Hair under arm

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a hairy person, for pete's sake stop overthinking and agonizing over it. If she's got underarm hair, teach her to shave. NBD. We live in the US, and pit hair is not done here. It's not shaming, it's normal grooming.

Totally this.

[Anonymous]

She's 10. Maybe give her a couple more years before you sit her down and let her know that she's gonna have to spend the rest of her life adhering to society's expectations, lest she be judged.

[Anonymous]

I will also add that once you've mentioned it, and your daughter understands she can come to you when she's ready, you need to drop it.

My 13 year old, who is very dark, expressed interest a year or two ago in shaving her armpits. But she doesn't care about her (very dark) leg hair, or the shadow on her upper lip. I told her (once, in a very matter of fact way) that both of those are things that can be addressed and that I can help her with them if she wants. She hasn't said anything yet, and neither have I. No good can come of it.

[Anonymous]

Letting her start to shave is a is a rite of passage for our daughters becoming woman like when we take them to get their first bras.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Serious question: to all the women saying "she doesn't need to shave if she doesn't want to" -- do you shave under your arms? If so, why not just say "I shave -- as do most women in the U.S. -- so here's a razor if you want to shave too"?

Yes, because we were raised to be ashamed of our natural bodies, and we don't want our little girls programmed at age 10 to be ashamed like we were/are. SO, if it doesn't bother her, why make it an issue? Is it HER issue, or the MOM's issue? Does SHE think it's gross or does MOM think it's gross? Or are we afraid other people will think WE are gross?

I started shaving at 10 or 11 because it looked at felt better, plain and simple. No shame; no pressure. I grew up where we went to the beach all the time. I had this friend whose mother would not let her shave her legs all the way up for some weird reason -- thought it made her look like a slut or something -- so she had this strange line above the knee and hair on her thighs. Why are people so weird about shaving? Most people look better without hair -- men and women alike. I will absolutely give my daughter the option (even if she's not asking about it) when she gets underarm hair. I think it's mean to pretend like it doesn't matter when it does. Would you let her walk around with snot running down her face? that's her natural body, right?

You realize this is subjective, right? And an opinion shaped by cultural norms, not by intrinsic truths.

Centuries ago women in some European cultures used to shave their foreheads to achieve what was considered a mark of beauty - a high forehead. You'd probably find that bizarre today.

People get "weird" about shaving because it's one of a long list of demands on a woman's body that society makes. Just look at that thread from a few weeks ago asking what people's grooming habits were like.

[Anonymous]

My 12 year old is totally comfortable with her body hair and has no desire to shave it. I've offered to teach her, but have also let her know that it is totally ok to leave the hair. It's her body, she should only conform to the beauty standards she sets for herself. Not those that are imposed upon her.

[Anonymous]

I can't believe that there are women who shave their arms or their legs above the knee, but I am a light haired woman with little body hair.

[Anonymous]

Hi op,
my dd was the same age as yours when she too hit puberty a few summers back and I just mentioned to her that if she wanted to start shaving she could & that I had got her a razor & cream of her own. Why not make a draw in the bathroom specially for her with a razor, cream, deodorant, pads/liners, tampons, & shampoo.

[Anonymous]

My dd kept asking over several months if she could start shaving when she was nine, she was a rather hairy girl but I kept putting it off then for her tenth birthday I gave her a nice razor and gel and taught her the correct way to shave areas then left her to it. I don't know how often or where she shaves I am just the money that buys replacement blades and gel when she asks lol.

[Anonymous]

OT, but do people really use electric razors on their underarms?? Does this really work better?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't believe that there are women who shave their arms or their legs above the knee, but I am a light haired woman with little body hair.

I really do mean this in a nice way, but go away. I am a woman of Mediterranean descent with PCOS. Hair management has always been at the forefront, and for a young girl, she should just treat it matter of factory and help her get rid of it. We want to be so PC and "nurturing" but there's simply nothing awesome about being a hairy female. Blondes with fine hair don't get it.

[Anonymous]

I highly recommend "The Care and Keeping of You" for all girls (and parents!) as the girls start to enter the puberty years. It's a great resource (and if the tampon info is a bit too much too early - you can excise those pages if you want).

Get the book!