10-year-old DD only wants to read YA fantasy novels

[Anonymous]

Get her the Graceling books. Great stories and the romantic relationships are handled well - sex is not explicit and there is a focus on consent and preventing pregnancy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never allow it. If this is A Court of Thorns and Roses, here is what Commonsensemedia says:

Though the heated descriptions are usually more titillating than graphic, sex is a big part of the story, and it's not just the attraction between Feyre and Tamlin. As the story begins, Feyre's friends-with-benefits relationship with a village boy is ending; Tamlin, being immortal, has had many lovers. A character must play the starring role in a fertility rite, having ritual sex to ensure the year's crops.

Killing, mutilation, and gore -- of faeries, humans, and other species -- are a constant presence and vividly described, as when a faerie's wings are hacked off or another's head is impaled in the garden. Characters are sometimes forced to kill against their will; sometimes they do it enthusiastically. There's also strong sexual menace: One character becomes the lackey and sex slave of an evil queen to save his kingdom from a worse fate; Feyre is menaced by characters intent on raping and killing her and in other scenes is beaten until her bones fracture. The royals and courtiers of the various faerie Courts have a long history of deadly intrigue that often runs to wiping out all their relatives.

Recurring strong language includes "s--t," "damn," and "hell

https://www.commonsensemedia.org/book-reviews/a-court-of-thorns-and-roses

Yes, that's the book. Thanks for the reference.

I'm the poster above who gave the specific info. on the book. I'm interested in whether any of the (many) parents who thought it was just fine feel the same way after seeng the particulars on the book, now. (Meaning, are we that lax that we just okay things for our kids without spending a few minutes investigating them???)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get her the Graceling books. Great stories and the romantic relationships are handled well - sex is not explicit and there is a focus on consent and preventing pregnancy.

Thanks, she has read those, but I appreciate all the suggestions on this thread because some of the titles/authors are new to me. I just ordered some books by Tamora Pierce and Diana Wynne Jones, and by the magic of Amazon, they should be here later today. I'm hopeful we'll find some books--ideally with dozens of sequels--we both feel good about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never allow it. If this is A Court of Thorns and Roses, here is what Commonsensemedia says:

Though the heated descriptions are usually more titillating than graphic, sex is a big part of the story, and it's not just the attraction between Feyre and Tamlin. As the story begins, Feyre's friends-with-benefits relationship with a village boy is ending; Tamlin, being immortal, has had many lovers. A character must play the starring role in a fertility rite, having ritual sex to ensure the year's crops.

Killing, mutilation, and gore -- of faeries, humans, and other species -- are a constant presence and vividly described, as when a faerie's wings are hacked off or another's head is impaled in the garden. Characters are sometimes forced to kill against their will; sometimes they do it enthusiastically. There's also strong sexual menace: One character becomes the lackey and sex slave of an evil queen to save his kingdom from a worse fate; Feyre is menaced by characters intent on raping and killing her and in other scenes is beaten until her bones fracture. The royals and courtiers of the various faerie Courts have a long history of deadly intrigue that often runs to wiping out all their relatives.

Recurring strong language includes "s--t," "damn," and "hell

https://www.commonsensemedia.org/book-reviews/a-court-of-thorns-and-roses

Yes, that's the book. Thanks for the reference.

I'm the poster above who gave the specific info. on the book. I'm interested in whether any of the (many) parents who thought it was just fine feel the same way after seeng the particulars on the book, now. (Meaning, are we that lax that we just okay things for our kids without spending a few minutes investigating them???)

I don't believe in censoring reading material. I have a 10yo 5th grader. She's on the innocent/immature side. She wouldn't be interested in something like this, because she doesn't like romance, but if she expressed an interest, I'd recommend somethig more her speed. If she insisted, I'd make sure we discussed the more provocative themes.

I read my first stephen king novel when I was in 6th grade. I'm sure I read things in 5th grade that would be considered inappropriate. I'm glad my mom didn't try to censor me. If she had, I would have either sneaked to read the forbidden books or stopped reading. I feel it's much healthier to let them explore in the open rather than sneak and hide or shut down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never allow it. If this is A Court of Thorns and Roses, here is what Commonsensemedia says:

Though the heated descriptions are usually more titillating than graphic, sex is a big part of the story, and it's not just the attraction between Feyre and Tamlin. As the story begins, Feyre's friends-with-benefits relationship with a village boy is ending; Tamlin, being immortal, has had many lovers. A character must play the starring role in a fertility rite, having ritual sex to ensure the year's crops.

Killing, mutilation, and gore -- of faeries, humans, and other species -- are a constant presence and vividly described, as when a faerie's wings are hacked off or another's head is impaled in the garden. Characters are sometimes forced to kill against their will; sometimes they do it enthusiastically. There's also strong sexual menace: One character becomes the lackey and sex slave of an evil queen to save his kingdom from a worse fate; Feyre is menaced by characters intent on raping and killing her and in other scenes is beaten until her bones fracture. The royals and courtiers of the various faerie Courts have a long history of deadly intrigue that often runs to wiping out all their relatives.

Recurring strong language includes "s--t," "damn," and "hell

https://www.commonsensemedia.org/book-reviews/a-court-of-thorns-and-roses

Yes, that's the book. Thanks for the reference.

I'm the poster above who gave the specific info. on the book. I'm interested in whether any of the (many) parents who thought it was just fine feel the same way after seeng the particulars on the book, now. (Meaning, are we that lax that we just okay things for our kids without spending a few minutes investigating them???)

I don't believe in censoring reading material. I have a 10yo 5th grader. She's on the innocent/immature side. She wouldn't be interested in something like this, because she doesn't like romance, but if she expressed an interest, I'd recommend somethig more her speed. If she insisted, I'd make sure we discussed the more provocative themes.

I read my first stephen king novel when I was in 6th grade. I'm sure I read things in 5th grade that would be considered inappropriate. I'm glad my mom didn't try to censor me. If she had, I would have either sneaked to read the forbidden books or stopped reading. I feel it's much healthier to let them explore in the open rather than sneak and hide or shut down.

In total agreement with the last quoted poster. I don't censor media or "not allow" my children to read/watch something unless law or policy requires it (i.e. no, at 12 they couldn't go alone to an R rated movie in theater... either I went along or they had to wait for it to be released on video/DVD. )

If needed we just discuss themes, new info, or anything else they want to talk about.

If they're no longer enjoying the book for any reason they'll choose to stop reading.

I read tons of "questionable" things as a tween or teen, with plenty of olence and sex included. Generally I skipped over the sex to get to the rest of the plot, but even when I didn't, things I didn't understand at the time went right over my head. I don't think my reading material did me any harm, nor has this policy seemed to negatively impact my two oldest (now 22 and 20).

We're continuing the same discussion but no censorship policy with DD12 and will do so with DD3 when it becomes applicable unless she for some reason seems to need firmer limits to keep from making choices that overwhelm or upset her.

[Anonymous]

^sorry, typo above, I'm posting from my phone. "...plenty of violence and sex included"

[Anonymous]

I also think that this book is too advanced for a 10yo - first clue is that the protagonist is 19 instead of the usual YA age of 15-16. I've read this book and the common sense review is spot on. Definitely not appropriate.

Would she maybe like the Marion Zimmer Bradley Darkover series? I read it as a child - it might not be appealing to kids nowadays but I feel like there was plenty of scifi/fantasy when I was in middle school that didn't have the graphic sex/violence/sexual assault parts in it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:atleast she reads. better than having her be a screen zombie

I would pre-screen for violence and sexual content as some of the urban fantasy novels are more adult than young adult.

Not necessarily when reading all the graphic is way less (what you can imagine) compared to what is shown on screen. Kids can read way more mature books but same can't be said of those movies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also think that this book is too advanced for a 10yo - first clue is that the protagonist is 19 instead of the usual YA age of 15-16. I've read this book and the common sense review is spot on. Definitely not appropriate.

Would she maybe like the Marion Zimmer Bradley Darkover series? I read it as a child - it might not be appealing to kids nowadays but I feel like there was plenty of scifi/fantasy when I was in middle school that didn't have the graphic sex/violence/sexual assault parts in it.

As I recall, there was plenty of sex/violence/sexual assault in the Darkover books.

I also read book after book about Anne McCaffrey's dragons on Pern, and having reread some of them now, I can say with confidence that they didn't age well. Not to mention that they are also full of dragonsex, dragonviolence, and dragonsexual assault.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This book sounds like porn and also sadistic. I would not be okay with it. My daughter is 5 so we aren't there yet, but I think I would read the book also and sit down with her and be specific about what is unhealthy in it.
Then I would direct her to The Perilous Gard, by Elizabeth Marie Pope, and also Fire & Hemlock by Diana Wynne Jones. Both stories engage with the ancient European mythos of the Fae stealing humans, but also are age appropriate, exciting stories, strong heroines, and generally more wholesome.

The Perilous Gard is a really great book from my perspective as an adult, but I didn't read it as a child, and I haven't successfully gotten my kids (9 and 12) to read it yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My concern wouldn't be that she's reading fantasy, but that she's reading fantasy aimed at a more mature audience. Try introducing her to Diana Wynne Jones books. Tamora Pierce also writes excellent YA fantasy. The Circle of Magic series is good for younger readers, and the Tortall books skew older, but when sex comes up in them, it is handled well, particularly in terms of consent and protection against pregnancy.

They also have really strong female protagonists. The only thing I don't like is when the strong (YOUNG) females enter into romances with their older mentors, but I still think the Tortall books are some of the best on the market for girls who like fantasy/sci fi.

Yes, the Daine/Numair thing is icky.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't provide it to her, but if she seeks it out and wants to read it - then let her. If you want to read it too to make sure you can ask her questions - do that too. She's reading - and that's important. She'll skip over or not absorb the stuff that she's not ready for. That's what I did when I was her age - my mom let me read anything YA and younger. By 8th grade I was reading the Thorn Birds - I am still an avid reader.

[Anonymous]

tHe Hollow Kingdom by Clare Dunkle sounds like a good alternative to this book.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get her the Graceling books. Great stories and the romantic relationships are handled well - sex is not explicit and there is a focus on consent and preventing pregnancy.

I agree - although I found them lightweight, they are probably just right for 10yo.

[Anonymous]

OP, have a look at A Great And Terrible Beauty by Libba Bray. It has the fantasy elements your daughter likes, and is set at a Victorian boarding school for girls (after the main character's mother was killed in India, where her father was posted). It is written for young adults, but I actually found it quite charming, and read the trilogy as some of my freshmen students were reading it.