How to deal with sister asking for things in my home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is it your stuff she's asking for? Or your mom's?

+1 can't imagine her wanting a needlepoint pillow you made. Maybe grandmas?
Post sounds dishonest and fishy.

Many of the items she asks for were my moms, but as I said in the OP, she got a whole moving truck filled with mom's house. I took a few items I treasured, like mom's needlepoints, then had them made into cushions. She will want the three Xmas ornaments I have from our childhood. Yes, she is a hoarder, though quite like the TV horror shows. Most of her stuff is really nice, there's just way to much of it. I have a more spare decorating style.

In this situation, I would say something along the lines of - I know we came to our agreement about mom & grandma's things many years ago. I haven't second guessed those choices but it sounds like you are. If this is really important to you, then let's set a date to go back, catalog all the items, and reassess how it's all balanced out.

I would take this approach because I wouldn't want a handful of items to cause a rift in the family and I know my mom wouldn't either. That said, if your sister sees the laundry list of items she got, as you say, and then sees you list of just a few, then hopefully that will give her perspective. Conversely, if you got the most sentimental or highest value items, and sent all the bulky stuff to your sister's house via truck, then you'll get to reflect on that as well.

Overboard. You act like sister is open to reason. You are missing the point that she is not.

[Anonymous]

Sister is out of control. There are some medications that are used for hoarding and kleptomania. It happens in mid- late 40s, female, progressive. Tell her to get a chokehold grip on it now or it will only get worse. Explain she will be the one in the nursing home that everybody has to go to hervroom to get their stuff back! There's one in every nursing home and tell it it's going to be her if she doesn't get a grip. Try to intervene, meaning try to get her to talk about it and admit the problem. If she doesn't, tell her she can call you to discuss it when she finally comes to her senses and admits it after she returns home.

[Anonymous]

"I'll leave it to you in my will!" If she makes a comment say you need it until then but she can have it when you are gone.