Is having 3 kids harder now than it was when they were little?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are 9 8 and 5 and while yes the physical parenting is a million times easier the practices, homework and weekend sports mean that other things get a lot harder. It's just a different kind of hard.

No, that's not harder. That's easier. And much of it is also optional.

[Anonymous]

Mine are 11, 9, 7, 5 and things are much, much easier now than they used to be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mine are 16, 14, and 11. They are difficult in a much different way. We battle about cell phones, clothes, lost sports gear, curfews, chores and homework. We have tutors and sports practices, fundraisers and field trips that take a ton of time, money and energy. School is much more demanding, and each child has different needs that we have to meet while they are fighting us the entire way. Little kids are physically exhausting, but teenagers take an emotional toll that we did not expect.

Agree 100%. I'll take the physical exhaustion of younger kids over the mental exhaustion of my 10 and 12 year olds anyway. Again, just a different kind of hard.

I have to say +1 to these.

It doesn't get easier, it just gets different.

I have three – ages 13, 10 and 4, so I can see both sides of the street, so to speak. But trucking my can't-drive-herself-anywhere teen places, the angst of middle school, and the enormity of our grocery bill every month tell me that the grass it not always greener just because they're older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still have little ones, but I wonder if some people saying it is harder also went back to work or stopped having full time help as the kids got older. I work part time and just can't imagine that my life won't be easier when the kids are in school all day.

Yes, probably- I mean, most people need or want to return to work full time as their kids get older, when they are focusing on saving for college, etc. I've honestly never understood the moms who SAH once their kids are all in school. I think with 3 school-aged kids, part time would be ideal, but I will probably have to go back FT to meet our savings goals. As for outsourcing, the only thing we have now is a cleaning person every other week, which I anticipate we will keep.

Or they were the ones who had their kids in FT childcare 50+ hours a week, but schools don't offer that to the same extent and/or the kids are more vocal about what they want from their parents. It's easy to tell yourself that your one year old is better off in daycare, harder to ignore when your 11 year old gets upset with you for working all the time.

That's not to say older kids aren't hard or don't need their parents or don't have their challenges, they certainly do. But they're also self-sufficient in ways that very young kids are functionally incapable of being.

[Anonymous]

It got easier for me when my youngest was closer to 5. They are 5, 7 and 9 now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have three kids but they are 7, 5, and 1. Our transition to three has been substantially easier than our transition to two kids... the key was that the older two are just that - older. Anything under the age of four makes life difficult... potty training, naps, tantrums, etc. Just hold out for the good times, OP!

Almost same here, except 7, 4, and still a baby. My just-turned-4 year old is becoming so much easier, and our transition to three has been pretty seamless because the older two have a little independence. We are definitely done, so I can see the light at the end of the little kid tunnel in 3-4 years! Of course, bigger kids bring other challenges. I think it's always hard in some ways. Love having three though, wouldn't want it any other way!

I'm the PP with 7, 5, and 1. Mine will be 8, 6, and 2 this summer... already looking forward to it being even easier than last summer. I LOVE having three kids. We really thought we were finished with two and the third was a surprise (genuinely was a surprise - I was on BCP). She has been the most pleasant and enjoyable baby yet and I've truly enjoyed every second just soaking in all of our last baby milestones. I'm in no rush for her to grow - but I agree, I know there is a much easier road ahead! Although it's all relative - my elementary schoolers are hard, just in completely different ways. So much homework, so many practices, random friend dramas... babies are pretty easy in that respect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mine are 16, 14, and 11. They are difficult in a much different way. We battle about cell phones, clothes, lost sports gear, curfews, chores and homework. We have tutors and sports practices, fundraisers and field trips that take a ton of time, money and energy. School is much more demanding, and each child has different needs that we have to meet while they are fighting us the entire way. Little kids are physically exhausting, but teenagers take an emotional toll that we did not expect.

Agree 100%. I'll take the physical exhaustion of younger kids over the mental exhaustion of my 10 and 12 year olds anyway. Again, just a different kind of hard.

I agree. We only have two but it is emotionally exhausting now that they are older.

[Anonymous]

Take it from someone who has an 11 year old and a 2 year old at the same time (a 9 year old too) -
Big kid issues are big and little kid issues are little.
Yes diapers and constant supervision can suck, but they are a walk in the park in contrast to puberty, social drama, opposite sex drama, the introduction of drugs and adult themes and adult issues, the struggles in school and sports drama and fearing that puberty hormones could be something more.... It's hard.
So much harder than my 2 year old throwing her sweet potatoes all over the kitchen.

[Anonymous]

My girls are 3 and 6. I work ft. Cant wait till they are 6 and 9. We havent done activities much bc they are in school till 6, so wkds are downtime. Need to get on that this year and give them more to do...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mine are now 19, 17 and 15.
I would switch places with OP in a heartbeat and never leave that sweet time when the hardest part of parenting had to do with pee and poop.

This is what I'm fearing and mine are 4, 6 & 8.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like there's a sweet spot. Ages 4-9 maybe?

I have almost 8, 4 and 2 year olds. While I don't think good parenting is easy at any age, I like where we are with our oldest. She can take care of her most basic points of care, sleeps 10.5 hours a night and does chores. Yes there's homework, practices, occasional outbursts and friendship drama, but she takes half the energy of her siblings. And she is our most headstrong and tireless child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mine are now 19, 17 and 15.
I would switch places with OP in a heartbeat and never leave that sweet time when the hardest part of parenting had to do with pee and poop.

I have an 18 yo, 1 year old and newborn.

The 18 year old causes the most stress...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are 9 8 and 5 and while yes the physical parenting is a million times easier the practices, homework and weekend sports mean that other things get a lot harder. It's just a different kind of hard.

No, that's not harder. That's easier. And much of it is also optional.

That's true. Its so much easier to forbid activities and friendships.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mine are 16, 14, and 11. They are difficult in a much different way. We battle about cell phones, clothes, lost sports gear, curfews, chores and homework. We have tutors and sports practices, fundraisers and field trips that take a ton of time, money and energy. School is much more demanding, and each child has different needs that we have to meet while they are fighting us the entire way. Little kids are physically exhausting, but teenagers take an emotional toll that we did not expect.

We are just entering this phase with a 14, 11, 8 and 7. Like is easier than when they were in diapers and the toddler stage, but mentally this stage is challenging too.

[Anonymous]

Mine are 6, 9, and 12, and things are MUCH easier than they were for the first four or so years of the littlest one's life! I have relatively easy kids, though, and the oldest is just now beginning puberty and accompanying tween-ish challenges. But they (mostly) all sleep well, eat well, entertain each other and themselves, wipe their own butts and tie their own shoes... yes, it gets easier! I suspect I'm in a sweet spot and that things will get harder when two of them are teens at the same time, but for now, life is good.