% of all adults get married, men this age and younger see never marrying as a completely valid option. So I'm going to guess that eliminates "quality" for you as well.

So, are you interested in any divorced men? Are you prepared for stepchildren? Burdensome child support payments? Bitchy ex-wives? Because this is the marketplace you might find yourself dabbling in, but not everyone can handle it.

Gets it

+1

This poster completely gets it. And I say that as a woman!

Add to that that lot of these "unlucky in love" types have something about them that makes them unappealing to men, and it doesn't necessarily have to do with looks. My husband and his friends can usually zero in pretty easily on why a woman is single.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Guys your age who are single and never married either have issues, or do not ever want to get married. The issues can be anything, but my guess is they would probably eliminate them from the "quality" pool in your eyes. And unlike prior generations, where a guy would often pooh pooh marriage and then eventually march to the altar because 90% of all adults get married, men this age and younger see never marrying as a completely valid option. So I'm going to guess that eliminates "quality" for you as well.

I don't think that's true. I have two good very male friends from work who are quality guys - reasonable looking, but not gorgeous, decent jobs but not millionaires, graduate degrees, on the nerdier side but not socially inept - who did not get married until their early to mid 40s. There wasn't anything seriously wrong with them, and they did want to get married. If I had been single, I would have considered dating either of them if they'd asked me out.

Meh, the market clears. People who are high value in the dating world get taken first. Lower value people clear when they match with people of the same value. The market clears slowly when people are introducing roadblocks to the eventual clearing mechanism.

[Anonymous]

online, but stay away from some of those sites that are just trolling for a hook up. I met my husband on chemistry at age 35.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sounds like you only want hook ups, though. That, and your take anyone who will have you approach, lowers your quality rating.

No. Not looking for hookups. I'll date almost anyone once. I always learn something, about another person and myself.

Keep telling yourself that.