How do you grapple with the cost of expensive colleges?

[Anonymous]

Search this forum using the word "donut" (referring to people in the "donut" hole--too rich for financial aid, not rich enough to afford $65k/year) to see several discussions about this topic. For us, knowing we wouldn't qualify for financial aid but could afford only about $30k-35kyear, we only let DS look at schools that were in-state or that frequently offered large merit awards to students like him. He is now at a private SLAC that gave him enough aid to bring the cost down to $32k. He chose that over W&M. If DS hadn't been such a strong student, I think we probably would have had him only to VA state schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We've just been saving. Started at $750 a month when our oldest (8) was born and now we're up to $1250 a month per kid we have 3 total). Our 8 yo has ~ 125k and the younger two have corresponding amounts to their ages.

We plan to pay for all of college and as much as their grad school as we can.

That's great but you deserve this

Most people don't make enough to save that much. It's easy to save when you have enough. If you saved that much with HHI of 120K then you deserve

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We've just been saving. Started at $750 a month when our oldest (8) was born and now we're up to $1250 a month per kid we have 3 total). Our 8 yo has ~ 125k and the younger two have corresponding amounts to their ages.

We plan to pay for all of college and as much as their grad school as we can.

That's great but you deserve this

Most people don't make enough to save that much. It's easy to save when you have enough. If you saved that much with HHI of 120K then you deserve

Where did you see that poster saved that much with a HHI of $120k?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do people automatically write off OOS schools? Some are the same cost or possibly even a bit less than some VA state schools.

Which out of state school will cost less than your Virginia options? UVA (30K), Virginia Tech (26K). A quick comparison of some out of state schools for Virginia residents: Penn State (50K), Ohio Sate (44K) and Maryland (47K). Virginia has wonderful affordable options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our oldest is going to be a sophomore and we expect to have to start talking about college. We make 220K and can't really fathom paying over 60k for his college. I doubt we would get any aid as we we have decent equity in our home, no debts, and college savings (120k for him). But how can a school possibly be worth more than the median income for a household? I went to Michigan for grad school, and even that's 50k out of state without room & board. For people that put a limit on how much they are willing to pay for college, how did you have this conversation with your child? Any tips? We have another kid too whose three years younger, so I having trouble imaging the tuition bill for the year they overlap.

Our HHI is slightly lower than yours for reference. We saved enough for both our children to go to out of state schools. We actually started when we got married and well before our children were born. If it ended up we had not children, we would have been ahead on the retirement front.

Oldest is currently going to an out of state school that was a much better fit than the in state "equivalent". It is a great school for him. Our youngest just graduated and is going to an expensive private i the fall,but received enough merit scholarship so that the cost is roughly equivalent to his brother's.

We live in Virginia and before I had children I assumed that there would be an in state alternative for my children, but in the end they found better options (for them) elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We've just been saving. Started at $750 a month when our oldest (8) was born and now we're up to $1250 a month per kid we have 3 total). Our 8 yo has ~ 125k and the younger two have corresponding amounts to their ages.

We plan to pay for all of college and as much as their grad school as we can.

That's great but you deserve this

Most people don't make enough to save that much. It's easy to save when you have enough. If you saved that much with HHI of 120K then you deserve

NP. I don't know about that. At least they are prioritizing saving for their kids and not wasting it on fast cars and designer clothes and, I don't know, a beach house or something.

It takes discipline and focus to save that much. Look at America's national savings rate. Most people can't force themselves to do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do people automatically write off OOS schools? Some are the same cost or possibly even a bit less than some VA state schools.

Which out of state school will cost less than your Virginia options? UVA (30K), Virginia Tech (26K). A quick comparison of some out of state schools for Virginia residents: Penn State (50K), Ohio Sate (44K) and Maryland (47K). Virginia has wonderful affordable options.

Virginia does have some wonderful options, but not necessarily for every student. For example if your child wants to study physics, UMD is the best option locally. Many state schools offer enough merit aid to make it at least just as expensive as in state if not lower. University of South Carolina, University of Alabama, Miami University in Ohio are three examples.

The ones you mention rarely give much merit aid to out of state students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do people automatically write off OOS schools? Some are the same cost or possibly even a bit less than some VA state schools.

Which out of state school will cost less than your Virginia options? UVA (30K), Virginia Tech (26K). A quick comparison of some out of state schools for Virginia residents: Penn State (50K), Ohio Sate (44K) and Maryland (47K). Virginia has wonderful affordable options.

http://www.iup.edu/admissions/undergraduate/cost/tuition-reduction/

http://www.sru.edu/admissions/tuition-and-fees

https://www.frostburg.edu/ungrad/admiss/

http://www.ship.edu/admissions/tap/

http://www.salisbury.edu/about/costs.html

http://www.edinboro.edu/directory/offices-services/bursar/tuition-and-fees/

http://www.clarion.edu/tuition-and-financial-aid/tuition-and-fees/

https://www.bgsu.edu/bursar/tuition-and-fees.html#tuition

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do people automatically write off OOS schools? Some are the same cost or possibly even a bit less than some VA state schools.

Which out of state school will cost less than your Virginia options? UVA (30K), Virginia Tech (26K). A quick comparison of some out of state schools for Virginia residents: Penn State (50K), Ohio Sate (44K) and Maryland (47K). Virginia has wonderful affordable options.

Virginia does have some wonderful options, but not necessarily for every student. For example if your child wants to study physics, UMD is the best option locally. Many state schools offer enough merit aid to make it at least just as expensive as in state if not lower. University of South Carolina, University of Alabama, Miami University in Ohio are three examples.

The ones you mention rarely give much merit aid to out of state students.

I agree. Our DS wasn't able to find the school size/major(s)/sport he was looking for in state.

[Anonymous]

We were in Florida when our child was born, and bought the prepaid state tuition. So now he can go to any state Florida school, be considered an in-state tuition, and it's covered. He's so happy we did this -- he hates the cold weather and can't wait to get back to Florida.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have $180,00 saved for each child. One leaves for college in 2 years and the other child in 5 years. Anything beyond what we saved they will to take out student loans.

Wow. $180k for each? Wow. Good on ya! That's impressive.

We don't drive fancy cars or have a huge fancy house. We live way below are means.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have $180,00 saved for each child. One leaves for college in 2 years and the other child in 5 years. Anything beyond what we saved they will to take out student loans.

Wow. $180k for each? Wow. Good on ya! That's impressive.

We don't drive fancy cars or have a huge fancy house. We live way below are means.

That's good! We don't either, but that still seems like a lot of savings. What is your HHI?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have prepaid VA 529s for our kids. Before DS started high school, we sat him down and explained that we could pay for 4 years of in state college, including room and board (most of which we would pay for out of our annual income). And that if he wanted to go to OOS or private, he would need merit aid that made up the gap, or came close. (Kid is at TJ, so this is a legitimate possibility for some non-Ivy STEM heavy private and OOS schools). We also told him that he could not take out undergraduate loans, and we would not either. He will likely continue to grad school, and we don't want him in debt before get gets there.

I think this is where a lot of parents in the DMV are. Too much money for need based aid. Not enough to fund 4 years at a private school. I also think it would be unfair for DS to go through HS without knowing that the parameters for us paying for college are. He now knows that if he has his heart set on an OOS or private school, he will need to work hard to make himself an attractive candidate for merit aid.

This also means the we are putting his college list together carefully. He is lucky in that UVA/WM/VT engineering are probably safety schools, given his GPA/SATs. For OOS and private, we are looking at school that traditionally give significant merit aid to TJ kids, that have strong merit aid in general, and/or where his GPA/SATs are on the upper end. He will probably also apply to a couple of schools that are long shots for merit aid, or reaches in general. Butwe are being very clear that even if he gets in, it is not likely he can attend.

I think the important thing is to make sure your kid has realistic expectations. I have known people who have been in our financial situation, not been upfront with their kids about what they can spend, encouraged them to apply to Ivys or super expensive private reach schools without a real possibility of aid. And waited until the kid got in to tell them they couldn't afford the school, and the kid needed to go in state. That seems wrong to me.

I just want to throw out there that your kid has worked hard to get there and kudos to him!! Definitely more than luck. Sounds impressive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have $180,00 saved for each child. One leaves for college in 2 years and the other child in 5 years. Anything beyond what we saved they will to take out student loans.

Wow. $180k for each? Wow. Good on ya! That's impressive.

We don't drive fancy cars or have a huge fancy house. We live way below are means.

That's good! We don't either, but that still seems like a lot of savings. What is your HHI?

Not Pp, but we have the same amount saved for each child. Our HHI is $220k.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have $180,00 saved for each child. One leaves for college in 2 years and the other child in 5 years. Anything beyond what we saved they will to take out student loans.

Wow. $180k for each? Wow. Good on ya! That's impressive.

We don't drive fancy cars or have a huge fancy house. We live way below are means.

That's good! We don't either, but that still seems like a lot of savings. What is your HHI?

Not Pp, but we have the same amount saved for each child. Our HHI is $220k.

Thanks. That HHI helps.