I'm ashamed of my husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe your dh knows this and was eager in order to impress you. I feel bad for the guy! Does he have friends?

Maybe he was trying. He always tries too hard, and it's just to much.

Did I mention the dancing? He had to convince everyone to dance, and I do love dancing, but he's so bad at it.

I suppose he always was a dork, it wasn't such a big deal when were younger, but I feel like the standard is different now that we're in our 30s.

As for why I married him he's a nice guy, smart, decent family, we had fun together, I guess I loved him.

This makes me laugh. When you were younger? Did you marry when you were 15? Good God, you're in your 30s--you're still young.

OP, your DH is comfortable with who he is. I'm hoping you'll learn to be less shallow as you age. Not sure what will help, but you're the one who really needs it. Your DH could buy a better wardrobe or workout more, but you need to grow up.

We've been together since we were 22 and married since we were 25. I agree that we are still young in the grand scheme of things, but I feel as though our 30s are a time to "cement" ourselves and impressions matter. He's going to be 33 next month I wish he'd care a little more. We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more.

[Anonymous]

Maybe I'm shallow too but I get what the OP is saying. Not sure how to help on the lack of conversation/dorkiness, but as for wardrobe -- it's doable. You need to go thru his closet and get rid of EVERY SINGLE thing that you don't want to see him in and replace it with things that you think look good. Bonus points if you could put it together on hangers and train him that he MUST wear everything off on one hanger as one outfit. That means when he spills on the blue shirt with khaki pant outfit, he doesn't just go throw on a pair of navy pants. He must wear whatever the navy pants are paired with as well.

As for the dancing -- dance lessons? Practice at home watching youtube - as there are home videos of people dancing to every top 40 song out there? Not suggesting you guys should bust out a routine when you're out with friends, but some basic practice may help him find some rhythm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe your dh knows this and was eager in order to impress you. I feel bad for the guy! Does he have friends?

Maybe he was trying. He always tries too hard, and it's just to much.

Did I mention the dancing? He had to convince everyone to dance, and I do love dancing, but he's so bad at it.

I suppose he always was a dork, it wasn't such a big deal when were younger, but I feel like the standard is different now that we're in our 30s.

As for why I married him he's a nice guy, smart, decent family, we had fun together, I guess I loved him.

This makes me laugh. When you were younger? Did you marry when you were 15? Good God, you're in your 30s--you're still young.

OP, your DH is comfortable with who he is. I'm hoping you'll learn to be less shallow as you age. Not sure what will help, but you're the one who really needs it. Your DH could buy a better wardrobe or workout more, but you need to grow up.

We've been together since we were 22 and married since we were 25. I agree that we are still young in the grand scheme of things, but I feel as though our 30s are a time to "cement" ourselves and impressions matter. He's going to be 33 next month I wish he'd care a little more. We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more.

What if your kid acts/looks like him? Will you find a way to overlook the "flaws" or will you just keep trying until you get one you like?

[Anonymous]

"We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more."

Ugh, please get help before you have kids, or reconsider having kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I'm shallow too but I get what the OP is saying. Not sure how to help on the lack of conversation/dorkiness, but as for wardrobe -- it's doable. You need to go thru his closet and get rid of EVERY SINGLE thing that you don't want to see him in and replace it with things that you think look good. Bonus points if you could put it together on hangers and train him that he MUST wear everything off on one hanger as one outfit. That means when he spills on the blue shirt with khaki pant outfit, he doesn't just go throw on a pair of navy pants. He must wear whatever the navy pants are paired with as well.

As for the dancing -- dance lessons? Practice at home watching youtube - as there are home videos of people dancing to every top 40 song out there? Not suggesting you guys should bust out a routine when you're out with friends, but some basic practice may help him find some rhythm.

You're both missing the points that: 1, OP should have known by now; 2, trying to change him won't work at this point; 3, OP won't change either; 4, there are far more serious problems married couples face all over this board; 5, OP is being unreasonable.

OP, every couple has issues. You're lucky that your issues are so utterly meaningless. OTOH, if you're going to stop loving the man over something as stupid as this, then you just may deserve to be alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He's going to be 33 next month I wish he'd care a little more. We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more.

Oh God, please don't start a family with him if you feel this way. What matters most with a family is love and acceptance, and you are lacking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I'm shallow too but I get what the OP is saying. Not sure how to help on the lack of conversation/dorkiness, but as for wardrobe -- it's doable. You need to go thru his closet and get rid of EVERY SINGLE thing that you don't want to see him in and replace it with things that you think look good. Bonus points if you could put it together on hangers and train him that he MUST wear everything off on one hanger as one outfit. That means when he spills on the blue shirt with khaki pant outfit, he doesn't just go throw on a pair of navy pants. He must wear whatever the navy pants are paired with as well.

As for the dancing -- dance lessons? Practice at home watching youtube - as there are home videos of people dancing to every top 40 song out there? Not suggesting you guys should bust out a routine when you're out with friends, but some basic practice may help him find some rhythm.

Thank you! I'm glad someone gets it. I've tried with the clothes. I have, and I suppose I can try again.

The dancing though is truly a lost cause, we had dance lessons for our wedding, so our first dance wouldn't be a complete disaster,his body is just incapable of moving in rhythm of any sort. He tries hard, but he just can't. I'm afraid to suggest looking on Youtube as he might try to surprise me with something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's going to be 33 next month I wish he'd care a little more. We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more.

Oh God, please don't start a family with him if you feel this way. What matters most with a family is love and acceptance, and you are lacking.

I never said I didn't love him. I'm fond of him. I disagree that love is what matters most, yes it's great, but in today's world children need every advantage they can get and it's no secret social networking helps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's going to be 33 next month I wish he'd care a little more. We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more.

Oh God, please don't start a family with him if you feel this way. What matters most with a family is love and acceptance, and you are lacking.

+1! God forbid OP has a daughter who doesn't confirm to her standards of beauty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's going to be 33 next month I wish he'd care a little more. We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more.

Oh God, please don't start a family with him if you feel this way. What matters most with a family is love and acceptance, and you are lacking.

I never said I didn't love him. I'm fond of him. I disagree that love is what matters most, yes it's great, but in today's world children need every advantage they can get and it's no secret social networking helps.

Ok, troll. You went too far. Thread over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe your dh knows this and was eager in order to impress you. I feel bad for the guy! Does he have friends?

Maybe he was trying. He always tries too hard, and it's just to much.

Did I mention the dancing? He had to convince everyone to dance, and I do love dancing, but he's so bad at it.

I suppose he always was a dork, it wasn't such a big deal when were younger, but I feel like the standard is different now that we're in our 30s.

As for why I married him he's a nice guy, smart, decent family, we had fun together, I guess I loved him.

This makes me laugh. When you were younger? Did you marry when you were 15? Good God, you're in your 30s--you're still young.

OP, your DH is comfortable with who he is. I'm hoping you'll learn to be less shallow as you age. Not sure what will help, but you're the one who really needs it. Your DH could buy a better wardrobe or workout more, but you need to grow up.

We've been together since we were 22 and married since we were 25. I agree that we are still young in the grand scheme of things, but I feel as though our 30s are a time to "cement" ourselves and impressions matter. He's going to be 33 next month I wish he'd care a little more. We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more.

What if your kid acts/looks like him? Will you find a way to overlook the "flaws" or will you just keep trying until you get one you like?

Don't be dramatic! Facially he is just fine he just needs to lose wight and tone up. I plan on instilling healthy eating habits in my children so size shouldn't be an issue.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe your dh knows this and was eager in order to impress you. I feel bad for the guy! Does he have friends?

Maybe he was trying. He always tries too hard, and it's just to much.

Did I mention the dancing? He had to convince everyone to dance, and I do love dancing, but he's so bad at it.

I suppose he always was a dork, it wasn't such a big deal when were younger, but I feel like the standard is different now that we're in our 30s.

As for why I married him he's a nice guy, smart, decent family, we had fun together, I guess I loved him.

This makes me laugh. When you were younger? Did you marry when you were 15? Good God, you're in your 30s--you're still young.

OP, your DH is comfortable with who he is. I'm hoping you'll learn to be less shallow as you age. Not sure what will help, but you're the one who really needs it. Your DH could buy a better wardrobe or workout more, but you need to grow up.

We've been together since we were 22 and married since we were 25. I agree that we are still young in the grand scheme of things, but I feel as though our 30s are a time to "cement" ourselves and impressions matter. He's going to be 33 next month I wish he'd care a little more. We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more.

What if your kid acts/looks like him? Will you find a way to overlook the "flaws" or will you just keep trying until you get one you like?

Don't be dramatic! Facially he is just fine he just needs to lose wight and tone up. I plan on instilling healthy eating habits in my children so size shouldn't be an issue.

That's not how this works. That is not how any of this works. Hopefully he is the brains of the operation or your children are effed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's going to be 33 next month I wish he'd care a little more. We're trying to start a family, and social connections will matter even more.

Oh God, please don't start a family with him if you feel this way. What matters most with a family is love and acceptance, and you are lacking.

I never said I didn't love him. I'm fond of him. I disagree that love is what matters most, yes it's great, but in today's world children need every advantage they can get and it's no secret social networking helps.

Ok, troll. You went too far. Thread over.

totally. this right here.

[Anonymous]

Many babbies die awkward husband. But some live. Maybe you luck?