Thanksgiving w/ IN LAWS vs. Mom with cancer

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
No brainer, OP. Your mom. Done.

+1

I really wonder if the chorus of "Spend it wit your Mom, of course!" would still echo if the one with cancer was the MIL. Somehow, I doubt it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
No brainer, OP. Your mom. Done.

+1

I really wonder if the chorus of "Spend it wit your Mom, of course!" would still echo if the one with cancer was the MIL. Somehow, I doubt it.

The MIL is someone's "own mom" too. The answer would be exactly the same. You're there for the people who need you. It's simple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
No brainer, OP. Your mom. Done.

+1

I really wonder if the chorus of "Spend it wit your Mom, of course!" would still echo if the one with cancer was the MIL. Somehow, I doubt it.

The hell? Of course that would still be the answer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
No brainer, OP. Your mom. Done.

+1

I really wonder if the chorus of "Spend it wit your Mom, of course!" would still echo if the one with cancer was the MIL. Somehow, I doubt it.

Wow! Are you a bitter MIL? Because I'd make sure DH went to his mother's if she was ill.

I think OP should spend it with her mom. Since we don't know the specifics of mom's situation, or mom's personal preference, I can't say whether I'd send DH and DD off to MIL's as planned or we'd all go to mom's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does your MIL know your mom has cancer?
yes you should do Thanksgiving with your mom this year.

+1! My mom recovered from cancer but there are no guarantees.

[Anonymous]

There is no question. You spend it with your mom.

I would then go out of my way to make sure I visited inlaws soon.

[Anonymous]

My mother had a 5-year prognosis, and died 4 months later.

Go see your mom.

[Anonymous]

Your mom couod have cancer for years. Mine did. She lasted several years even after it spread to other organs. How long are you going to play the cancer card?
They would have told you if the prognosis was less than a year.

[Anonymous]

If you and your mom want to spend Thanksgiving together then you should. I was treated for cancer this year and some family members just carried on business as usual with their busy, busy lives never hitting pause and some family members bent over backwards just to make sure I was doing ok. I am sure this would mean a great deal to your mom even if she lives for another 50 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't even believe there's a decision to be made. You spend the time with your mother who has cancer. Even if it is something that is 'likely' cured, it's still CANCER and scary as fuck for the person diagnosed. You spend the time with your mom, who needs support regardless or whether or not she is dying.

And if your in laws balk at this, then they are a special brand of evil.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is no question. You spend it with your mom.

I would then go out of my way to make sure I visited inlaws soon.

Exactly.

[Anonymous]

You should spend it with your mom for moral support. My mother had cancer. We were pretty confident that she would beat it and she did but it's very hard on a person emotionally and mentally to get a diagnosis like that. My mom was very depressed thinking she was going die. Also, going through chemo and radiation was really tough for her. It makes a lot of people very weak and takes a real toll.

[Anonymous]

I think you have to tell your inlaws that unfortunately, mom was diagnosed with cancer, and we are going to go lend moral support. Do a pre/psot with in laws.

Worst case, I'd send my spouse to MIL's and I'd go to my mom's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your mom couod have cancer for years. Mine did. She lasted several years even after it spread to other organs. How long are you going to play the cancer card?
They would have told you if the prognosis was less than a year.

+1 My mother has had cancer since 2001. I don't have any details about your situation, but it's possible that this might be your new normal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your mom couod have cancer for years. Mine did. She lasted several years even after it spread to other organs. How long are you going to play the cancer card?
They would have told you if the prognosis was less than a year.

+1 My mother has had cancer since 2001. I don't have any details about your situation, but it's possible that this might be your new normal.

Exactly, she won't pass away that fast, OP you are being dramatic.
Don't use this as an excuse to miss holidays with in laws.